Angel of Death
by penscratch
Summary: It's been over a year. Da is dead, the bar is under new ownership. A stranger shows up, and the brothers learn that they aren't the only ones on a mission from God. Can Connor keep from mixing buiness and pleasure with the competition? &first fic, review
1. That Was Interesting

_If you were to give me the choice of going back and not stepping through that door to the pub, and consequently erasing the last year, as well as everything that is to come, I would have to tell you no. I would walk through that door all over again. _

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It was the end of February and a biting wind was blowing through the streets of South Boston. It was about nine o'clock at night and the streets were pretty much empty except for the few people walking to their places of residence or some other warm shelter intent on escaping the chill that was creeping under their clothes and against their skin.

All except one; they stood in the middle of the street just beyond a square of light from the large window of McGuinty's Pub. They stood slouched with a hat low over their face and the hood of a well worn sweatshirt over that; a pack hung limply from one shoulder.

The warm glow from the window beckoned. They could see through the window the blurred forms of people moving around. The door opened as somewhat left, laughter, and shouts of farewell drifted out along with an escape of warm air that just brushed their face before being swallowed by the cold.

That was all the incentive they needed. Clutching the pack tightly against their shoulder they stepped out of the shadow and into the light, moving toward the door. Once inside their head lifted ever so slightly - anyone watching close enough would have had time to see a pair of brown eyes do a quick scan of the room - and then drop back down. They sat at the end of the bar and dropped the pack at their feet. Reaching into their pocket they removed some crumpled bills and dropped them on the counter.

The girl behind the bar came over wiping her hands on a towel. Picking up the money she asked, "What'll it be?"

"Beer."

"What kind?"

"Doesn't matter."

The girl shrugged, and placed a bottle of domestic beer down in front of them. She tried to get a look at their face but they just tilted their head down even farther. Then she got a call from the two guys playing pool for more beer. Leaving the stranger alone she went to oblige.

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"Here you go boys." Mary placed a couple of Guinness bottles on the edge of the pool table.

"Thanks Mary, yer an angel." Murphy MacManus grabbed one and took a large swallow while his twin, Connor, broke on the pool table.

"Indeed." Mary brushed a stray strand of curly red hair that had escaped from her bun back behind her ear. She leaned back against the wall with her arms crossed and examined the person sitting on the edge of the bar with a furrowed brow.

Connor stood up from taking his shot and saw the look on her face. "Hey, what's the matter?"

Mary looked to the slightly taller and more mature MacManus. With his dark blond hair, that had that 'I just got out of bed' look, rugged features and piercing blue eyes he was handsome man. His brother was no exception either, though in a different way. Murphy had the same blue eyes, but his hair was a dark brown, nearly black, and his face slightly rounder.

They had matching tattoos of the holy virgin mother on the left side of their necks as well as a cross on either forearm. Connor had the word _veritas_ (truth) tattooed across the back of his pointer finger on his left hand while Murphy had one reading _aequitas_ (justice) on his right. Murphyhad about three others that were covered by his shirt.

She tilted her head to the solitary figure at the end of the bar. "Him."

Connor followed her gaze. He didn't see anything of consequence, just some guy of slight build hunched and huddled over his beer. Not an uncommon sight in any pub or bar. "What about him?"

Mary shrugged. "I'm not sure; I just got this weird feeling of him. Something about him doesn't seem quite right."

"The only thing not right about him is that he's taking yer attention away from me." Murphy slung an arm around her shoulder. "So Mary, what do ya say we go upstairs and christen that new apartment of yers?" He gave her the smirk that both the brothers were famous for. A smirk that could make any girl forget whatever she was doing.

Except for Mary. She turned her head and gave Murphy a coy smile. "I can't I'm working." She ran a finger down his chest and felt him give a slight intake of breath. "But why don't you drop by later," she placed her hand on the side of his face and gave him a light pat, "when hell freezes over." She headed back towards the bar.

Murphy watched her walk away purposely sashaying her hips.

His brother slapped him on the shoulder. "Fuck Murph, I think she likes ya." Connor laughed and took a swig of his beer. "And it's yer shot." He motioned to the pool table.

"Shut the fuck up Connor." Murphy walked around to the other side of the table to line us his shot. There was a satisfying crack as the cue ball connected with the seven, knocking it into the side pocket. "Solids," he declared proudly. His glance went back to Mary standing behind the bar. "Sides, I think she's warming up to me." He hit in two more of his balls and then missed

"In yer fucking dreams." Connor examined the table. "Fuck. Ya didn't leave me with a bloody decent shot."

Murphy wasn't even listening to his brother grumble. His eyes narrowed as he watched three guys approach Mary at the bar.

"Connor."

"What?"

"I think we got some fucking trouble makers."

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"So I get home today and not only do I find you not at the apartment, I find my stuff fing gone."

Mary glared at the guy standing in front of her. "Really? Considering how little time you spend there I'm surprised you even managed to find your way there in the first place. Besides the rent for that shit hole came out of my paycheck. And as for your stuff not being there, that's because I told the movers to throw it all out."

"Movers?"

"Right, you weren't here. I got another apartment Joe. It's over, it's been over for the two weeks you've been gone."

"Why you little bitch."

Mary stumbled back, throwing a desperate look over at Murphy and Connor, as Joe went to lunge over the bar. But before Murphy or Connor could get there he was yanked backwards by the collar of his shirt. Mary was surprised to see that her rescuer was the little guy from the end of the bar.

"Leave her alone."

"Who the fuckck are you to tell me what to fucking do?" Joe shook him off. He took a swing but the guy sidestepped him and ducked under his arm kicking Joe in the back of the knee so that he fell hitting his head on a barstool.

Joe's friends went to step forward only to have their heads knocked together by Connor and Murphy who had come up behind them.

Joe got to his feet, charging at the little guy who just sidestepped him again. Only this time Joe was able to grab his sleeve, and Joe's forward motion ended up pulling the sweatshirt and cap completely off and over his head.

The entire bar got real quiet. The "he" was in fact a she.

She stood about five foot eight with long thick blond hair that fell about halfway down her back and was mussed from being shoved inside the cap. Her skin was cream colored. She had face was heart shaped with a pink mouth and dark brown eyes under a furrowed brow. She was wearing extremely loose jeans that hid the shape of her lower figure. But with the removal of the oversized sweatshirt she was left wearing a tight fitting white t-shirt that showed off her firm and undoubtedly lithe upper body. Thin, but not skinny, with slight curves. On her face was a look of utter contempt.

Joe stared at her in surprise before his anger came back and he went after her. Only this time she grabbed the beer bottle of the bar top and slammed it down breaking off the end. She spun around with her impromptu weapon causing Joe to come to an abrupt stop.

"I said to leave her alone." Her voice was icy and her grip on the broken bottle tight.

Connor came up next to her. "Ya heard the women."

Murphy appeared on her other side. "So you and yer buddies, get the fuck out."

Seeing that he was out matched, Joe made for the door. But not before throwing one last hateful look Mary's direction.

Murphy took a threatening step forward causing Joe and the other two too finally leave. "Well," he said turning around, "that was interesting"


	2. Your Kind

Murphy made his way behind the bar. He pulled Mary into a comforting hug. "Ya alright?"

Mary nodded and hugged him back. "I'm fine thanks to her."

"What! Connor and I don't get any of the credit?"

Meanwhile Connor had his gaze focused on the girl who was at the moment throwing away the broken bottle. The blond lifted her hand to her mouth and began suck at a cut on her palm from the glass. At the same time she bent over and retrieving her hat and sweatshirt from the floor.

When she stood she made eye contact with him. Her injured hand dropped to her side and she looked at him unwaveringly. Her face no longer held contempt but was calm and void of any emotion and her brown eyes seemed lighter. She looked ethereal.

Connor took a step toward her but stopped when he saw her eyes go dark again and her body stiffen. "You should let someone look at that cut." She didn't say anything, just flicked her eyes over toward Mary. Connor took that to mean she wanted her help rather than his. "Hey Mary, we've got cut that needs taken care of."

Mary pried Murphy's arms off and reached under the counter, pulling out the large first aid kit that was kept there for occasions such as these. Since inheriting the bar from Doc she had learned that at McGunity's there was guaranteed to be at least one bar fight or altercation of some sort in the week that required medical aid in some form or another. And then of course there were the MacManus brothers who would come around at all hours on some night with various degrees of bodily damage. So Mary had stockpiled a very impressive array of medical supplies and had become quite proficient with dealing with a number of different injuries.

"There you go Connor."

Connor shook his head. "I think she would rather have you look at it."

Mary looked at the girl who nodded her agreement. "Alright, come have a seat." The girl sat back down at the bar and laid out her hand palm out. The cut ran all the way across the palm of her hand but wasn't too deep. It wouldn't need stitches. Mary opened the kit and pulled out some cotton balls and the disinfectant. "This might sting a bit."

The girl didn't even flinch as Mary swabbed her hand. Connor and Murphy both shared a look. They knew from experience that the particular bottle of disinfectant that Mary was using was extremely strong. And it didn't just sting; it burned. Still the girl continued to sit there passively, her face blank.

"Thanks for pulling that jackass away from me." Mary took a roll of gauze and began to wrap the cut.

"Your welcome."

"I'm Mary Flannigan by the way. I own this bar."

"Do you now." It was not a question and the girl's voice sounded bored. She pulled her bandaged hand away and curled her fingers over a couple times. "This will do nicely."

Mary raised her eyebrows as the girl pulled the sweatshirt back on and taking her long hair twisted it into a knot which she then shoved back under her cap. "So that's it? You're just going to leave?"

"What reason do I have to stay? My hand is bandaged, and my beer is finished."

"Ya could have another beer and make friends with us." Murphy disappeared under the bar and reappeared with more alcohol in his hands. "Ya know, drink and be merry and all that fun stuff. Sides, it's quite funny to watch a guy get fucked up by a girl. We should celebrate yer victory."

Connor crossed his arms and narrowed his eyes as the girl deliberately ignored his brother. Instead she just picked her bag up off the floor and made her way toward the door.

Murphy just shrugged as she walked away. "Guess not."

Connor however wasn't about to take such blatant rejection from anyone. He quickly stepped moved to the door blocking her path. "Now hold on. The least ya could do is thank us for our help and be nice about refusing to stay."

The girl looked at him and the corner of her mouth twitched every so slightly upwards. "You want me to thank you? To thank your kind?" Her grip on the strap of her bag tightened so much that her knuckles turned white. She moved so that she was standing toe to toe with him and looked up into his face. "Thank you. Thank you for making my life a fucking hell hole from day one."

Connor opened his mouth only to close it again. That was not the answer he was expecting. He glanced over at Murphy and Mary. They had similar looks of confusion on their faces.

He barely even noticed as the girl brushed past him and out the door. Only when the door closed with a bang behind him did he make his way back over to the bar. He sat down and took the beer Murphy handed him without a word.

"Yer kind? Ya don't think she meant the Irish now do ya?"

"Murphy I don't think that little outburst had anything to do with Connor being Irish."

"Then what the fuck did she mean?"

Mary leaned her elbows on the counter. "I think it had to do with him being a guy. I mean when you think about it, other than telling Joe to leave me alone and right there with Connor, she didn't say a word to a single guy in this bar. She barely even looked at you."

The only answer that Murphy and Connor had to that was to tip their bottles up and drink.

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_"What I tell you in the dark; whatI whisper in your ear. Do not be afraid of those who kill the body but cannot kill the soul. Rather, be afraid of the One who can destroy both soul and body in hell, for I am sending you forth to face the burning gates of hell and judgement." _She cocked her gun.

"Who are you?"The man's eyes were wide with terror as she pressed the gun to his forehead.

_"I'm your angel."_ Her blond hair hung over her face shielding her dark brown eyes.

"Angel?"

_"Of death."_ The shot echoed through the ally

The body fell backwards and to the side, the blood pooling quickly. She knelt down and stuck her fingers into the blood, standing she went over to the wall and carefully traced out each individual letter...


	3. Murder

The ringing of the telephone woke Connor up first. He groaned loudly, rolled over and pulled his pillow over his head. It felt like he had the entire cast of River Dance performing in his head. "Fucking hang over. Bloody fucking phone..." The ringing stopped.

"Aye.."

Connor stuck his head out from under his pillow, squinting against the light. Murphy who was slightly less inebriated had answered it.

"Fuck... no it wasn't us... we were at the bar all night...Are ya sure?... alright... we'll be down there soon." He slammed the phone back down into the cradle. "Fuck!"

"What is it?"

"That was Smecker."

It was rare for Smecker to ever contact the boys; they were usually the one to contact him unless it was something big. And even then he didn't use the phone. Connor sat up, closing his eyes as the room began to spin. Once his mental balance was back he pushed aside the covers and got off of his mattress.

"Well what the fuck did he want?"

Murphy had already pulled on his jeans and gray t-shirt and was now in the process of tying his boots. "They found a body. Possible copy cat murder and something to do with religion…"

"Fuck." Connor hurriedly got dressed.

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"It's about time you guys got here. Smecker's going fucking nuts."

Greenly lifted the yellow tape so that the brothers could step under it into the crime scene. They followed him down the alley around the corner to where it deadened. A body lay covered with a tarp but it was bloody writing on the wall that made the brothers pause. In large letters someone had written _Angelus Iussa Letum._

Smecker approached them. "No witnesses, just the report of a gunshot heard last night at around eleven o'clock at night. But the shot wasn't even reported until this morning when someone stumbled across the body when dumping their garbage and decided to report that." He rubbed the bridge of his nose. The normally impeccably dressed FBI agent's clothes were rumpled and his face was exhausted.

"So what," Connor motioned around, "is all this?"

"The victim, twenty five year old white male, shot in the front of the head. Still waiting to ID him. No gun, no bullet casing, no bullets."

"No bullets? It isn't stuck in his head?"

"Nope went straight through and embedded itself in the ground. I think."

Murphy raised his eyebrows. "Ya don't know."

"Based on the position of the body we've been able to determine that he was on his knees and just toppled over after being shot. From there we were then able to figure out where his head was in trajectory to the gun, and based on the angle of the entry and exit wound where the bullet went into the ground. However whoever shot him took the time to dig it out."

"Ya wouldn't think they would have enough time to do that. Let alone take the time to do it even if they did." Connor made his way over to the body and kneeled down next to it. "Ya mind if I take a look."

"Go right ahead."

Connor pulled the tarp away from the head. "Fuck!" He let go and stumbled backwards.

"What?" Murphy joined his brother. "Holy fuck!"

"What is wrong with you two?"

Connor pointed a shaky finger at the body. "We know this man."

"You've got to be kidding me." Smecker made his way back over. "How?"

"We don't know him personally. We just met him last night. Sort of."

Smecker looked at the brothers. "This is sounding way too familiar..."

Murphy shook his head. "Nah, we didn't lay a finger on him..."

"Not that we didn't want to," interjected Connor. "He was hassling Mary. We went over to help her out but someone beat us to him."

"And it was some girl. She gave him a bit of a runaround before he left. He wasn't happy."

"And this girl. Did you know who she was?"

"Never seen her before in our lives. Not the most social of people either."

"That woman who kicked Connor here in the nuts when we worked at the meat packing plant was friendlier."

"Ah, shut up Murph."

"What, it's true."

Smecker ran his hands through his hair. "Alright, Murphy I want you to go give a description of the girl and last night events to Duffy."

"Ya don't think she did it do ya?"

"Connor at this point that is all we've got to go with. And who knows maybe if we find this girl she can give us more information."

Murphy patted Connor on the shoulder and made his way over to Duffy. Smecker made his way over to the blood writing on the wall with Connor close behind.

"Got any ideas about this for me?"

"_Angelus Iussa Letum._" Connor read it out loud, "It's Latin. Literal translation is something along the lines of _'angel at the command of death'. _My guess is whoever wrote it was going for angel of death."

"Bad enough when they want to leave their mark, now their naming themselves. And it's sick, writing it with the victim's blood."

"Murph said ya thought it could be a copy cat murder of some sort over the phone. But as far as I know other than being a fucking jerk that guy wasn't much for a death like this."

"Agent Smecker." An officer came over. "Finally got ID back on this guy. Joseph Clarence Barker. He has a record, multiple arrests for drunken behavior as well as multiple reports filed against him for physical abuse none of which however were fully prosecuted."

"Well, he could fit the bill."

"Aye, but who did it?"

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The water going down the drain was pink with blood. She scrubbed at her hands until the skin was pink and raw. She scrubbed so hard that she caused the cut on her hand to start bleeding again.

She rewrapped her hand and flushed the bloody paper and rags down the toilet. Making sure that her gun was secure in her backpack before exiting the bathroom, she walked down the hallway of the women's shelter to her small room and shoved the bag into the trunk at the end of her bed, locking it with a key that hung around her neck, and all the while trying not to wake the girl sleeping in the other bed. She stripped down to just her underwear and t-shirt and slid between the sheets.


	4. Unfolding Answers

"_Saints and Angels: Boston Vigilantism Reaches New Heights_." Jenny Lucas read the headline out loud as she laid the newspaper down flat on the table. "I'll admit when I heard about the Saints I was all for what they were doing. But now I'm not so sure, especially if we've got copy cats running around. What do you think Sara?" She didn't get an answer. Jenny picked a grape from the bowl of fruit in front of her and threw it at her blond hair companion. "Sara!"

The grape hit Sara in the middle of the forehead and her brown eyes blinked in surprise as she was brought out of her thoughts. "Hey." She picked up the grape that had landed in her lap and threw it back at Jenny who caught it with a laugh.

"Really Sara, where is your mind today?"

"Sorry," Sara yawned. "I got in late night last night."

"So I can see." Jenny leaned across the table and said in a low voice. "You've really got to stop doing that. If Miss Aibe catches you sneaking out and then back in after hours she'll..."

"She'll what? Kick me out onto the street? This is a women's shelter, and I'm a women in need of shelter. She won't kick me out." Sara downed her orange juice and pushed her hair behind her ears.

Jenny shook her head and sighed. "I wouldn't be to certain of that. If she thinks your reckless behavior is putting the rest of us here at risk she just might do it."

"Yeah, well I don't plan on getting caught."

"I'm just saying…"

"Jenny, chill already. I'm an adult. I can take care of myself."

"Then why are you living in a women's shelter?" The words came out of Jenny's mouth without thinking. She blushed. "Sorry."

Sara smirked. "Trust me I don't plan on being here forever. As soon as I can get a decent job and have saved up enough for an apartment I'm out of here." She rubbed the bandage on her right hand.

Jenny saw. "How did you get that?"

Sara pushed her chair back and stood, collecting her lunch dishes as she did so. "None of your business."

"Sara I'm just trying to be your friend."

"Well stop, I didn't ask you to." Sara stepped toward the large kitchen and then paused. She turned back and reached for the paper. "You don't mind do you?" Jenny shook her head and allowed her to take it.

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Back in the privacy of her room Sara locked the door, should anyone decide to come barging in, and sat on her bed with the newspaper in front of her. Her eyes quickly scanned the front page article. "_The Boston Saints have competition… similarities… Latin writing on wall written in victim's blood… Angel of Death… sixth murder of this type since mid February and the beginning of this month…"_

Someone rattled the doorknob. Sara folded up the paper and shoved it under her pillow.

"Sara? Sara Gabriel, open this door please."

Sara unlocked the door and gave the women standing there her most pleasant smile. "Miss Aibe, what a pleasant surprise."

Miss Aibe was a large woman with gray hair and hard gray eyes. She was a woman to be reckoned with. "Enough with the pleasantries Miss Gabriel; we need to talk. Have a seat." Sara sat, Miss Aibe stood with her arms crossed in front of her. "I have been hearing from the other ladies that you have been sneaking out at night. Is this true?"

"Miss Aibe, I would have thought you of all people wouldn't to listen to rumors."

"Miss Gabriel, if I learn that these rumors are true I will have no choice but to ask you to leave. I will not have your self efficient individualism and independence putting the rest of the girls who are staying here at risk."

Sara stood up. "Miss Aibe, I assure you, I would never do anything to put these women at risk. I admit I don't get along with many of them; hell, I don't get along with any of them. But I come from many of the same places that they come from and I would do anything to protect them. And I mean anything."

"I don't doubt that, the same goes for me. But I'm the one running this establishment, and what I say goes. So if I catch you or so much as here about you sneaking out again, you will have to go. "

"Well I'll just have to make sure that I don't get caught." Miss Aibe stared Sara down, who lifted her hands. "I'm kidding."

"Are you Miss Gabriel, are you?" Miss Aibe turned and walked out of the room leaving Sara alone.

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Connor sat at the small kitchen table sorting newspaper clipping into three separate piles. The largest pile consisted of every article printed on the _Saints _in the past year. The two smaller piles were from the last month. The larger of the two was about the _Angel of Death_ while the smallest pile was articles that mentioned both at the same time. He had a beer bottle sitting next to a small spiral bound notebook that had a single page full of nearly illegible handwriting. He took a drag on his cigarette and flicked it into the ash tray. Jamming his pen behind his ear he lifted the notebook and looked over what he had written.

Based on what he had learned from Smecker and had been able to glean from the multiple articles he still had no real idea as to what they were dealing with. "Fuck."

"Still no clue eh?" Murphy wandered in from the bedroom.

"None."

Murphy opened the fridge and pulled out a beer along with a container of leftover Chinese food. He sat down. "I think yer diggin' to deep."

"Oh really."

"Yeah, I mean think about it. What have all the victims had in common up till this point?"

Connor started ticking them off on his fingers. "Male, alcoholics, physically abusive…"

"And never convicted," Murphy finished. "My guess is that whoever it is was physically abused by an alcoholic male at some point in there life and that person got away with it. And now they have taken it upon themsleves to punish those who do the same to others, since they can't, for whatever reason, punsih their actual abuser. And I bet ya it's a female."

"Ya think i haven't already thought of all that. Smecker has thought of all that. It's just too simple."

"Well not everything in life is as complicatedas ya areCon'. And that's the point i'm trying to make here. It's so fucking obvious that ya look right fucking past it." Murphy took a large bite of chinese food. "Quite brilliant when ya think about."

"Fuck, i'll believe that when i see it."

Murphy rolled his eyes. "Personally i'm somewhat gratefull to the bastard. Makes for fewer fucking scumbags that we have to kill. Not to mention it takes away some of the attention that's been focused on us."

"i don't know Murph. If anything it's going to do just the opposite." Connor rubbed the back of his neck. "I mean ya and i are good at what we do. But suppose whoever this is is more like Rocco than like us. A few lucky shots and then... ya know..."

Murphy frowned but had to admit that Connor was right. "Hadn't thought of that."

"We need to figure out who this is and why. That way we can figure out whether or not they are a threat to themselves as well as tous and what we do. I'm not saying that what their doing is bad, fuck if is said that i'd be a fucking hypocrite, but it certainly isn't good for us right now to have them running around."

"We need answers."

"And we need them soon. no way am i going to let them ruin my saint patty's."


	5. Named Faces

McGuinty's was packed. Laughter and singing filled the air as everyone celebrated Saint Patrick 's Day. Mary was running around serving beers and flirting playfully with the male customers. But every free moment that she had was spent with Murphy who was quite pleased with the attention. Even Connor was happy, thoughts of the _Angel of Death_ far from his mind, as he laughed and swapped stories with the other occupants of the bar.

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Sara quietly got out of bed and got dressed. She unlocked her trunk and removed her backpack, double checking to make sure all of the contents were there and accounted for. She opened the door freezing when it squeaked. Her roommate let out a breath of air and rolled over in her sleep. She made her way down the hall to the bathroom. After making sure that there was no one else in there she unlocked the bathroom window and dropped her bag outside, crawling after it. She landed on her hands and knees, waiting for a bout thirty seconds before deciding that it was safe to venture out into the night.

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It was well after midnight before Connor and Murphy finally started home. They had gone about a block when Murphy stopped and began to pat himself all over. Connor looked back over his shoulder. "What the fuck are ya doing?"

"I can't find me wallet." Murphy turned out all his pockets but other than a his lighter and a box of cigarettes his pockets where empty. "Fuck, I must have left it at the bar. I've got to go back. Ya mind?"

Connor turned around and smirked. "Now why would i want to go with ya? I think we both know ya won't be coming back. Ya left yer wallet there on purpose."

Murphy laughed loudly, "Ya know me to well."

"Yer my brother. But if she turns ya down flat don't expect me to wake up just ta let ya in the apartment."

Murphy took a couple steps backwards with his arms flung out. "It's Saint Patty's! No women can resist the Irsih on Saint Patty's day, especially when he's a MacManus." He turned around began to jog back toward the bar

"Saint Patty's was over at midnight ya fool!" Connor called after him.

"Aye, but the effects of the beer last well into the mornin'." Murphy yelled back over his shoulder.

Connor shook his head with a smile and continued the walk home. "Stupid idiot."

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"Please, don't do this. I have a wife and kids..." the man was on his knees begging.

"Shut up you no good piece of shit. You're wife and kids are the reason I'm doing this." Sara placed her gun against his forehead. "You're a no good abusive drunk. But you're not getting away with it any longer."

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Connor turned down the alley that was a short cut to his apartment. As he made his way through the shadows he heard voices. He slowed down and listened.

_"What I tell you in the dark; what I whisper in your ear. Do not be afraid of those who kill the body but cannot kill the soul."_

"Please don't..."

_"Rather, be afraid of the One who can destroy both soul and body in hell, for I am sending you forth to face the burning gates of hell and judgment."_

Connor heard the familiar sound of a gun cocking. He pulled his own and took the couple of steps forward that brought what was happening into his line of sight. "Hold the fuck right there!" He pointed his gun. The man kneeling on the ground flicked his eyes back and forth between Connor and the gun that was pressed to his head. When he looked at Connor there was the tiniest flicker of hope.

"Stay out of this." The voice was barely a whisper.

"I don't think so." Connor moved around so that he could see the would-be shooter. "I not going to sit here and watch an innocent man die."

"Innocent?" the voice asked and gave a harsh laugh. "Innocent men don't go out get drunk and then go home to beat their wife and children."

"Its saint patty's, lots of men go home drunk; it doesn't mean that they are going to beat up anyone."

The shooters face turned into the light and dark brown eyes bore into blue. "I know this man's wife, I know this man's children. I know this man."

Connor faltered. It was the girl from the bar so long ago. He quickly regained his composure. "That doesn't mean that he deserves to die."

"We all deserve to die, some of us sooner than others. But I suspect that you know that already."

Connor narrowed his eyes. "Who are ya?"

Her mouth turned up in a sadistic smile. _"Angelus Iussa Letum." _She squeezed the trigger.

Connor flinched as the gun when off and the man's body toppled over. Only when the girl bent over and reached out her hand toward the blood that was beginning to pool did he react. "Fuck!" He grabbed her by both arms and yanked her backwards. He spun her around and grabbing both her wrists slammed her against the wall. "What the fuck it is wrong with you?" His face was centimeters from her own.

She blinked and he saw something flicker in the depths of her eyes but then it was gone and all he was left staring at was a face void of any emotion. "Get off."

He tightened his hold on her wrists and pushed his body right up against her so she was pinned completely against the wall. "No. Why did you kill him?"

"He was unworthy of life."

"Stop talking in riddles!" Connor yelled at her. He was somewhat satisfied to see her eyes close her eyes and flinch. "Now what gives ya the right to kill these men?"

"The same thing that gives you the right to do what you do. God."

"Don't pretend that ya know me."

"I know you better than you think Connor MacManus."

At the sound of his name off of her lips Connor loosened his hold. "How do ya know my name?

"Saints and Angels travel in close circles."

"I'm serious!" He pushed her even tighter against the wall. "Now answer the God damn fucking question!"

"Your Irish, your walking around South Boston carrying a gun. And your face reminded me of the sketches they show on the news. I took a wild guess. All you did was confirm it."

Connor released his hold and she slumped down to the ground, rubbing her bruised wrists. "What is yer name? And I mean yer real one."

"None of your buisness."

Connor crouched down in front of her and roughly took her chin in his hand. "My patience is wearing thin. Tell me yer name or I swear to God I will strike ya."

"You wouldn't."

"There is a first time for everything."

For the first time hesaw what he thought was fear in her eyes. Her shoulders slumped in defeat. She closed her eyes and took a breath, "Sara," she looked at him. "Sara Gabriel."


	6. Storm A Brewing

"What are you going to do with me?" Sara was sitting on the middle cushion of the battered sofa that sat in the MacManus apartment. Connor was sitting in a chair across from her.

"I haven't decided yet."

"Well we both know you can't turn me in."

"And why can't I?"

"Because I would turn you in with me. Not to mention if you turn me in you're a hypocrite."

"Nah, what I do and what ya do are two very different things."

"Are they really so different. We both kill evil men."

Connor locked his gaze onto Sara's. "Yes, but I don't hunt down only one kind of evil. I eradicate all forms."

"Perhaps, but I destroy those that have sinned against me."

"Ya must get around a lot in order to have seven men sin against ya in just under a month."

Sara narrowed her eyes and sat up straighter. "Don't mock me."

"I'm not mocking ya. I'm simply stating an observation."

"Men."

"So Mary was right."

"Who's Mary and what was she right about?"

"Mary, the women ya helped in the bar. She said ya didn't like men."

"What you weren't able to figure that out on your own? You're not as smart as you look."

Connor frowned but didn't say anything. Instead he stood up and walked over so that he was standing directly in front of her. Despite her serious attitude problem he couldn't help but think that she was extremely attractive. He quickly pushed that thought aside and grabbing her by the arm pulled her to her feet. He steered her toward the door. "Get out."

Sara looked at him in surprise. "You try to stop me, bring me here, and now you're just going to let me go." He didn't say anything. "Well can I at least have my stuff?"

"No." The door shut with a bang.

"Jerk." With that Sara made her way out of the building.

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Connor leaned his head against the door and groaned. Now what? He had found the angel of death, only there was nothing he could do about. Sara was right, he couldn't turn her in, but at the same time he couldn't let her keep doing what she doing. Or could he?

Sighing he went into the bedroom. He'd deal with it in the morning when Murphy got back and the two of them could go see Smecker. Right now he just wanted to sleep.

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Sara stared at the bathroom window. It was closed and locked. "Shit." She had no way back into the women's shelter, and she wouldn't be able to get back in until the doors were unlocked at nine o'clock in the morning, and that was a good six hours away. If Miss Aibe wasn't sure of her sneaking out before she would know for certain now.

There was a low rumbling and it began to rain. Sara tilted her head up as the first drops fell, allowing them to hit her face. In just a matter of minuets it turned into a complete downpour soaking her to the skin

"This night just keeps getting better and better."

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Connor stared up at the ceiling. He couldn't sleep. The thunder and lightning was keeping him awake. And when he did sleep it wasn't much more than a light doze that was plagued with dreams of saints and angles. Saints and angels fighting each other; saints and angels fighting side by side; saint and angles doing things that saints and angels probably shouldn't be doing.

"Fuck." He shifted uncomfortably. He was partly aroused and it wasn't helping his state at all; whether it be physical, mental or otherwise. He dragged himself out of bed. The only way to deal with this problem was a cold shower.

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Meanwhile at the apartment above MacGuinty's Murphy and Mary were lying in bed. Murphy was sitting up against the headboard smoking a cigarette, his arm draped around Mary who was resting against his chest, the sheets resting just above their waists.

Mary traced circles around Murphy's belly button and kissed his chest. "Hmm. This is nice."

Murphy blue out a smoke ring and watched as it faded away. "Aye."

"So what do you think your brother is doing?"

"Who cares." Murphy flicked the cigarette onto the floor and rolled Mary beneath him. "I'm more concerned with what we're doing." He leaned down and kissed Mary who obligingly wrapped her arms around his neck.

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Connor stepped out of the shower only to realize that there weren't any towels. He exited the bathroom and made his way back to the bedroom. A loud banging on the door stopped him in his tracks. He rolled his eyes and changed directions.

"Fuck Murphy, took ya long enough," he called through the door. "How many times did she have to tell ya no before ya gave up and left?" He pulled open the door the grin on his face disappearing.

Sara stood in front of him her clothes soaked. She gave him a once over. "Guess its raining inside as much as it is outside."


	7. Murphy's Law

Connor stood there and just stared at Sara. She raised her eyebrows at him and then stepped past him into the apartment her shoulder brushing his as she did. Connor blinked and shut the door out of habit. He turned and looked at her as she stood in the middle of the room wringing the water out of her hair. He finally found his voice, not that it really mattered. "Ya... wha'... fuck."

"Nice to see you too. Now if you don't mind, could I get some clothes that aren't completely soaked before I catch a cold?" Sara eyes traveled down the length of Connor's body and back up to his face. "I would recommend the same for you."

Connor suddenly remembered that he was still naked and wet from his cold shower. Glowering at the recent bane of his existence He stalked past her into the bedroom slamming the door closed.

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Connor roughly pulled on his jeans and yanked a sweater over his head. He then grabbed a pair of sweats and a t-shirt and went back into the living room. "Here." He pushed them none to gently into Sara's arms. He then stepped back with his arms crossed and looked at her expectantly.

"What?"

"Dry clothes, per yer request."

"So I'm just supposed to change right here in front of you. I can't even dry off?"

"Ya saw me naked. It only seems fair."

Sara saw that he was quiet serious, not to mention angry so she decided not to press the matter. But she could feel her usual composer starting to slip so she turned and faced the other way. She unzipped her hoodie and dropped it on the floor. She crossed her arms and grabbed the hem of her racer back tank only to pause.

"I'm waiting."

She closed her eyes and taking a deep breath pulled her shirt up and over her head. As it fell to the floor she heard Connor suck in a breath of air.

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She wasn't wearing a bra but that wasn't what had caught Connor's attention. He stared at the tattoo that covered her back. A pair of angel wings, done in exquisite detail, sprouted from her shoulder blades and covered the area from her shoulders all the way down to the small of her back.

And then it was gone from his sight covered by the t-shirt that was to big for her. But even though the shirt covered her tattoo it didn't do much to hide her figure, clinging to her wet skin. She then stripped off her jeans and pulled on the sweats in a matter of seconds. She turned around and faced him her arms wrapped protectively in front of her chest.

"I find it strange that ya can kill a man or stare at one naked with no problem, but yer uncomfortable changing in front of one."

Sara frowned. "Didn't your mother teach you to respect women?"

"I only give women the respect they deserve."

"Really, I do the same for men."

"From what I can tell ya treat all men the same."

"Exactly."

Connor rolled his eyes. "I'm going back to bed."

"What about me?"

"What about ya?"

"Where am I supposed to sleep?"

"Ye'll figure something out I'm sure." Connor went into the bedroom and collapsed on his bed. "Fuck Lord. Why are ya doing this ta me?"

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Murphy yawned as he unlocked the door to the apartment and made his way inside. He went into the kitchen and poured himself a much needed cup of coffee from the pot that was on the stove. "Mornin'," he said. He left the room only to reappear moments later.

He stared at the person sitting at the table.

"What?"

"Who the fuck are ya?"

"Sara. Oh by the way, you boys need to do some serious shopping. You have no food. How the heck am I supposed to eat?"

Murphy stared at her for another moment or so before wandering away with a confused look on his face. He went into the bedroom and shoved Connor who was sleeping. "Hey, wake the fuck up."

"Fuck Murph." Connor rubbed his eyes. "What the fuck do ya want?"

"Who the fuck is that in our kitchen?"

Connor closed his eyes and groaned. "Aw fuck, she's still here."

"Still here? Man Con what did ya do last night after I left?" Murphy sat on the edge of the bed.

Connor pointed a finger in the direction of the kitchen. "That girl is the girl from the bar."

"Well that explains why she looks familiar."

"And she is also the _Angelus Iussa Letum_."

Murphy's eyes got big. "Her! No fucking way!"

"I found her last night in an alley just before she put a slug in some guys head."

Murphy got up off the bed and started pacing. "Fuck. Why the hell did ya bring her back here? We need to call Smecker and turn her in. We need to…"

"We can't turn her in Murph."

"Why the fuck not?"

"She'll turn us in if we do. She knows who we are. She figured it out. "

"Aw man…" Murphy stopped pacing. "Well we can't keep her here."

"Ya think I don't know that. I already got rid of her once. She came back though I have no idea why. She obviously doesn't like me, and I can assure ya that the feeling is mutual."

"Fine I'll get rid of her then."

"Please do."

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Sara looked up to find Murphy standing in front of her. "Can I help you?" she asked in a rather bored voice.

"Ya are leaving now."

"Am I now?"

"Yes ya are." Murphy held out her clothing from the night before. "Ya can keep what yer wearing. Now get out."

"And where am I supposed to go? I have no where to go. The one place I could is just going to kick me out when I get there."

"Don't fucking care. And maybe ya should have thought of that before."

Sara stood and glared at him. "And people wonder why I don't like men."

"Yer issues with men started way before ya ever met me or my brother. And as for the men ya kill, they're just the victims of a past that you are to afraid to confront."

_"How the heck does he know that?" _A sudden barrage of emotions washed over Sara's face. And it was clear from the look on Murphy's face that he wasn't just seeing them, he was reading every one.

He smirked. "So my lil' theory is right. The answer is that simple. And here Connor has been looking for some deep hidden agenda on yer part."

Sara's face paled. "And just what theory might that be?"


	8. Chit Chat

Sara's faced paled. No one, not even the women at the shelter knew what had happened to her and here was Connor's brother just barely saying what she had never admitted to. And he was right it really was that simple. But since she never said and no one ever asked people had always assumed it was something much worse than it was. She knew that there were women who had been through worse, much worse, and who had gone on to live normal healthy lives with families of their own. But not her, she couldn't forgive them for what they had done and she never would.

She pointed a shaky finger at Murphy. "You know nothing about me."

"No, but I'm pretty sure I could guess real accurately." He leaned forward and put his hands on the table. "Now for the last time, get out. And this time, don't come back."

Sara grabbed her clothes off the table and headed for the door but was stopped again by the sound of Murphy's voice.

"And one more thing, ya keep doing what ya've been doing and ya'll be the next hit on our list." Murphy came up right behind her and placed his mouth next to her ear. "Because no matter what ya tell yourself, yer just out for revenge."

Sara was unable to stop the shiver that ran through her body. She wanted out of that apartment and she wanted out now.

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As soon as the door closed behind her Connor came out of the bedroom pulling on his coat. "She gone?"

"Aye. Thanks to my powers of persuasion." Murphy dropped down onto the sofa. "Where are ya going?"

"I'm gonna follow her."

"Whatever the fuck for? I just got rid of her 'cuase we wanted her gone."

"I'm well aware of that. But the more we know about her the better."

"Yer mad, ya know that right."

As soon as Connor was outside he was quick to spot Sara making her way down the street at a brisk pace. He made his way after her making sure to stay far enough behind that he could make a swift disappearance should she decide to turn around.

He followed her for a good hour before she stopped in front of a long low building. He watched from across the street as she stared inside the large glass doors. Finally she went in. Once in side a young women came up to her and start waving her arms around in an extremely agitated manner. Sara just stood there and took whatever verbal assault she was under. Next a larger, older woman approached and sent away the younger one, taking Sara by the arm and leading her out of sight in the building.

Connor continued to wait and it was not in vain. Twenty minuets later Sara reappeared, dressed in her own clothes and carrying a large duffel bag.

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Sara shifted the duffel on her shoulder and gave a weary sigh. She was on the street, again, with no place to go. She was out of ideas, and low on cash. "So much for a job and an apartment," she grumbled. And no way was she going to stay at another shelter.

Suddenly she sensed someone was watching her. She looked across the street and found herself staring directly into a pair of piercing blue eyes. "You have got to be kidding me."

She started across the street not even paying attention to the traffic that was going by.

There was a squealing of tires and honking of horns as she stepped onto back onto the sidewalk directly in front of Connor. "For someone who wants me out of their way you seem to be following me."

"I want information."

"You know who I am and what I do. And now you know my former residence." She jerked her thumb over her shoulder. "What's left that you could possibly want or need to know?"

"I want to know why."

"Why? That's the question everyone asks. But does it really matter?"

"It does to me."

Sara laughed. "We both know that is a load of bull."

Connor didn't say anything, he just looked at her. She looked right back. They stood there just looking at the other; completely unaware of the people, who walked by, in a silent battle of wills.

In truth they didn't stand there long but it felt like an eternity to the both of them. Sara finally gave in with a sigh and a roll of her eyes.

"Fine, I'll talk. Then will you leave me alone?"

"Maybe."

"Well I suppose that is better than nothing." She turned and started making her way down the street.

"Where are ya going?"

"This is not a conversation I want to have standing outside in the cold," she said over her shoulder. "I know of a café a few blocks over that serves a decent cup of coffee and excellent apple pie."

Connor was next to her in a moment and they walked the rest of the way in an uncomfortable silence.

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The waitress set down two cups of coffee and slice of pie on the table.

"Thank ya." Connor wrapped his fingers around the mug and took a sip.

"You drink it black?" Sara made a face and reached for the cream and sugar.

Setting the coffee back down Connor looked at her expectantly. However Sara was in no mood to rush things. She drank some coffee and ate a bite of pie, rolling it around in her mouth savoring the flavor.

"This is really good. You sure you don't want any?" She pushed the plate near him and offered him the fork. "No? More for me."

"Yer stallin'."

Sara set the fork down and folded her hands. "Look, I've have never talked to anyone about this. It isn't exactly normal everyday conversation. So I'm sorry if it takes me a little while to build up my nerve so I can tell you, the person who is out to get me."

"I'm not out to get ya."

"Well that's not the impression I got from your brother this morning."

"Why, what did he say?"

"Just that if I didn't stop I'd be the next person on your list of _'good deeds'_."

"He said that?"

"Well not those words exactly, but that is what he meant. So you can see my dilemma."

"My brother is a fucking moron."

"Well i think your both weird."

"Ya said ya were gonna talk. So talk."

"Fine, I'll talk."


	9. Confessions of a Fallen Angel

_My father was a high school football star and my mother was his high school sweetheart. But after my mom discovered that she was pregnant with me the fairytale pretty much ended. _

_They were married right after graduation. And then they went to the university where my dad had gotten a prestigious football scholarship. Things went fairly well at first considering the circumstances. I was born in on December 27, during their winter break. It went downhill from there._

_My mom had to drop out to take care of me, and my dad couldn't handle the pressure of school, football, his part time job, and having to support and take care of a family. He never finished the second semester. He took a job at local factory and moved us into a trailer park. _

_He started drinking when I was about six. His dream was gone and his life a supposed living hell. He wasn't a mean drunk at first. But one night he came home drunker than usual. Mom threatened to kick him out if he didn't start to clean up his act, that he was destroying our family. He yelled back that she had destroyed his life; that she had gotten pregnant on purpose. He called her a selfish bitch and he hit her. _

_He would go to work in the morning with a hangover, after work go out and start drinking all over again, come home fight with my mom and usually end up hitting her. It got to the point where he couldn't hold down a job. Now he was at home a lot just sitting around drinking. The beatings got worse for my mom. _

_On my ninth birthday he yelled at my mom for spending money to make a cake and buy me some small presents; that we couldn't afford it. He was just mad because she had used his beer money to pay for everything. He hit her so hard that she fell and hit her head on the edge of the counter. She died on the way to the hospital. _

_I wasn't a happy kid before but now I was down right miserable. I had no friends and was tormented by the other kids in the trailer park as well as at school. I was afraid of my own father. Still he never touched me. He didn't really pay that much attention to me. _

_Even though I was picked on at school I excelled academically. I actually graduated with a 4.0, not that I was head of my class or anything. I loved English especially. Books were my escape. Shakespeare and Jane Austin were my favorite authors. But that's beside the point. _

_I said my dad never touched me; that was only true until I was sixteen. After I went through puberty I was the spitting image of my mother. It took him a while to realize it but when he did it was as though she had come back to haunt them. No matter how many times I told him, when he was drunk he thought I was her. He would yell, throw things, and then he would beat me. _

_At first I used to fight back. But that only made him madder, so he would beat me harder and longer. So I stopped fighting and just let him hit me until he was done. And as soon as he had passed out in his chair I would pick myself up and tend to my injuries. _

_After I graduated from high school I enrolled in a community college as an English major. I spent as much time as I could at school. If I wasn't in class I was in the library writing my papers or studying. And when I wasn't at school I was working at the diner. I took on as many hours as they would give me, just so I wouldn't have to go home to my father and his drunken wrath. But going home was inevitable. Most night I would get in so late that he would already be passed out and I would then leave again in the morning before he woke up. But there were nights when he was up and waiting for me. _

_He would demand to know where I was and then not believe me when I told him. He would call me a no good whore and beat me. As well as take whatever cash I had on me. Finally I just stopped carrying cash altogether. Opened a bank account, whatever money I made I deposited. I didn't spend much of it. I only ever bought what I needed. And I only ever went to the hospital if it was absolutely necessary. _

_I have had cracked ribs, broken arms, and wrists, sprained ankles, black eyes and whole lot of other injuries that I can't remember. And the worst part was that no one ever said or did anything about it. If they knew they pretended not to, and if they didn't, they simply assumed that I must have done something to deserve it. _

_I was a social outcast. Battered and bruised, used and abused. No one wanted anything to do with me, none of them ever wanted to help. And I hated all of them for it. But not as much as I hated myself for allowing my life keep going the way it was going _

_A month before I was to graduate, I was working the late night shift as the diner when this guy came in. I had seen him around school. He was funny, smart, athletic, popular and from the right side of the tracks. And he was flirting with me. _

_At first I ignored him, brushed him off, but he started showing up at the diner every night. I didn't know what to do. I had never had anyone like me, let alone a guy. Next thing I knew I was falling in love with the guy. Or at least I thought I was, and I thought he loved me back, but what did I know. The only love I had ever felt came from my mom and she was dead and buried. Everything thing else was abuse, contempt, and rejection. _

_This guy actually seemed to care. Now when I wasn't at school or working I was spending time with him. Still it wasn't as much time as I would have liked. He was busy a lot with other stuff though he never said what, but again I just thought that was how it was supposed to be. I had nothing to compare our relationship to other than the one between my parents, so to me it was heaven. _

_After graduation he showed up and told me that he couldn't see me any more that he was leaving. When I asked why he said he was engaged. I couldn't believe it. I asked him what this whole thing had been to him. He told me that he thought that I was hot and that he had hoped to have sex with me but that I wasn't worth the effort any more and he wasn't going to waste his time on something he wasn't going to get. _

_I was livid. I started screaming at him and hitting him. He hit me back and knocked me to the ground. He then pinned me, raped me, and left. _

_That night when I got home exhausted and disheveled my father was waiting and he seemed to know what had happened. Only his take was that I had let it happen and liked it. That night I got the worst beating I had ever received. I lost consciousness. When I came to I was in the intensive care unit of the hospital. _

_Turns out that my father had beat me so hard that he had nearly killed me. Then he had panicked and called 911. Fed them some story about coming home and finding me raped and beaten. They bought it and I was too weak to tell them otherwise. _

_I was in that hospital for two weeks before they decided I was well enough to go home. But my dad never showed to pick me up. So the nurses called me a taxi. _

_When I got to the trailer there was my father passed out drunk like always. I decided I had had enough. I started packing up my things and in the process came across his gun. It was heavy and cold in my hand. As I looked at I though about how easy it would be to kill the man who had made my life a living hell. _

_I almost did to. But as I stood there with the gun pointing as his head as he slept I found that I couldn't do it. Because as much as I hated the man I couldn't kill my own blood. _

_So instead I left, taking the gun with me. I also considered going after the guy who raped my but he had already left and I had no idea where he had gone. _

_There I was ashamed of my own weakness and wanting to punish someone for it. So at that moment I decided that I would swear off all men. They couldn't be trusted. _

_I road buses and hitchhiked. I just wandered around a lot. Took on a couple of odd jobs in places, but I never stayed long. Eventually I ended up here in _ _Boston__. That night you met me in the bar was the night I had arrived. And the guy from the bar was the first guy I killed, and I killed him with my father's gun. _

_The angel of death scenario just sort of created itself inside of me that night. It was as if I had nothing to do with it. So I figured that it was God giving me this power. _

_I figured since I wasn't able to kill my own demons but that I was supposed to destroy the demons of other women like me. So I went to the women's shelter. That's how I chose who to kill. The men would show up wanting to know where their wives were or the women would show up wanting to get away. And from there I would figure out where the men lived or work and then follow them. _

_Once I had them alone I would kill them. I was doing something good for myself and for the women that I met at the shelter._

_Only know I'm not so sure anymore. _


	10. Two's Company

When Sara had first started talking her words had been forced but after a while they came easily. The coffee and pie, sitting in front of her, temporarily forgotten as she gazed just past Connor's head. He knew that her eyes really weren't seeing anything. She was simply lost in the unpleasant memories of her past.

When she spoke of her mother and how she was her spitting image tears formed and fell. She didn't notice. Connor had to resist the urge to reach out and wipe them away with his thumb. Instead he sat there quietly, not moving, save for breathing lest her startle her out of her reverie. But inside he was fuming. He hadn't felt this much anger since the day his father had been shot and killed.

He no longer blamed her for the men she had killed. Rather he blamed her father. And he wanted nothing more than to destroy that which she couldn't. He was rather surprised at this sudden need to protect her. But before he had time to think any harder on it, he realized that she had stopped talking.

She blinked a couple times and took in a deep breath of air, letting it back out slowly. She touched her face and seemed confused when her fingers came back wet. Connor handed her a napkin and she wiped her eyes.

"Didn't even realize I was crying." Her voice had softened and no longer held the harsh undertones of a woman against mankind. Rather she sounded more like a young girl who had seen and experienced more than anyone should in a lifetime. "Now you know." She twisted the napkin in her hands and looked up. "So what are you going to do?"

"Come on." Connor reached into his pocket and took out his wallet. "Yer coming back with me." He stood up and dropped some bills on the table.

"I thought you wanted to get rid of me."

"I did. Now I want to help."

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Sara walked a couple steps behind Connor, her eyes focused on the ground passing beneath her feet. She stopped, switching her duffel to her other shoulder to relieve some of the pressure. A hand came into her line of sight taking it from her. She looked up as Connor slung it over his own head and shoulder so that is rested on his left side. Then he did something that surprised her, he took her left hand into his right and held it.

His hand was rough and warm against hers. And she had to admit that it was a nice sensation. It had been forever since she had felt any form of human touch that wasn't violent. And any gentle touch she had shirked from, to afraid that it would be false.

A cold wind blew by and without even thinking about it she moved closer to Connor and the warmth that he radiated. But he did notice and was unable to stop a small smile from forming on his lips. It was strange how quickly circumstances changed.

One day he and his brother worked at a meat packing plant, the next they were soldiers of God in the battle against evil. One moment Da was there and the next he was gone, his life given for that battle. And now this former thorn in his side was Connor's new charge to care for and to protect.

"_I'm gonna get a fucking earful from Murphy when I get back."_ Connor couldn't help but sigh. And he was supposed to by the more mature of the two brothers, even if neither of them knew who the oldest was. But in the last couple days he had been irritable and indecisive, much to the annoyance of Murphy. Yes he was definitely going to get an earful from his brother.

Murphy always was the more impulsive one. Constantly needing to be doing something, he wasn't exactly patient. He was always jumping to conclusions or doing things without really thinking them through. But he did have his rare moments of clarity and wisdom. Just like Connor had his impulsive moments. But unlike Connor who simply acknowledge Murphy's moments and then moved on, Murphy liked nothing more to berate his brother for doing anything out of character.

As if Sara sensed the thoughts running through Connor's mind she gave his hand a slight squeeze. He sent a glance her way. She really was quite attractive. Her hair was windswept and her cheeks pink from the cold. Her mouth had just the tiniest pout to it as her breath came out in clouds. Her brown eyes were bright and at times sparkled with gold flecks.

If he wasn't who he was and she wasn't who she was, Connor didn't doubt that she would be a girl that he would pursue. But given the circumstances he knew that could never happen.

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Murphy stood in the doorway and just stared at his brother and the girl next to him. He raised his eyes in an unspoken question.

Connor shrugged. "It's what Da would have done."

"Ah fuck it. I can't keep up with ya and all yer switching back and forth." Murphy stepped aside. "Welcome to the MacManus Motel. We take in all kinds."

"Apparently, otherwise your brother would have kicked you out a long time ago." Sara went past him.

Murphy raised his eyebrows and looked at Connor who just grinned. "Do I at least get to know why?"

Connor shrugged and set the duffel down on the floor. "It's up to her if she wants to tell ya. Only then will this all make any sort of sense. I'm still figuring it out myself."

"You tell him. I don't think I can handle it again." Sara faced them both. "But make it the short version. Do you mind if I use your bathroom?"

"Nah, go right ahead. It's that door right there."

"Thank, and I mean for everything." Sara disappeared through the door.

"It's official. I'm confused."

"Ya've always been confused Murph." Connor ducked the fist aimed for his head.

"Shut the fuck up and just tell me what's going on a'ready."

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Sara flushed the toilet and turned both faucets on the sink till the water was just the right temperature. She washed her hands and wiped them on her jeans; she then scooped more water into her hands, splashing it onto her face. She ran her fingers through her hair and then placed her hands on either side of the sink and examined her reflection.

Her face was tired, but she could see something in the depth of her eyes. A brightness, that hadn't been there before, a hope.

She scrunched up her nose, furrowed her brow and just spent a good couple of minuets making faces in the mirror. Once she felt her face was loosened up she tried smiling. But it looked forced.

"Oh well, one thing at a time Sara. You need to earn the right to be happy." She reached into her back pocket and pulled out a hair tie. With practiced ease she put her hair up into an extremely messy bun. "I need a hair cut."

She pulled open the door and went back into the living room. Both brothers were sitting on the sofa head close together talking in low whispers. But as soon as Connor saw her he stood up and approached her.

"How ya feeling?"

Murphy was looking at her with an unreadable look on his face. Sara pursed her lips. "Does he know?"

Connor nodded. "Aye, the gist of it anyways."

"Then why is he looking at me like that?"

"Uh," Connor looked at Murphy then back to Sara. "Like what?"

"I don't know. I'm normally real good about reading facial expressions. And I would expect him to have a look of either pity or anger on his face right about now. But that, I can't read that."

"Murphy maybe ya should answer this one."

"I'm just curious."

"Curious?" Sara narrowed her eyes. "About what?"

"The tattoo on yer back."

Sara turned to Connor. "You told him aboutmy tattoo. Why would you tell him about that? How is that even relevant?" She was a bit annoyed.

Connor held up his hands in defense. "It just kind of slipped in there."

"So, can I see it?" Murphy asked.

"No!" Connor and Sara said at the same time.


	11. Smecker

After a breakfast of leftovers and quiet awkward conversation, Sara had gone into the living room curled up on the end of the sofa and fallen asleep. After everything that had happened in the last 24 hours she was exhausted. Connor leaned against the wall and watched her. When asleep not only did she look ethereal, but there was no sign of the battered young woman, just peaceful innocence. Again Connor felt the anger and the need to protect her building up.

"We need to call Smecker."

Connor turned to Murphy who was also watching her. "We can't."

"I'm not saying turn her in. I'm saying let him know what we now know and that we've found the _Angelus Iussa Letum. _He could help her the way he's been helping us. Besides 'cause of her he's been making us lie low. Fuck, it's been a while since we had a hit. He may have something for us to do now that she is, I don't know, out of the way?"

Murphy was right, again. And Connor was starting to feel cooped up. "Yer right. It's time to remind the Boston fucking scum just who they should fear."

Murphy grinned and hit Connor on the shoulder. "Now that's the Con I fucking know and love. I'll get my coat."

"Hang on. What about Sara?"

"What about her?"

"Smecker is going to want to meet her at some point. But I doubt she would be up for going to a police station right now, so we can't take her with us. But at the same time I'm not sure I want to leave her here alone."

"Ya think she might try something?"

"I don't know. But I'd rather be safe than sorry."

"Well how about ya stay with her and I go see Smecker alone?"

"Nah," Connor shook his head. "I want to talk to him. Would ya stay?"

Murphy shook his head. "I'm no babysitter. And she seems to like ya more than she likes me."

"She doesn't like me."

"Fine, she trusts ya. Twice she has left and come back. Yeah, the second time you brought her here, but she came willingly. So there is a good chance that she'll still be here when we get back."

"Right then lets go."

"Are you sure? Ya don't want to leave her a note or anything?" Murphy was only half joking but Connor just ignored him.

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Sara yawned and stretched her arms above her head. She grimaced as she felt her back pop. Swinging her legs over and onto the floor she stood up, wandering into the kitchen. It was empty. She stuck her head into the bedroom and knocked on the bathroom door. All empty.

"Now where did they go?" She stood with her hands on her hips and looked more closely at her surroundings. The living room had the sofa, two battered and mismatched arm chairs and a coffee table in the corner with a small TV sitting on top of it. The walls were appeared to be white but had so much grime layered on them that she couldn't be sure.

The kitchen had everything a kitchen could need except for decent food. The table was still covered from breakfast. Without really thinking about it Sara started to clean up the mess. She put the dirty dishes into the sink and ran the water over them. She then found a large bag and started putting the garbage into it. It filled up quickly and she tied it off, setting it in the corner. She then tackled the beer bottles that littered the apartment, pouring out the ones that still had beer in the bottom. She rinsed them all out and lined them up in rows on the counter. Lastly she washed the dishes that she had put into the sink and put them away in the cupboards.

She looked around, already the apartment looked better. But she knew that if this apartment was to be truly clean she would have to go out and buy the necessary supplies to do it. She walked over to her duffel and rummaged around until she found her wallet and check book. Looking at her remaining balance she saw that she had just a little over enough. It was the last of her money but this right here was a worthy cause. She put on her coat and gloves and grabbed her backpack which she found thrown in the corner from the previous night.

Her equipment was still inside. She reached down and fingered the handle of her father's gun. Its weight was comfortable in her hand and its grip familiar. It felt right.

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"Murphy, Connor. Over here." Greenly stood up at his desk and waved somewhat frantically.

Both brothers rolled their eyes. Even after all this time Greenly was still clueless They made their way over.

"Hey Greenly, what's up?" Murphy gave him a slap of a handshake.

"Not much. What are you guys doing here?"

"We need to see Smecker. Is he in?" Connor looked around the room for any sign of the agent. He nodded his head at Detectives Dolly and Duffy on the other side of the room

"Yeah, he's in his office, but he's kind of busy at the moment working on that Angel of Death case. Said no one was to disturb him…"

"Don't worry 'bout it." Murphy slapped his back as he moved past him. "He'll want to see us. We've got some information for him."

"But…"

"Thanks." Connor followed his brother. They didn't even bother knocking, just went straight into Smecker's office. He looked up his face angry at being interrupted but it changed to surprise when he saw who it was.

"Oh it's you two."

Murphy grabbed a chair, spun it around, and sat on it backwards, his arms resting on the back. "So how goes it?" Connor took the other seat.

"Fucking terrible. And another body was found early this morning. Crime scene was nearly fucking identical."

Connor shared a look with his brother. "What ya mean by nearly identical?"

"Everything matched but the blood on the wall. Or rather the lack of blood on the wall. Someone stuck their fingers in the blood and there were drops leading to the wall, but nothing on the wall. It would seem that something or someone interrupted and scared them off. But there is also the possibility of a third copycat, in which case this whole thing is totally fucked up!"

"That someone would be me."

Smecker looked sharply at Connor. "You?"

"Aye."

"You mean to tell me you ran into the Angel of Death last night and you are just now telling me?"

"Yeah. We would have been here sooner but we were both kind of busy."

"And just what could be more important that this case?"

"I was, um, busy, with Mary until the wee hours of the morning." Murphy was unable to stop the smirk that was on his mouth, but it disappeared as quickly as it had appeared under Smecker's glare.

"And you?" He was still glaring at Murphy but his question was directed to Connor.

"I was dealing with the angel of death."

"Please tell me that by dealing with you mean lying dead in a ditch with a bullet in his head."

"No, she is still very much alive."

"She?" Smecker's voice actually went up an octave.

"I was just as surprised as you are. Turns out Murphy's little theory was right."

"His whole theory?"

Connor nodded. "And as for her not being dead, well, the situation is complicated. Ya see…"

"Uncomplicated it."

Connor looked up surprised. "What?"

"You heard me."

"We can't kill her." Murphy sat up and clenched his fists.

Smecker folded his hands. "Why not?"

"She a girl. We don't kill women and children. Da didn't do and we aren't going to start doing it."

"Besides," Connor interjected. "Ya haven't even let us finish explaining what's going on."

"Well then, please, enlighten me."

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**Author's Note:**

_To those of you who reviewed and offered advice, thank you so much. My writters block is mostly gone. Keep reviewing, I love hearing that you like it and what you think. This is after all my first fanfic of any kind. Any and all feeback is welcome, even if it is negative, but try to be constructive and not downright mean._

_And sorry if Smecker comes across as harsh. But i figured even though he is helping the brothers that old habits and training from before die hard. And it will make sense later on, I hope._


	12. Hit and Run

Connor quickly filled Smecker in all on the details, pausing only to catch his breath and for Murphy to interject his own comments here and there. At the end of it Smecker leaned back and folded his arms.

"Okay, fine. But where does that leave us? Am I supposed to start covering for her now as well? I'm having enough trouble keeping you guys out of prison. Or have the two of you recruited her into the Saints so that you're a trio again?"

"Actually, I was hoping we could just close the case and leave it at that."

"Just close the case. On what grounds?"

"Well," Murphy looked at his hands. "We hadn't really thought that far ahead."

"She's going to stop. The case will go cold." Connor stood up and walked over to the window. "Wouldn't that be enough to close it?"

"Yes, if the case lay cold long enough that would make grounds to close it. But what makes you so certain she'll stop."

Connor turned back. "After talking to her I got the feeling that she didn't want to do it any more."

"Great. You want me to close the case based on a feeling you have about a young woman you barely know who has been killing the drunken abusers of Boston. Just great."

Both brothers refrained from reminding, Smecker that it was his drunken "feelings" that had led him into the church over a year ago and had resulted in his personal involvement.

"Still," Smecker continued. "I can tell from the looks on your faces that you have already made your decision and that nothing I say will convince you otherwise. So I'll drop it for now. But I at least want her name so that I can do some digging into her background. Alright?"

Connor grabbed a piece of paper and a pen off the desk and scribbled her name down. "Here."

Smecker snatched it out of his hand. "Thank you. Now get out of here. I've got enough fucking paperwork to keep me busy till hell freezes over."

They made their way to the door.

"Connor."

"Yeah?"

"You better be sure about this girl, other wise it will blow up in all our faces." Smecker reached into the bottom drawer of his desk and pulled out a sheet of paper. He balled it up and threw it so it landed by Connor's feet. "And deal with that as well while you're at it."

Connor reached down and picked up the paper, unfolding it as he did so. "Dante Giovanni?" He handed the paper over to Murphy. "Yeah, we'll take care of it.

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"Dante Giovanni, small time mafia boss with his hand in everything from drugs, prostitutes and money laundering." Murphy read aloud off of the paper as they walked along the street. "Accused of multiple ordered killings; never convicted. There's a fucking surprise."

"Keep it down would ya. Ya want all of Boston to know." Connor plucked the paper from his brother's fingers. "His address is listed on the bottom, but other than that there isn't much to go on. We'll have to track him for a couple of day till we can determine a good time to take care of him."

"Reconnaissance; won't that be fucking fun."

"Come one. Let's get back to the apartment already." Connor sped up his pace.

Murphy didn't say anything but he knew his brother wanted to get back to apartment to check on the girl. Still he was unable to keep back his annoyed sigh.

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"Shit." Connor stood in the doorway and stared into the apartment.

"What?" Murphy looked over his shoulder. "I don't see anything."

"Exactly. She's gone. Sara is fucking gone."

Murphy pushed past him into the apartment. "How can ya be sure? Her stuff is still here, she might just be in the bedroom or the bathroom."

"Her duffel is here but her backpack is gone."

"So?"

"Her backpack is where she kept her gun and other stuff."

Realization dawned of Murphy's face. "Fuck. Ya don't think she'd be dumb enough to try anything in broad daylight do ya?"

"I don't know but we've got to find her. And fast. If she makes another hit, I can't keep Smecker away. He's got her name for fucking sakes. Fuck!" Connor slammed his fist on the doorjamb. "Knew I shouldn't have left her here alone. Damn it." He turned around. "Come on."

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Sara walked down the street holding tightly to her three bags. They were just about overflowing with food and cleaning supplies. Enough to last at least a month; she hoped.

She felt one of the bags start to slip and shifted her arm and weight in order to get a better grip. At same time she turned the corner and slammed into someone coming from the opposite direction at a run.

The bags fell spilling their contents and she landed on her butt. "Ow." She rubbed her hip. "Why don't you look where you're going…?" Her voice trailed off as she looked up.

Murphy stood over her, glaring. "Where the fuck have ya been?"

Sara inwardly flinched at having the swearing directed at her. She decided it was better not to answer and getting to her knees began to collect her spilled purchases. But Murphy squatted down in front of her and roughly grabbed her forearm.

"I asked ya a question."

Sara gave him a look. "Shopping; where does it look like I've been?" She pulled her arm away. "Now if you wouldn't mind helping me pick this stuff up, you were the one who ran into me."

Murphy was fuming. Normally he trusted his brother's judgment and was perfectly fine with letting him make the important decisions. But in his mind this girl was turning out to be more trouble than she was worth. He had just spent the last hour running around the neighborhood trying to find her.

He stood up and paced back and forth a bit. "Ya know I'm tempted to leave ya right there."

"Fine, not like I need your help or anything." Sara made a face as she picked up the cartoon of eggs. Not one had survived.

"I'm still not a hundred percent sure why he even brought ya back. I can understand him feeling sorry for ya but getting involved. Fuck, what was he thinking?"

Sara leaned back on her feet. "Is that a rhetorical question? Or do you really expect me to answer that?" She picked up the refilled bags and stood.

Murphy stood in front of her with his arms crossed. "You should consider yer'self lucky. If it had been me coming across ya in that alley I would have shot first and asked questions later, if at all."

Sara gave him a sad look. "Then maybe you should have been the one to find me."


	13. Why She Said That

Murphy blinked, shocked by her reply. "What? Why?" Her sudden change of manner had thrown him off.

"Think about it. Even after knowing what you know about me you still see me as a problem. And maybe you're right. Maybe it would be better if I was dead. Not like I was living much up till now anyway."

She stepped around him and continued down the street. Murphy suddenly felt ashamed. He followed her silently and a few steps behind.

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Connor found them both just before they reached the apartment. It was clear from the look on his face that he was ready to lay into Sara the way Murphy had. But one look at their faces and he knew something had transpired. The air between the two of them was thick with tension. When Sara walked past him and into the building he turned to Murphy to ask, but got a head shake before he could say anything.

The three of them made a rather sad parade up the three flights of stairs. Sara in the lead, Murphy in the middle, and Connor bringing up the rear. Sara stopped outside the door while Murphy unlocked it and held it open for her. She went straight to the kitchen, and Murphy went into the bedroom, slamming the door closed in the process.

Connor couldn't quite decide who to go after first. After a moment he went after Murphy.

He didn't bother to knock, just went straight in. Murphy was sitting on the mattress farthest from the door, removing his shoes. Connor sat on the other mattress and just looked at him, waiting for him to talk.

"She is nearly fucking impossible to understand."

"What happened?"

"Well, when I found her I just started yelling, and don't look at me like that, ya wanted to do the exact same thing when ya saw her outside." Murphy lay back and stared up at the ceiling. "First she was defiant about the whole thing, not in words but with her eyes. Fuck she has expressive eyes. And then she was all defeated."

"Ya said something without thinking again didn't ya?" Connor rolled his eyes. "What did ya say this time?"

"I told her that if it had been me in the alley she would probably be dead right about now."

"Fuck Murph. Now why would ya go and say a stupid fucking thing like that? Bloody hell." Connor stood up and walked a couple of paces and then spun around to face his brother again. "Ya have to apologize to her, before tonight, otherwise I'll beat ya up my fucking self." He went to exit the room. "And as for not being able to understand her, that is something that will have to come with time."

Murphy nodded, rolled over and faced the wall.

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Sara closed the door to the fridge and turned around. She started at the sight of Connor; she hadn't even heard him come into the kitchen. She went over to the table and started pulling out the groceries and putting them away in the cupboards. She was aware of his eyes watching her the entire time. She placed the last of the cleaning supplies in the cupboard under the sink and then flattened the paper grocery bags, placing them in a neat pile on the counter.

When it became obvious that she wasn't going to start talking like Murphy had, Connor decided to break the silence himself. "Ya shouldn't have left the apartment."

"Well maybe you shouldn't have left me alone."

"Ya could have left a note saying where ya had gone."

"So could you. And can you honestly tell me that if I had left a note letting you know where I was that you still wouldn't have come after me?"

"No, but I would have been less worried."

Sara raised her eyebrows. "You were worried?"

"Yer backpack was gone."

Sara nodded her head in understanding. "I see, you weren't worried about me, you were worried I was going to go kill someone in broad daylight. Looks like trust is out of the question for now."

"Trust is something that needs to be earned."

"Your right. But I'm not the one who snuck off to talk with the cops while someone was sleeping."

"How do ya know about that?"

"You just told me."

She had done it again. Made a guess that sounded like a statement just so he could confirm it by asking how she knew. He decided to avoid that topic. "So where is yer gun if ya didn't take it with ya

"Bottom drawer of the dresser in the bedroom, along with the backpack and the rest of it. And don't think I can't tell when a person is trying to change the subject. Why did you go to the police?" She crossed her arms.

Connor sighed. "We went to see our inside man."

"You have an inside man?"

"To see if he could help us out with ya."

"What?" Sara straightened up. "Are you mad? I told you what would happen if you turned me in…"

"We didn't turn ya in. We were trying to convince him to drop the case. But the only way that will work is if you stop killing people long enough for the case to go cold.

Sara narrowed her eyes. "And just how long are we talking about here?"

"Forever would be good."

"Forever?"

"Yes, if so much as one more person dies matching yer M.O. then it is out of my hands and I won't be able to protect ya."

"I don't recall asking for protection. And who would I need protection from? The cops don't know me."

"I had to give them a name."

Sara's eyes got big. "You gave them my name?"

"No, I gave them a name." Connor smirked. "Inside man or not, still have to be careful."

"Then why give them a name at all?"

"To buy time. And if and when they figure it out I'll just tell them that ya lied about yer name."

"So in other word's you get in trouble I get blamed. Oh goody."

"It will all work out. I promise."

"Yes, because it is all working out so well right now." The sarcasm was evident in her voice.

Connor wasn't surprised that she was back to her usual stubborn self. In fact he preferred it. Because when she was defensive and biting with her words he didn't have to worry about the growing attraction that he felt every time he looked at her. "Murphy told me what happened."

Sara's eyes flickered and then were hard again. "No secrets among brothers I see."

"But I don't know what you said to make him get the way he is now."

She stood there and contemplated whether or not to tell him. "After he said what he said I told him that maybe he should have been the one to find me."

Connor jaw dropped. "Why?"

"Some days I wish I was dead. If you're dead, you don't remember, you don't feel, you don't cry and most importantly you don't hurt. And that is all I have ever had. I've got nothing to die for, but I've got even less to live for. So I might as well be dead."

"Ya don't really believe that."

"Yes, I do."

"If ya did believe that you would have taken yer own life a long time ago."

"Excuse me." Sara and Connor looked to the door. Murphy was standing there. "I want to apologize for earlier."

"Apology accepted. You were mad and being honest. I have to respect that."

Murphy looked relieved. "Good."

"Now, what do you guys want for lunch?" Sara turned and opened the fridge, revealing its contents to the boys. Their eyes grew hungry at the sight of the all the food.


	14. Brotherly Love

Sara stepped back and admired her handiwork. After three days the apartment was finally and completely clean. She had even scraped all the pealing paint and wallpaper off, down to the bare walls. It made the whole apartment rather gray, but it was still an improvement.

She turned around and looked at Connor and Murphy who sat exhausted on the sofa. She laughed. "Oh come on, cleaning wasn't that bad." She had put the both of them to work despite their complaints about the apartment being fine just the way it was.

Murphy pointed his finger at her. "Ya women, are evil incarnate."

"I would think that you would appreciate a women's touch around here."

"Believe me I appreciate a women's touch, I just prefer a different kind."

Connor gave a snort, and reaching into his pocket pulled out a packet of cigarettes. He stuck one between his lips and offered one to Murphy. He then pulled out his lighter and lit up his and brothers. He inhaled and blew out a smoke ring. "Well now that this shit hole is less of a shit hole, can we please do something fun?"

"Nope."

"And why the fuck not?" Murphy looked miffed. "I haven't seen Mary or had a decent beer in three days thanks to the like of ya."

"You can see her tomorrow."

"And just why do I have to wait till then?"

Sara reached into her back pocket and pulled out a sheet of paper. She waved it in front of their faces. "This is why."

"What is that?" Connor reached out and snatched it from her fingers. It was the paper they had gotten from Smecker with the information on Dante Giovanni. "Where did you get this?"

"I found it in the pocket of one of you guy's jeans when I did laundry yesterday."

"You did laundry? We have a place to do laundry?"

Connor hit Murphy on the head. "Focus would ya." Murphy frowned and rubbed the now sore spot.

"So back to what I was saying. The two of you aren't going anywhere until you take care of him."

"I feel like I'm back at Smecker's office or worse, at Ma's." Murphy leaned his head back and closed his eyes.

"Well?" Sara crossed her arms.

"Well what?" Connor folded the paper back up.

"What are you going to do?"

Standing up Connor went into the bedroom. "Nothing at the moment. We have to wait till later this evening."

Sara followed after him. "How come?"

"I want to observe for a while and then figure out the best way to deal with him."

"And here I thought you guys just went in guns blazing."

"Not for a long time we haven't." Connor pulled his guns and shoulder holster out of the drawer and placed them on his bed. "We did that the first couple times, but after Roc… well we just do things more careful now."

Sara furrowed her brow. "Who's Roc?"

"A friend." The look on his face said it all.

"Oh, I'm sorry."

"Wasn't yer fault."

"I know; it's just one of those things where you feel like you should say something." She rubbed her arm. "Do you mind me asking what happened?"

Sitting down on the bed Connor began to take apart one of the guns and clean it. Sara sat crossed legged on the floor in front of him. For a moment it didn't seem like he was going to tell her.

"He wasn't cut out for it ya know. But he was so eager that we brought him along. In some way he was useful, for information and such. Other than that he was a complete screw up in everything he did." Connor gave a sad smile. "He was so intent on proving himself that he was more impulsive and thoughtless than Murph. Never should have let him get involved." He set down the first gun and reached for the other. "I mean at least Da knew what he was doing and the risk involved. Fuck, that was why he did it. But Roc, he was in it for the ride, and it killed him."

Sara placed reached out and put her hand on his, causing him to look at her. "It wasn't your fault either."

"I keep telling myself that, but some days it feels like it was."

"I guess that's kind of how I feel on the days I wish I was dead. But we keep going anyways. Because we know that they wouldn't want us to give up."

"Who are 'they'?"

"Roc and your Da, my Mom." She tilted her head and looked up at him. They stared at each other, fingers entwined.

"Hello? I'm fucking bored out here!"

Sara rolled her eyes, and fell back onto her elbows so she could see through the door into the living room. "If you're so bored you can start cooking dinner."

"Ya trying to get us fucking killed?" Connor asked.

"I heard that." Murphy appeared in the doorway. "Can I please go to the bar?" He looked like a dejected puppy.

Sara looked at Connor who nodded. "Fine," she threw her hands up. "We'll go to the bar. Connor can get a beer, Murphy can get turned down by Mary…"

"Hey."

"… and I will beat up all the guys who make passes at me."

"Now why would any guy want to make a pass at ya?"

Murphy didn't have time to react. In seconds Sara was off the floor and tackling him around the knees. The both landed on the floor, a tangle of arms and legs, with a loud thud. The two of them rolled around for a good five minuets before Murphy finally was able to pin her.

"Give up."

"Never." Sara crossed her eyes and stuck out her tongue.

"Fine, then ya can stay right where ya are."

"Then we'll never get to the bar."

Murphy opened his mouth, closed it, and opened it again. "Aw fuck." He let go of her arms and stood up. He left her on the floor and went to grab his coat.

Sara folded her arms behind her head and lay there staring up at the ceiling, a stupid grin on her face. Next thing she knew Connor's face was looking at her upside down.

"Proud of yerself now are ya?"

"Very much so." She stuck her hands in the air. "Up please."

Connor pulled her to her feet. "The two of yas are worse than me and Murph."

"What can I say, you and I talk. Murph and I beat each other up." She grinned. "It's a very loving relationship. Just don't tell Mary."

Murphy came back over. "Don't tell Mary what?"

"About us."

"Us? There is no us."

Sara patted Murphy on the cheek. "You keep telling yourself that. But one day you'll realize that you are hopelessly in love with me."

"I'd sooner turn myself in."

Sara pouted and turned to face Connor. "What about you? You love me right?"

Connor looked past her head at Murphy who was giving him an _'I dare you' _smirk. He looked back down at Sara. "Sure, I love ya. Yer like the sister I never had."

"Oh." Sara's face fell slightly but then she perked back up. She clapped her hands together. "Well then, let's go to the bar."

Murphy looked at her oddly. "Ya know I like you better when yer moody. This whole perky thing is creepy." He took a step back to avoid her hand which flew at him, but needn't have worried. Connor had a firm grasp on the back of her shirt.

"Down girl."


	15. Improvising

"Ow!" Murphy grimaced as the doctor slowly rotated his ankle.

"The ligament isn't torn but it is a sprain." The doctor let go. "You'll have to stay off of it for a few days."

Murphy glared at Sara who stepped behind Connor. Connor rolled his eyes.

When they had reached the bar Mary had accepted Sara, no questions asked, is she remembered her she didn't say,and the two had become friends in a matter of minuets. It was mostly Mary telling stories about the brothers that had Sara nearly falling over in stitches.

And things had gone well from there. That is until some guy did in fact hit on Sara, who turned him down flat, with a punch in the nose. A brawl ensued, in which Connor and Murphy took part in quite happily, but aside from the usual bruises Murphy had ended up twisting his ankle. Consequently he blamed Sara.

Mary stood next to Murphy and rubbed his shoulder. "Stop whining you big baby. You'll be fine."

"But it fucking hurts."

Mary rolled her eyes at Sara who laughed, causing Murphy to glare at her again. She ducked even farther behind Connor.

Connor however had something else on his mind at the moment. Dante Giovanni. Now Murphy's injury certainly wasn't life threatening, but no way was he taking his brother to scout in that condition. It could slow them down considerably should something go wrong, and that wasn't something he wanted to risk. But at the same time he couldn't go alone. He needed some sort of back up. He could wait until Murphy was up to snuff again, but that would take to long, and the longer they took the more annoyed Smecker got waiting. But again, the alone factor popped up. He had no idea what to do. Sara bumped his shoulder.

"Sorry."

He looked at her.

She looked back. "What?"

"Nothing." He shook his head. No he couldn't, could he?

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Sara blew on the window causing it to fog up. She then drew a smiley face with her finger. The radio clock read 12:30 P.M. and she was bored. She glanced over at Connor who was watching one of the houses across the street and to their left. His face was stoic and his gaze unwavering. She rubbed her hands together and blew on them in an effort to warm them up. The car was freezing but they couldn't turn on the engine. Or rather Connor wouldn't turn on the engine. She was curled on the passenger seat, knees to her chest in an effort to contain her body heat. She shot another glance over at the house. It was dead. No movement, no light, if anyone was in there they were no doubt asleep in a warm bed, which was where Sara wanted to be.

She wasn't even real sure why she was even brought along on this so called 'scouting'. They weren't doing anything but sitting and starting, and she didn't think that she had anything to offer. Not to mention that Connor was so adamant about her not doing anything that was remotely linked to her three-days-ago former life. And yet here she was. He had even given her back her gun; cleaned and fully loaded.

And she wasn't a very patient person. When she had been 'working' she had gotten the information she needed went there and hoped for the best. None of this waiting around and scoping out. It was enough to make her crazy. But Connor knew better than she did.

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Out of the corner of his eye Connor saw Sara change positions for the umpteenth time. Her fidgeting was starting to get on his nerves. Yes, it was cold; yes, nothing was really going on, but this is what he and his brother had to do. And he was wishing that it was his brother that he was doing it with. He was starting to regret his decision to bring her along. But there wasn't anything he could do about it now.

"Stop that."

Sara froze with one foot in the process of being moved out from under her body. "What?"

"Stop moving."

"It's cold and my feet are falling asleep. If I don't move I'll turn into a popsicle."

"Then pick a position that doesn't make yer body parts fall asleep."

"And your solution to the cold?"

"Dress warmer next time."

"There's going to be a next time." Sara groaned.

"Shh." Connor held out his hand and leaned forward his eyes searching the street. He could have sworn he just saw something.

"What?"

There is was again. Barely a shadow and coming in their direction. "Fuck." He began to rack his brain for something to do. "Someone is coming this way."

"So?"

Connor turned his head. "So depending on who it is, they might find two people sitting in a car at midnight when it is freezing just a little bit fucking odd."

"Oh." Sara looked nervous now. "So what do we do?"

"I'm thinking." The figure was getting closure, so Connor did the first thing that came to mind. He crawled into the back seat. He grabbed Sara by the shoulder and tugged.

"Connor…?"

"Get back here now," he hissed. Sara obeyed quickly, crawling next to him. The person wasn't much farther away. Connor took Sara by the shoulders and pressed her back down flat on the seat. She opened her mouth to protest but was quickly silenced by Connor covering her body with his, and pressing his mouth against hers.

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As soon as he kissed her Sara just froze. Her body was stiff and unresponsive. Well not totally unresponsive. Her brain was going haywire. This was his brilliant idea to keep from getting caught! And he wasn't just pretending either. He was full on kissing her. It felt kind of nice… NO! Was that his hand? In her hair, cradling her head? Think of something else, anything else… Murphy! Connor's brother… Connor… Connor is kissing me! Oh boy… She had a brief flashback to when she was raped… no, this was nothing like that…

Her body was starting to itch, wanting to kiss him back. It was only natural after all, right… No not right! She refused to let her body give in to something so purely physical. This was Connor for crying out loud. No good could come of it. But man it felt good. No, no, no!

She contemplated pushing him off but then realized that would probably make the situation worse. And bring even more attention on them. So she lay there and just took it.

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Connor was extremely aware of Sara's body beneath his. He had at first only planned on a rather chaste, though long, pressing of the lips. But the minuet he had made contact his body took over. And he was having a hard time trying to keep it from going places it shouldn't be going. It was probably a good thing she wasn't being responsive to his ministrations. It would only make his situation worse. But why wasn't she reacting? She wasn't even fighting him which was what he had expected. She was just laying there, stiff and immobile. Surely he wasn't that repulsive? And even so one could not be completely unaffected by a kiss.

He suddenly realized that he had been kissing her for quite a while now. Connor figured now was as good a time as any to check and see if the coast was clear. Lifting his head he gave a quick scan of their surroundings. It was clear; whoever had walked by was gone. It was most likely some homeless guy or something. But still…

Sara must have sensed that it was over because she suddenly yanked her legs out from under him. He landed rather awkwardly in the small space of floor between the front and back seat. She scrambled to sit up, pushing herself as far back into the corner as her body and the car would allow. She stared at him wide eyed as he pushed himself off the floor and back onto the seat.

Connor let out a breath of air and looked over at Sara. Her gaze had left his face and landed on his lap. He looked down. "Fuck," he murmured. He had an erection, again, thanks to her. He grabbed the car door handle, opened it and stepped out into the freezing cold. He walked in a circles until the cold made it go away.

By this time Sara had crawled back into the front passenger seat. Connor got in and started the engine. Not a word was said on the ride back home.


	16. Conversational Tones

Murphy stumbled into the kitchen on his crutches, dragged out of bed by the smell of fresh coffee and pancakes. "Mornin'." He pulled out the available chair and sat down, leaning his crutches on the edge of the table. Sara set a plate in front of him and he eagerly dug in. It wasn't until he had finished his coffee and Sara went to grab to the pot to top it off that he realized just how quiet the breakfast table was.

"So," he said. "Did the two of ya learn anything last night?"

"No we didn't." Sara poured him more coffee.

"So nothing fucking happened? Sounds like a wasted trip ta me."

"I wouldn't call it wasted." Connor put a rather large bite into his mouth. "I found it rather enlightening," he said after he finished chewing and had swallowed.

"Really." Murphy looked intrigued. "What happened?"

"Nothing of consequence." Sara sat down and gave Connor a pointed look from across the table.

Murphy looked from one to the other. "Right…" The air was suddenly tense. He decided to let the matter of last night drop. But his next topic didn't end up much better. "So what now?"

"We go out again."

Sara stood, clearing all of the dishes, including Connor's, who wasn't even done eating.

He grabbed the wrist attached to the hand holding his plate. "I'm not done yet."

"Well I am." Her voice was low.

Now Murphy was real confused. "Someone please tell me what the fuck is going on!" He was ignored; he had no idea why he felt surprised. It was like he wasn't even in the room in any more.

Sara and Connor stared at each other. She tried to pull her arm away but he just tightened his grip. Instead he pulled her so that she was leaning over and eye to eye. "I said I wasn't done. In fact I think I might even want more."

"Well you can't have any more. The kitchen is closed and it won't be opening again any time soon." Sara gave him a smile that did not reach her eyes. "Now let go, please."

He let go. Slowly, one finger at a time. "I'm not sorry."

"Well I am." Sara left him his plate and walked out of the kitchen. The sound of the front door slamming shut reverberated through the apartment.

"Shut the fuck up Murphy."

"I didn't say a fucking thing."

"No but yer thinking it."

Murphy just sipped his coffee and kept his mouth shut. He had enough injuries already.

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The bar door slammed open causing Mary to look up in surprise. "Oh, hey Sara."

Sara sat on the bar stool and just soaked in the warmth. In her haste to leave the apartment and Connor's infuriating ways she had forgotten her sweatshirt. All she had on was her long sleeve white t-shirt, jeans, and sneakers. Good thing the bar was just a couple blocks away. She was too stubborn to go back and get the only warm piece of clothing that she owned.

"Sara you're freezing. What were you thinking walking all this way without a coat?"

"I don't actually own a coat," Sara answered through her chattering teeth. "And I forgot me sweatshirt."

"You could have gone back for it."

"No I couldn't."

Mary came around from the back of the bar and sat on the stool next to Sara. "Okay, which one was it, and what did he do?"

"Excuse me?" Sara tried to act like she had no idea what Mary was talking about.

"Oh no you don't." Mary turned Sara so they were facing each other. "I've known those guys long enough to know the affect they have on women. Why do you think I kept Murphy at arms length for as long as I did? Would have kept him at arms length longer but it was Saint Patrick's day, I was full of alcohol, and lets just face it, it's very hard to say no to a MacManus." She laughed, but when Sara didn't join in her laughter she sobered up. "Come one tell me. I'm a great listener."

Sara took a deep breath and let it out slowly. "It's Connor. Last night, last night we went 'out'."

"Out as in the kind of 'outings' he and Murphy go on?" Mary frowned.

"Exactly. Only Murphy couldn't go because of his ankle, so Connor made me go."

"And… did something go wrong? Your okay right?"

"No nothing went wrong. Nothing was happening. We were just sitting there watching a sleeping house and freezing to death in the process." Sara cracked her knuckles. "Then Connor saw someone and got worried. Next thing I know he's on top of me kissing me."

"What! Why?"

"I'm not exactly sure. I guess he figured a couple making out in their car in the freezing dead of night was less conspicuous than two people just sitting in their car in the middle of the night."

Mary sat there and just took it in. "So you made out with Connor?"

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"Ya made out with her!" Murphy had finally squeezed it out of Connor.

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"Not really. It was kind of one sided." Sara nibbled on a hangnail.

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Connor rubbed his eyes. "She just kind of lay there."

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"You just sat there? How do you just sit there and let someone make out with you?"

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"She didn't move? At all? How the fuck does that happen?"

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"Mary what little experience I've had with guys on a romantic and physical level, it wasn't at all pleasant. This was no exception."

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"I've fucked things up real good this time."

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"And you guys were all just starting to get along too."

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"She hate's ya. And I don't blame her. I'd hate ya as well."

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"I really can't deal with this right now. My life is screwed up enough as it is. I'm just getting over the whole 'all males are ass holes' thing. And now I feel like I'm right back where I started. I take one step forward and fall two steps back."

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"And the worst part is I'm not sorry. Fuck, I wanted to go farther. I can't look at her and not want her. Damn I've wanted her since that first night in the bar. I wanted her the night I brought her home after the shooting in the alley… There is just something about her."

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Mary and Murphy were both thinking the exact same thing, _"And I thought I had relationship problems."_

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_**Author's note**: I'm glad so many of you liked the previous chapter. It was fun to write. And I love hearing what you think. Every time I get another review I'm like "YAY!" And it keeps me going. So keep them coming!_

_Another thing, hope ya'll like the code talk going on there in the kitchen scene, and that the conversational switching wasn't too hard to follow. But I couldn't just write it as two separate conversations. The whole Sara/Connor thing is too intertwined. I saw it as more like a bunch of clips from a movie or T.V. show that meld into the other so it feels like one conversation. _

_Let me know…_


	17. Hit or Miss

Mary turned around when the apartment door opened revealing Murphy on his crutches. "Hey, can I come in?"

"Sure," Murphy stepped aside letting her into the apartment. He closed the door, gave her a hug and kissed the top of her head.

"So where's Connor?"

"Out."

"He went by himself. Is that safe?"

"It's daytime. He should be fine."

Mary made her way over to the sofa. "I still can't believe he took Sara with him last night."

"So ya heard about that did ya now?" Murphy sat next to her at a slight angle in order to rest his injured ankle on the sofa.

"I heard about the whole thing."

"Same here. So how is Sara, and where is she?"

"She's pissed, and right now she's at my place. And that is actually why I am here. I need to pick up her stuff. I think it would be a good idea for her to spend a couple days with me, maybe more. Give her a couple of days to cool off and so I can convince her to talk to Connor about what happened or at least be in same room with him without wanting to kill him."

"That a good idea. Not so sure how Connor is going to feel about it though. He wasn't in the best of mood when he left and I doubt following Dante around all day is going to help any. Especially if he doesn't come up with any new information that we can use. When things start to take too long he starts to act like Smecker, and one Smecker is bad enough."

"Well we'll deal with that when it comes around." Mary stood up. "Where's her stuff?"

"In the bedroom next to her mattress. And what do ya mean 'we'? Ya aren't going to be here when he gets back."

"You're right." Mary entered the bedroom. "You'll have to deal with it," her voice floated back through the door. She reappeared, caring Sara's large duffel. "I can't believe the three of you share the bedroom."

"It's not like we had anywhere else to put her, and Connor wanted to keep and eye on her. But she had her own mattress and her privacy. We both made sure of it."

"Perhaps, but you still didn't respect her boundaries as well as you should have. Or at least Connor didn't." She held up her hand. "And don't say he did." Murphy shut his mouth and she continued. "I get that he was trying to protect her last night but in doing he has done more damage than good at the moment." Mary leaned over and kissed Murphy and then headed for the door. "I need to get going. I promised Sara I'd take her shopping, that girl needs some new clothes as well as a decent coat."

"Call me later would ya?"

Mary looked at Murphy with a puzzled expression. "Why?"

"When Connor gets back and finds out he might take his anger out on me. Just call to make sure I'm still alive."

Mary laughed. "Will do. Later."

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Connor sat in the far corner of the diner, hiding behind a newspaper. Two booths over was Dante. A tall thin man with a dark skin, black hair slicked back and a pointed faced. He was in the middle of heated discussion with another man, who was shorted, rounder and whole lot uglier. They were speaking in normal voices in Italian. Connor focused his ears and mind on what they were saying, translating easily.

"_I want that stupid son of a bitch taken care of." _Dante slammed his fist down on the table causing the round man to flinch. _"He's taken money from me for the last time. Get him and bring him to the docks tonight. Midnight, pier 6, I want to kill him myself. This will teach him and the rest of those fuckers that when I say pay up I mean pay up now."_

A strange sense of peace settled over Connor when he heard this. It was about damn time.

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"How about this one?" Mary held up another coat. It was beige with brown toggles on the front, two large pockets and a hood. "This one is nice."

Sara looked up from the rack of coats she was sifting through. "No. Not practical enough."

Mary raised her eyebrows. "Practical? It's a coat. All it's supposed to do is keep you warm. And it doesn't hurt that it looks good."

"Here we go. This one is perfect." Sara pulled a coat of the rack and pulled it on. "Warm, comfortable and it won't show the dirt. And it fits."

Mary crossed her arms. "And it looks exactly like the ones Connor and Murphy wear." And it was exactly like the coats the brothers wore, a black wool pea coat that ended just above the thigh. The only difference was that the one Sara had on was fitted, since it was a woman's coat.

"That isn't why I'm choosing it." Sara pulled on the price tag hanging off the sleeve. "It's practical and affordable. See."

"Fine. Whatever." Mary shook her head. "I've just spent the last three hours on my feet shopping. "Let's just buy the stupid coat and go home."

"I thought you liked to shop."

"I do. But not when all you have bought in three hours is a pea coat, two pairs of jeans and nothing but white shirts."

"I like white."

"It's boring."

"No," Sara shook her head. "It's pure."

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"Where is Sara?"

"What, no I've missed ya, how was yer day?" Murphy didn't bother to look up from the television set.

Connor stood in front of him and blocked his view of the soap commercial that was playing. "Where is she?"

"Obviously she isn't here. Now would ya fucking move, ya aren't see through ya know."

"So she hasn't come back since she left this morning?"

"No and she won't be coming back."

"She has to come back," Connor started to take off his coat. "All her stuff is here."

"No it aint."

Connor stopped with one arm still in the sleeve of his coat. "That isn't possible. The only way she couldn't be coming back and the only way her stuff couldn't be here was if she came and got it. But that means she did come back and ya just said she hasn't been here."

"I know, Mary came and got her stuff."

"Fuck. But I need her."

"Yeah, I know ya told me."

"Not like that ya idiot. Dante Giovanni, we've got a shot at him tonight. And I plan on taking it." Connor pulled his coat back on and went to the door.

"Where ya going now?"

"Mary's, I have to get Sara and let her know what's going on."

"They might not even be there. Mary had said something about buying Sara a coat."

"So I'll wait."

Murphy shrugged and turned his attention back to the television.

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Sara stopped at the top of the stairs and stared impassively at the person sitting on the floor by the door. Connor quickly got to his feet. Mary came up behind Sara. When she saw Connor standing there she took the bags that Sara was holding.

"I'll be inside if you need me." Mary gave Sara a comforting squeeze on the shoulder and disappeared into the apartment.

Connor and Sara just looked at each other. Sara crossed her arms and shuffled her feet while Connor rubbed the back of his neck and cleared the back of his throat.

"We need to talk."

"There is nothing to talk about."

"Not about that. I'm here to talk business."

"Business, what sort of business?"

"Dante Giovanni. I know where he's going to be and when. But I need yer help."

"Like you needed help last night."

"Sara…"

"No it's fine. I'll do."

Connor was surprised. "Just like that?"

"Just like that."

"Fine then. But we do this my way. No _Angelus Iussa Letum_. Is that understood? That has to not only stay separate but completely die out."

Sara nodded. "So what now?"

"Be prepared, dress warm and dark clothes." Connor started down the stairs. "I'll pick ya up at ten tonight."


	18. Buisness Partners

"I don't like this." Mary sat on her bed and watched as Sara got ready. "I don't like this at all."

"I don't have a choice."

"Yes you do."

"He's going to go with or without me. At least this way his chances of coming back alive are greater."

"And your chances of getting killed are higher."

Sara sat on the floor and pulled on a pair of black boots. They were one of a few last minuet purchases that she had gone out and bought after Connor had left. The rest had included gloves, a scarf and a turtle neck, all in black. When Mary had seen the new purchases she had shook her head and said, "Well at least the shirt isn't white."

"Besides, you don't even like him right now."

"No, I don't like what he did."

"So you do like him."

"I didn't say that either."

Mary rolled her eyes and fell back on the bed, her red hair forming a halo around her face. "You are confusing." She yawned.

Sara stood back up. "My life is confusing and gets more so everyday." She pulled on her pea coat and gloves and wrapped the scarf around her neck, stuffing the ends inside the collar of her coat. She pulled her hair up and made another messy bun. She really needed to get it cut.

The clock on the wall read nine forty-five. Sara sighed and cracked her knuckles as the minuets seemed to crawl by. Mary had fallen asleep, her breathing steady. Sara made her way into the front room in order not to wake her when Connor arrived. She began to pace nervously.

A quick succession of raps against the door caught her attention. She opened to door. Connor stood there dressed as she was; only he carried a large black duffel bag as well.

"Come on," was all he said before turning to go back down the stairs. Sara followed close behind.

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Connor knelt behind the stack of crates and unzipped the bag. He wordless loaded two guns and handed them to Sara who placed them inside her shoulder holster. The air smelled of garbage and fish. It was eleven thirty and pier 6 was just around the corner.

"Nervous?"

"Should I be?" Sara gave him a cool stare. "I have killed before."

"Aye, but this time they'll be able to shoot back."

"Perhaps, but I'm not the one who needs the backup."

Connor gave her a stern look. "We are each others backup, and don't ya forget that."

The sound of cars stopped their exchange of words. Connor held out his hand telling Sara to stay back and quiet. She crouched down; if Connor had taken the time to look he was would have seen that her eyes had a hungry glint in them. He pressed his back up against the crates and carefully peered around the corner.

There were two cars parked on the dock. One was a beat up blue Toyota Corolla, the other a black Mercedes. From the Corolla three men emerged, one from the driver's seat, two from the back; the driver drew a gun and grabbed the shorter of the two men from the back and shoved him in the direction of the Mercedes. The third man also drew a gun.

Both front doors on the Mercedes opened, Dante emerging from the passengers seat. Dante stood in front of the middle guy from the first car and struck him across the face knocking him to the ground.

Connor turned back to Sara. He leaned forward so that his mouth was next to her ear. "There are five of them," he whispered. "I'm going to go around to the other side and go after them from there. Ya don't come out till their attention is focused on me, alright. That way ya can surprise them from behind."

Sara nodded and pulled her guns back out. As Connor went to move behind her and out of her sight she found her hand reaching out on its own accord and grabbing his sleeve. "Be careful."

"Saints and angels," he replied, causing her to smirk. And then he was gone.

Sara took a deep breath and positioned herself down on one knee. She also peered around the corner. Dante, or at least the man she assumed to be Dante was beating the shit out of some guy while the other three looked on with guns drawn. They weren't paying any attention to their surroundings. _"Morons," _she thought.

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Connor counted to five in his head and then came charging from around the corner. He quickly put a bullet in two of the men and then dove behind a couple of metal barrels. From the number of shots he heard being fired at him he guessed that he had hit both his targets but not caused any permanent damage. "Fuck!" He flinched as a bullet hit the barrel just behind him. He quickly got up and fired a couple more shots. This time he hit one in the shoulder, throwing him off balance and off the dock into the icy water of Boston Harbor, with a satisfying splash. He ducked back down. "Any time Sara…"

Shouts of surprise came from behind him, and the direction of the shots changed direction. Sara had finally decided to get involved. Connor took the opportunity to get back to his feet and start firing at their backs.

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Sara ran sideways firing, forcing the Dante and the last two men to follow her direction and taking their attention away from Connor. She emptied both clips. Now only Dante was left, crouched down behind the car. She let her guns fall down to her sides and took a step forward.

Connor came out from behind the barrels and ran up behind Dante, pressing his gun against the back of his head. "Down on yer knees ya fuck." Dante obeyed spewing out a combination of curses and begs for mercy in Italian. Connor held out the gun in his right hand to Sara who took it pressing it against Dante's head in a similar fashion. It all had to be the same.

Connor said a prayer and then they both plugged Dante in the back of the head. He fell forward; face down onto the ground. Connor rolled him over onto his back with his foot and bending over crossed his arms over his chest. While he did this Sara walked over to the remaining bodies.

"Connor, there are only four bodies all together. What happened to the fifth?"

"Don't worry, he's dead. Fell into the harbor."

Sara walked over to the edge of the dock. She scanned the surface for a floating body but saw nothing. Perhaps it had sunk already. Just to her left was a ladder that led down to the water. She turned back toward Connor and the bodies, not noticing the head that appeared over the ladder. A hand appeared and moved toward her foot.

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A chill settled over Connor and he looked at Sara just in time to see a pair of hands grabbed her ankles.

"Sara, look out!"

She gave a yell as her feet were yanked out from under her and she landed on her back on the edge of the dock and fell off into the water. There was a loud splash as the man Connor had shot into the water pulled himself back onto the dock, wet and bloody. Connor didn't even stop to think; he quickly emptied the last of his bullets into the man's chest and ran to the edge of the dock. "Sara?" He saw her floating face down. He quickly removed his coat and guns, dropping them to the ground and dove in after her.

The water was freezing but he didn't have time to think about that. In a few short strokes he was next to her and turning her face up. He wrapped one arm across her breast and under her shoulders and with his free arm swam back to the dock. In a surge of adrenaline he was able to get her up the ladder and onto the dock.

He gently lay her on the ground and unbuttoned her coat. He pressed his ear to her chest, she wasn't breathing. "Fuck." He put his fist on her chest and gave two quick pushes. He then leaned down and gave her mouth to mouth. Pulling away he pressed on her chest again. "Come on Sara, yer to stubborn to die like this." He went to give her more mouth to mouth but she coughed spitting up water. Connor gently rolled her onto her side. "Yer alright now." He rubbed her back.

Sara rolled back over and gave him a rather weak glare. "You call that dead?"

Connor slid and arm under her shoulder and the other under her knees. "We need to get ya out of these clothes."

"You'd like that wouldn't you." Sara wrapped her arms around his neck and buried her face in his shoulder, to cold to protest much more. Because despite the fact that they were both soaked, he was still radiating heat.


	19. Running Hot and Cold

Connor had changed into a set of spare clothing that he happened to have. He had offered Sara his coat which was still dry but she had refused. Instead Sara sat in the front seat of the car wrapped in only an old musty blanket that Connor had pulled out of the trunk. She reached forward and turned the heater up, the blanket slipping as she did so, revealing her shoulder and the edge of her angle wing tattoo.

Connor allowed himself to stare briefly at the exposed skin before turning his eyes back to the road in front of him. "Ya doing okay?"

"I'm cold, wet, and my back hurts from where I fell and hit it on the edge of the dock, other than that I'm fine." Sara shifted and flinched when the movement caused pain in her lower back. "Damn that hurts; I am going to have some serious bruising."

"Here," Connor pulled the car over to the side of the road. "Let me have a look."

"What? Here, now?"

"Sara, let me look."

"Fine…" Sara twisted around so was facing away from him and loosened her grasp on the blanket so that it pooled around her waist in the back.

Connor cringed, already the lower left side of her back, as well as the side of her hip, was turning a nasty shade of purple. He touched the bruise. Sara stiffened and sucked in a breath of air.

"What are you doing?"

"Trying to see if yer injured under the skin." Connor gently felt the bruise and the area around it. He felt Sara shiver under his touch. "Sorry if my fingers are cold, I'm almost done."

"No," Sara looked at him over her shoulder. "Your hands actually rather warm."

Connor finished prodding but left his hand where it was. He started to trace the lines of the tattoo on her back. "Where did ya get this?"

"At a tattoo parlor, where do you think?"

"I meant when." Connor followed the flow of ink up along her spine. "And why," he added as an afterthought.

"It was on my twenty third birthday last year. When I was little my mom used to call me her angel. I got it to remember her." Sara felt a pool of warmth forming in her belly; it matched the trail of heat that Connor was tracing on her back. She pulled the blanket back up. "That and I was craving pain at the time, some sensation to show myself that I was still alive and not completely numb. A tattoo seemed like a good way to go about it."

"It's beautiful."

"It's a tattoo Connor. Can we go now?" Sara turned so she was facing forward again. "I'd like to get back and get dressed."

Connor started the car again and pulled away from the curb.

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"What is this?" Sara stood in front of the door to Mary's apartment and stared at the note attached to it. "_Murphy showed up after you left, he is staying over. Find yourself other accommodations for the night._ You have got to be kidding me." She tore the note off the door and crumpled it. "Mary I'm going to kill you." Sara looked down and saw her duffel bag sitting next to the door. "Great, she just thought of everything."

She grabbed the bag and made her way down the stairs quickly. Hopefully Connor hadn't left yet. Sara got outside just as Connor was starting to drive away. "Connor, wait!" She dropped the bag on the ground and wave franticly, clutching the blanket to her body with her other hand.

The car stopped and reversed. Connor rolled the window down. "What, ya forget something?"

"No," Sara sighed. "Mary kicked me out."

"Didn't ya just move in this mornin'?"

"Yes I did. But apparently Murphy is up there."

"Ah. Well what do you want me to do about it?"

"Do I have to spell it out for you or something?" Connor just looked at her. Sara groaned. "Fine, can I please stay with you tonight?"

"Does this mean I'm forgiven?"

"Are you sorry?"

"No."

"Then you're not forgiven."

"Then yer not staying with me."

"Fuck you."

"I don't think ya would like that much either."

Sara's face flamed. "You just keep proving my theory right. All men are jerks."

Connor opened the car door and got out forcing Sara to take a step back. "We need to talk about this."

"Talking with you is impossible. Or have you not noticed how well we converse." Sara pulled the blanket even tighter around her body. She needed to get warm and soon otherwise she was going to catch a cold.

"Fine, ya want me to be sorry. I'm sorry. I'm sorry yer mad at me and I'm sorry I made ya uncomfortable. But I'm not sorry for doing what I thought was necessary." He crossed his arms. "Allow me that much and I'll let ya stay the night." He could see the internal battle going on behind Sara's eyes. He could only imagine what she was thinking.

A gust of cold air suddenly blew past, penetrating the blanket. Sara's teeth started to chatter and that did it. "I'll allow that," she murmured giving in to the physical needs of her body rather than her stubborn emotional side.

"Good, now get in the car before ya catch yer death."

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"I suggest ya take a shower first and wash all that harbor water off ya. It will also help ya to warm up." Connor dropped her duffel bag on the floor next to the sofa and disappeared into the bedroom. He reappeared caring a pillow and a couple of blankets which he dropped onto the sofa. "Ya can sleep there."

Sara unzipped her bag and pulled out a small bar of soap and a thing of shampoo. She went into the bath room and turned the water in the shower on full blast. The small bathroom quickly filled with steam. She then turned the temperature of the water down as to not completely scald her skin. Letting go of the blanket she stepped into the shower under the stream of water. It felt wonderful, though it did hurt if the stream hit her bruised back and side dead on.

As soon as she was clean she stepped back out and dried off, dressing in a white tank top and a pair of white scrub bottoms, the kind that nurses wore. She toweled her hair until it was dry and then ran her fingers through it, removing all the tangles. Back in the front room she crawled under the blankets on the sofa and was asleep seconds after her head hit the pillow.

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Connor sat straight up in his bed. He knew immediately what had woken him up, sobs and terrified cries where coming from the other room. He scrambled to his feet and into the living room where he was met with the sight of Sara's body thrashing around on the sofa. He quickly fell to his knees beside her and attempted to grab her arms, but in the process of trying to restrain her she ended up hitting him in the jaw. "Fuck, Sara!" He finally got a hold of her and shook her. "Wake up!"

Her eyes flew opened and she stared at him wide eyed. She looked so scared he half expected her to hit him again, this time intentionally. But what she did do took him completely by surprise. She flung her arms around his neck and buried her face in his chest.

"He was hurting me," she sobbed into his chest, "and he wouldn't stop."

Connor wrapped his arms around her and rubbed her back. "Yer father? He's not here, it was just a dream."

"No," she shook her head. "Andrew. My, my boyfriend."

"The one who raped ya." Connor's hold on her tightened, a little too much. Sara let out a gasp as he squeezed her bruise. He immediately loosened his hold on, but didn't let go.

"He ruined me," Sara whispered. A fresh onslaught of tears began to fall on to Connor's skin. "That's why in the car the other night when you kissed me… it felt… it felt like it was starting all over again."

Connor pulled back forcing her to look at him. "I'm not going to hurt ya." He placed his hand on the side of her face and brushed her tears away with his thumb. "I'm not going to let anyone hurt ya."

"I thought the dreams had stopped a long time ago. But I was wrong." Sara's brown eyes bore into his blue ones. "Make the hurt go away. Make me forget."

Connor gave her a confused look. "How?" Sara kissed the corner of his mouth causing him to jerk back in surprise. "Sara…"

"Please," she begged him. "Show me how love is supposed to feel." She wrapped her arms around his neck and kissed him full on the mouth.


	20. Protected

Connor yawned and stretched his arms above his head, squinting against the sunlight pouring in through the window. He looked at Sara. She was curled up tightly against his side.

He carefully slipped off the sofa and pulled the blanket up over her shoulders, tucking it gently around her body. He placed a chaste kiss on her cheek and brushed a stray strand of hair from her face. With a sigh he recalled the events of the night. He hoped and prayed that he had done the right thing and that Sara would not hate him for it in the end…

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_As soon as she kissed him the second time Connor felt his body respond eagerly. He pulled her tightly against his chest and buried his fingers in her hair, kissing her back. Easing her back onto the sofa he lay partially on top of her, not wanting to crush her with his weight. He ran his tongue along the curve of her bottom lip begging entrance to her mouth. Sara gave it to him, though somewhat hesitantly. Connor ran his tongue over her teeth and then brushed it against her own._

_He let his right hand travel down the smooth line of her neck, across her shoulder and down her arm. Sara in turn let her hands wander across his shoulders and down his back, her fingers tracing heated paths and every single one making Connor even more addicted to her already intoxicating touch._

_Connor placed his hand on her hip and was pushing one knee between her legs when she whimpered so quietly that he barely heard it. He froze and pulled away. Sara looked at him confused. He could see the desire that flooded her eyes, but beyond the desire there was fear. He released his hold on her and sat up, putting his feet back on the floor._

_Sara propped herself up on her elbows. "What's the matter?"_

"_Ya don't want this."_

"_Yes I do."_

"_Not like this ya don't."_

_Hurt flickered across her face but was just as quickly replaced by anger. "So it's okay for you to kiss in the back seat of you car or on the dock…"_

"_That was mouth to mouth, and both times I was trying to protect and save ya."_

"…_but when I want something you push me away? As far I can tell Connor the only person I need to be protected from these days is you. Because where you go I can't help but follow. And when that happens trouble isn't far behind."_

_Connor closed his eyes and took a deep breath. "We've had a rough night, the both of us alright. And right now ya especially are tired, scared and confused." He looked at her again. "It's not that I don't want ya. But if we do this ya will hate me forever and I don't want that."_

"_And why should I believe you?"_

"_Because sex isn't love Sara." The force of his voice and the conviction that was behind his words gave Sara pause. "And only love can wipe out those painful memories. I sleep with you tonight and I will only make it worse." He made to stand but she grabbed his arm. "Sara…"_

"_Don't Connor." She looked tired again. "Just stay, please."_

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And he had. At first he had only intended to stay until she fell back asleep. But the warmth of her body and the steady sound of her breathing had lulled him into his own slumber.

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Sara rolled over only to find the protective warmth of Connor gone. She sat up and blinked, running her hands across her weary face. Her brain felt extremely foggy. She couldn't quite remember everything that had happened.

She remembered dreaming about her rape, something that hadn't happened in months. She vaguely recalled hitting Connor in the face, though she couldn't be certain that that wasn't more dreaming. One thing she was certain of was the way she had thrown herself at him as he had tried to comfort her. She blushed as she thought of the shameless way she had acted. And to think she had been yelling at him for really kissing her in a rather fake situation just the day before. She pulled her knees up to her chest and rested her arms and forehead on them. "My life is so fucked up."

She recalled acutely how his mouth had felt and how his body had been reacting to the close proximity of hers, which is why it had surprised her when he had shoved her away. At first she had been hurt, who was he to reject her advances when it was obvious that he wanted her. She had yelled at him again, accused him of toying with her emotions and for being a selfish bastard. Once she had finished ranting he had calmly explained that it wasn't' that he didn't want her, it just wasn't a good idea given the circumstances. That she was tired and emotional, and obviously not thinking straight. And they were already on rocky ground with their relationship, whatever it was, and he wasn't going to do anything to make it worse, at least not if he could help it.

But he had promised to stay with her till she fell asleep again. Sara ran her finger over her lips. If that was what it could feel like without love, what did it feel like with?

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_**Author's Note: **I am just on an updating roll here. But what can I say, I've got a week off from school, everybody has left, not much else to do but write. Aren't you a bunch of lucky readers!_

_Hope you enjoyed the chapter. Bit of a teaser…it is so tempting to want to resolve the whole Connor/Sara thing and have a happy ending. But that would be a cop out. Sides, they've know each other altogether for less than a week. And I am trying to be realistic. But at least now Sara can't deny there is chemistry between them. The only question left is whether or not it is good or bad… dum da dum dum… and don't worry, Smecker will be back. I don't like writing him as much, but I can't avoid the man forever. _


	21. Meddle of Honor

Mary leaned over Murphy's sleeping form so that her hair tickled his face. Murphy wrinkled his nose and sleepily swiped at her. She pulled back and stifled her laugh. This time she placed her hand on his stomach and moved it down under the covers. She shrieked when a hand grabbed her wrist.

"That isn't very nice." Murphy's blue eyes twinkled mischievously at her.

"You didn't seem to mind it last nigh," Mary countered while attempting to pry his fingers off with her free hand.

"Aye. But I wasn't half asleep last night."

"Well how else was I supposed to wake you up?"

Murphy caught Mary's other wrist. "I can think of better ways." He pulled her down against him and kissed her. A loud pounding on the front door was heard. He let her go with a groan. "Fuck them and their terrible timing."

Mary did her customary eye roll and grabbed her robe from the end of the bed. She ran her fingers through her curls as she walked out into the living room in a vain attempt to tame them. "Might as well get up Murph." She grinned at the string of mumbles and curses in various languages that reached her ears.

She peered through the peephole, but didn't see anyone. "That's odd." She turned away. "Maybe it was the neighbors." The pounding came again. Mary stepped away from the door and into Murphy's chest.

"What's wrong?"

Mary pointed at the door. "Someone is knocking, but I can't see anyone."

Murphy pursed his lips and furrowed his brow. "Stay behind me." He took the crutch from under his arm and held it around the middle. With his other hand he reached for the door knob and jerked it open. He blinked in surprise at Sara.

She looked at the crutch in his hand and grinned. "Didn't realize I was that much of a threat."

"Sara, what? I couldn't see you through the peephole." Mary pushed Murphy's arm down which was still up in the air in a defensive position.

"Sorry, I was standing off to the side." Sara entered the apartment and set her bag on the floor.

"So your back." Mary crossed her arms.

"What? Did you think you could kick me out after one day, force me to stay the night at Connor's and have everything turn out perfectly okay? Nice try."

"That wasn't my intention at all!"

"So how did it go?"

Sara turned to Murphy. "How did what go? The hit or Mary's sad attempt to force a peace?"

"Both." Murphy gave a grunt as Mary elbowed him in the ribs. "Fuck Mary, that hurt."

"Baby."

Sara smirked. "I thought as much. Anyways the hit itself went fine. Dante Giovanni, along with four other lowlifes, is no longer walking the streets of Boston. The city is safe again."

"I'm guessing you and Connor didn't make up since you are here with your stuff."

"Actually this is Murphy's stuff."

"My stuff?"

"Yes Murphy, your stuff. Since you seem to want to spend so much time here Connor and I decided that you should just stay. And I'll move back in with Connor."

"So you and Connor did make up?" Mary was confused now.

Sara shook her head. "I'm sorry, but we have also decided that that information is classified. And this way the two of you can't meddle in our lives. We will deal with each other and our issues when we decide to and if we decide to. Assuming we don't drive each other so crazy that we want to kill the other." She clapped her hands together. "Well not that that is settled I'm going to be on my way. Have fun." She went out the door and closed it.

Mary looked at Murphy. "Now I have to live with you? I like you Murphy, but if I had seen this coming I never would have locked her out."

"Hey."

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"Did ya do it?"

Sara slid into the passenger seat and put on her seatbelt. "Yup. That will teach them to meddle."

"Still don't think Murphy had anything to do with it."

"Sacrifices must be made. Now drive Connor."

"So does this mean we are okay?" Connor threw a side glance at Sara.

"I wouldn't call it okay. But we definitely aren't as bad as we were yesterday."

"So Mary's meddling, assuming that she was meddling, worked."

"I guess, but don't let her know that."

Connor started the car and put it into gear. "So what now?"

"Police station."

"Police station?" Connor looked at Sara incredulously. "What the fuck for?"

"I thinks it time I met your inside man, let him know what's going on"

"Ya sure."

"Positive. Besides _Angelus Iussa Letum _died days ago and was resurrected as a saint."

"I never said ya was a fucking Saint Sara."

"But you never said I wasn't either. I'm involved now, even more so than before." She crossed her arms behind her head. "Saint Sara. I rather like the sound of that."

"This is royally fucked up," Connor grumbled as he pulled into the street.

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Sara looked up at the cold walls and windows of the precinct. The building itself wasn't really that imposing, but what it represented and what it could do to her should she ever get caught on its bad side was. She swallowed.

"Not having second thoughts now are ya?"

"Course not." She looked at Connor who was calmly smoking a cigarette. "So this cop, I can trust him?"

"Sure," Connor dropped the cigarette on the ground and ground it out with his shoe before making his way up the stairs to the door. "Only he isn't a cop." He held the door open for Sara who was right behind him. "He a federal agent."

"What?" Sara stopped just inside the door.

Connor pushed her the rest of the way inside. "Come on. We don't want to keep him waiting."

"He doesn't even know we're coming."

"True, but why avoid the inevitable."

"Okay. Now I'm having second thoughts."

Connor had to grab her arm in order to keep her from walking back out to the street. "Sara ya made me drive the fuck all the way out here. So yer gonna see him. End of discussion."

Keeping a firm hold on her arm he steered her past the desk and the people sitting at them. Sara kept her focused on the floor in order to avoid the curious gazes that were being directed at them. Or rather her, the woman in Connor's grasp.

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Smecker looked at the young woman sitting in front of him. She fidgeted under his gaze and averted her brown eyes to anywhere else in the room. Only when Connor set his hand on her shoulder did she seem to relax.

Smecker leaned forward in his chair, placed his elbows on the desk, linked his fingers together and rested his chin on his hands. "So," he said. "Yer the one who's been causing me so much trouble. I must confess I was expecting someone less attractive."

"Really…" Sara bit back her retort at the warning squeeze she received from Connor. She flicked her eyes over to his hand on her shoulder. It was rather hard to concentrate when he was touching her. She shrugged him off.

"You've put me in a rather difficult situation here Connor."

"_You put yourself in a difficult situation,"_ Sara thought to herself.

"You had me wasting precious tax dollars on that false name you gave me to run with. However, since she is obviously helping you while Murphy is currently unavailable I have no choice but to let the whole thing go." Smecker directed his attention back to Sara. "But I'm warning you young lady."

"_Lady? Ha." _Sara frowned at Connor who had snorted, no doubt agreeing with her thoughts.

"Any hit from you that doesn't fall under Connor and Murphy's reach and you have me to look out for. Is that understood?"

Sara nodded. "Yes sir, Agent Smecker sir."

Connor had to fake a coughing fit to cover his laughter. It was obvious from the look on Smecker's face that he didn't know whether or not she was being serious or mocking him.


	22. Change of Pace

The last week of March flew past and into April. A downpour of April showers slowly made the city of Boston less gray, trees started to blossom, drop their flowers and sprout fresh green leaves, while flowers poked their heads out of the dirt. Days grew warmer and brighter. By the end of April coats were no longer necessary.

By the time May rolled around Sara's life, for the first time in years, felt settled. She had found a job working at a small privately owned bookstore during the day, and in the evenings she helped Mary out at the bar. But most of the money that she 'earned' came from the bill fold and wallets of the men she killed along side Connor and Murphy. She had become a permanent addition. Once again the Saints were a trio.

The _Angelus Iussa Letum_ had, as promised, died out. But on occasion she would find herself saying her monologue just before she killed some of the men. Connor and Murphy allowed that, it was to her as their prayer was to them. A reminder of what they stood and fought for.

Murphy had moved back into the MacManus apartment just after one week of living with Mary. They were still together but they both agreed that living with each other just wasn't working. Murphy was just too messy for Mary's small and organized apartment.

Sara had started to refurnish the apartment. At first Connor and Murphy had protested, claiming that if they should suddenly have to move or get out of town that they wouldn't be able to take any of it with them. She had argued that it didn't matter how long they were going to be there, she wanted it to feel like home.

The first thing she had done was to go out and buy a single and a bunk bed. Connor had just raised his eyes at the bunk bed while Murphy had quickly claimed the top bunk. Which in the end turned out quite funny because the first morning when he got up he forget that he was on the top, having been so used to sleeping on a single mattress on the floor, and fallen off with a loud bang. Letting out a rather pleasant stream of curses in the process.

Sara and Connor got along but there was still some tension. It was a silent agreement not to talk about what had and almost had transpired in the first few days they had known each other. They were Saints first, friends second, and nothing more.

But it was getting harder to keep it that way. Living in such close proximity and being what they both were and doing what they did had formed a rather unique bond between the two of them. And while they individually acknowledge that it was in fact there buried in the subconscious, neither one would admit it to the other.

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It was Friday night and the bar was full. Sara dodged another pair of groping hands and squeezed between Connor and Murphy at the bar. She set down her tray and leaned over the bar grabbing a bottle of alcohol and some shot glasses from beneath. Only she leaned too far and couldn't get back up. "Um, a little help would be nice."

Connor grabbed her by the waist and pulled her back. "Ya know ya could just wait for Mary to get those next time."

"In case you haven't noticed, we're both really busy at the moment. And this was faster than trying to work my way behind the bar." Sara began pouring the drinks, swatting away Murphy's hand when he tried to steal one. "Hey, wait your turn. And anyways these are for the paying customers."

"I fucking pay," Murphy said indignant.

Sara picked the tray, fully loaded with drinks now, back up. "According to Mary, your tab is so high she's thinking of withholding all sex until you pay up." She made her way back into the throng of patrons leaving Connor's laughter and Murphy's protests behind. With practiced ease she avoided the bumps and jostles and set the tray down on the table. "Here you go boys." She handed out the drinks and reached for the cash in the middle of the table. "Will that be everything or would you like something else?"

"How about a lap dance?" They all laughed.

Sara raised her eyebrows and her eyes went dark, but she kept a smile on her face. "This bar guys, not a strip joint." She put the money in the front pocket of her apron and turned to leave.

Instead she found herself pulled into the lap of the man sitting on the edge of the booth.

"Come on now lil' missy. We were just joshing you. But seriously how about joining us for a drink?"

"I appreciate the offer." Sara attempted to pry his hands off. "But I am working at the moment."

"Well what about when you are done working."

Sara rolled her eyes. _"Is it just me or are they more persistent when they are drunk?" _The smell of alcohol was evident on the man's breath. She wrinkled her nose. "Sorry, but I'm scheduled to close up tonight."

"I can wait." There was more laughter from around the table. The man attempted to nuzzle her neck.

Sara felt herself getting angry and wanted nothing more than to punch the guy in the face, only she was facing the wrong way and even if she hadn't been Mary was adamant about Sara not starting fights. Avoid certain customers if needed, but always be pleasant. And if a situation did get out of hand let one of the male regulars that Mary was friends with deal with it.

Unfortunately none of those male regulars were in sight at the moment. And even if they had been the bar was so crowded and noisy there was no guarantee that they could see or hear her in her current predicament.

The man's hands began to inch upwards. Sara batted them away. "I would appreciate you letting me go and getting back to work."

"Stop playing hard to get."

"I'm not playing hard to get, I'm just not interested. Besides I don't think my boyfriend will like this very much."

"Boyfriend?"

"Yes, in fact he's right over there." Sara pointed at the first male who at that second appeared in her sight. It just so happened to be Murphy.

The guy laughed. "Nice try, I know for a fact that he's screwing the owner of this joint on a regular basis."

Just the Sara saw Connor behind him and thought fast. "I'm pointing to the guy behind him." _"Come on Connor, look at me!"_

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Connor downed the last of his beer. He frowned when Murphy nudged him in the side with his elbow. "Watch it would ya. Ya trying to make me fucking choke?"

"I think Sara's just gone and made a new friend."

"What the fuck are ya on about?" Connor turned and looked where Murphy pointed. His eyes widened slightly at the sight of Sara sitting rather snugly on some guys lap. "I wonder what all that's about."

The rather pained looked on Sara's face suddenly changed to one of happiness when she saw Connor looking at her. She gave him an enticing smile and waved him over. Curiosity getting the best him Connor made his way over.

Once he was there Sara tried to stand but was still held firmly in place by the arms around her lap. "Connor, babe…"

"_babe?" _Connor and Sara thought the same thing.

"Perhaps you can convince this nice young man that I'm not interested and need to get back to work."

"And why can't ya do that yerself?"

Sara gave him a look. "Because," she said in an extremely sweet voice. "Mary doesn't like me starting fights. And you're my boyfriend who is supposed to protect me from the unwanted advances of other men." She put emphasis on the word boyfriend.

Connor instantly understood what was going on. He frowned but on the inside he was smirking, no doubt this was killing Sara having to ask for help to get out of this situation, especially from him.

"Well ya heard my girl. Let her go." Connor rolled his fingers into fists and cracked his knuckles. The motion made the muscles in his arms flex ever so slightly.

The guy loosened his grasp and Sara literally jumped to her feet. "Thanks babe." She went to make a quick getaway. Unfortunately the guy in the booth wasn't satisfied.

"Hold it. You say you're her boyfriend."

Connor crossed his arms. "Aye."

"Then prove it."

"Prove it? There is nothing to prove. We're dating end of story."

"Yeah," Sara interjected. "We even live together." That part was true.

"That don't mean a thing."

"Then just how would ya have us prove it to ya?"

The guy shared a look with his friends and gave a sadistic grin. "Kiss her. And I don't mean some peck on the lips. I mean a real honest to goodness kiss, with tongue."

Connor place sboth hands on the table and said in a low voice. "I know getting rejected by a girl is an unpleasant experience, not to mention embarrassing when it happens in front of yer friends. But I ain't going to kiss her just so ya can get some sick pleasure out of watching." But in the back of his mind the idea of kissing her was tempting, but he knew if he did that Sara's reaction could only make the whole situation worse.

The guys stood up. "You know what. I think your lying. You aren't really dating her. Now I don't like being rejected and I really don't like being lied to."

It looked like this situation was about to come to blows. Connor scanned the bar, but Murphy was no where in sight. Neither was Mary for that matter. _"Murphy now is not the fucking time to disappear for a quickie." _**Authors note: unintentional pun. lol.**

But before anyone could throw a punch Sara stepped between them. "You want proof fine then. Here's your proof." Turning to face Connor she put her hand behind his neck and pulled his face down to hers. She kissed him, hard. Her fingers buried in his hair, mussing it up even more and her tongue entered his mouth.

Connor's shock lasted for a split second. The kiss might have only been for show, but there was no way in hell he was letting this opportunity go to waste. He quickly wrapped one around her waist pulling her flush against him; with the other he supported her head while caressing her jaw line with his thumb.

Her lips were soft and the inside of her mouth warm. Connor poured nearly a month worth of pent up sexual tension into that kiss. He didn't want it end. Unfortunately it had to, against the protests of his body.

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When the guy had demanded that Connor kiss her as proof of their relationship Sara had worried that he would take him up on that demand. Instead Connor had defended her honor, sort of. But when the guy had stood up ready to start something Sara decided they didn't have a choice. She had quickly stepped between them and kissed Connor before she lost her nerve.

The second her lips made contact with her every sense came alive and her body temperature went up. And when his tongue intermingled with hers she felt her knees go weak. Thankfully Connor had his arm around her holding her tight; otherwise she wasn't sure she would have stayed standing.

It felt like the kiss lasted an eternity, and it was nowhere near long enough. She pulled away to the sound of wolf whistles and catcalls from throughout the bar.

Left rather breathless she saw that Connor had a rather bemused expression on his face. She felt her face flush. It was obvious the kiss had had an interesting effect on him as well. She felt his hold on her relax but not let go. "Satisfied?" She managed to get out not looking away from Connor's face.

The guy grumbled and sat back down, his friends now laughing at him.

"I know I am."

Sara looked at Connor and ducked her head back down. Her hands were resting on his arms. "I need to get back to work now."

He let go and she walked back over to the bar where both Murphy and Mary were, having returned from wherever it was that they were. It was obvious from the look on their faces that they had seen the kiss but Sara barely glanced at them. "Not a word."

They both closed their mouths, as curious as they were they both knew better than to meddle.

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**Author's Note: **_that was fun to write. Hmm, this relationship is just one big rollercoaster. I could keep this up forever if i really wanted to. But that would just be mean. Still this story has a long way to go before it ends. In fact I've already got the next chapter writing itself in my brain. Better go type it. Remember, read and review. The more reviews i get the better! And I really like them when they area little longer than just one line, one liners are still cool though, it's just the longers ones give me more insight into what you think and expect. thanks guys._


	23. Heartfelt

Sara cleared the glasses and bottles off of the table and wiped it down with a cloth. The last patron of the bar having left just minuets before. Mary had already left with Murphy to go upstairs and Connor was sitting at the bar waiting to Sara to finish clearing before locking up.

Sara washed the last of the glasses and put them away. She tied off the garbage bag. "Do you mind taking that out back for me?"

"Not at all." Connor grabbed the bag and disappeared through the back door. "That everything?" he asked on his return, brushing his hands on his jeans.

"Just have to wipe down the bar and then I'm done." She did this quickly and then turned off the lights. Once they were both outside she locked the door and slid the key into her pocket.

Connor made to turn down the sidewalk in the direction of the apartment but stopped when he realized that Sara wasn't following. "Something wrong?"

"No," Sara shook her head. "I'm just not ready to go back yet." She put her hands in the back pockets of her jeans and rocked back on her heels. "Side's it such a nice night. Seems like a waste to go home so soon."

"Alright. What did ya have in mind?"

"I don't know. How about a walk in the park?"

"Okay. Let's go to the park." Connor held out his hand.

After a moments hesitation Sara took it. They walked the couple blocks to the park that way. But once they got there Sara let go and walk a little ways ahead of him. She headed towards a play area and the swings. Sitting down she pushed off with her feet.

Connor leaned against the pole and just watched her for a bit. Finally he decided to break the silence. "Sara, about earlier."

Sara halted her swinging. "Earlier?"

"The," Connor searched his brain for the right word, "incident, with the guy in the bar."

"Right." Sara bit her lip. "We're even now." She began to swing again.

"Wait a minuet." Connor grabbed the swing forcing her to stop. "What do ya mean we're even?"

"The car thing from last month, and now this. We have both kissed the other to save their life. We're even."

"Sara…"

"Connor let it go. It was just a kiss."

Connor kneeled down in the dirt so that he was looking up Sara. "That is a lie and ya know it."

Sara tilted her head. "Connor, don't do this. Don't ruin this. Things are finally starting to work out."

"Well maybe ya should have thought of that before ya kissed me the way ya did."

"I kissed you the way I did to make it believable. Okay. Why are you making such a big deal?"

"I would think it's pretty fucking obvious why I'm making a big deal. Fuck Sara." Connor stood up angrily and walked a few paces away. He turned back. "We've got a fucking connection. Ya felt the fucking exact same thing I did during that kiss."

"You're not me Connor. You don't know what I felt."

Connor came back and stood in front of her. "No," he pulled her to her feet. "But I do have a pretty good idea." He took her face in his hands and pressed his mouth against hers.

Sara pushed him off. "Stop it." She glared at him. "Stop forcing yourself on me."

"So what? I can't kiss you but ya can fucking kiss me whenever ya want is that it?"

"No."

"Then what the fuck is it?"

"You scare me." It was barely a whisper. Sara sunk back down onto the swing.

The anger drained from Connor's face. "What?" He sat down on the swing next to her.

"You scare me." She ran her fingers through her hair and turned her brown eyes so that they looked directly into his blue ones. "When I'm around you, I feel safe, safer than I have ever felt. You're very presence makes me feel warm. Hell your touch sets me on fire. And I know I have a similar effect on you."

"I'm sensing a 'but'."

"But, before you, and Murph, the only men in my life have ever hurt me."

"I told ya before I'm not gonna hurt ya. I've been protecting ya. I've been protecting ya from me even."

"When have you protected me from you?"

"Tonight in the bar I was trying to resolve the problem without kissing ya when ya kissed me. And that night when ya threw yerself at me after yer nightmare. I told ya no."

"And what about just now." Sara touched her bruised lip.

"Okay, that I shouldn't have done. But I was trying to make a point that there is something between us."

"I know there is something between us."

Connor pulled her swing closer to his and twisted it so they were facing each other. "Then why not just let it be?"

"Because we can't be together. Not like that."

"Yer fucking killing me Sara." Connor groaned and rested his head against the cool metal chain that held the swing

"It would be a conflict of interests."

"It's already a fucking conflict of interests Sara. Our conflicting interests in each other and the fucking fact that ya don't want to do anything about it."

"Connor we're no good for each other. If we were to get together it could destroy us both. What we are, what we do. You need to find yourself someone who isn't involved as deeply as I am. You need to find someone more like Mary…"

"I don't want someone like Mary," Connor interrupted. "I'm not in love with someone like Mary."

"Oh God."

"I'm in love with you."

And the heavens opened up and rained down on them both.

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Sara ran as fast as she could through the rain. She had to get away; she didn't want to believe that she had heard what she had just heard. She had worked so hard to keep him at arms length only to fail miserably. She could recall what Mary had once told her, _"It's very hard to say no to a MacManus."_ Partners, yes; friends, fine; but this, it could never be this. But with five little words Connor had shot it all to hell.

Her hair was plastered to her forehead, her shirt clung to her skin, and her jeans were splattered with mud. Her clean white sneakers were no longer clean and white. They were dirty, which was how she felt. Strange how words meant to bring joy and rapture only made her feel unclean.

Her lungs were burning for air but she couldn't stop. Not until she had lost him. Not until she had left him far behind. She could still hear him behind her. His feet pounding on the ground and his voice echoing in her head.

There, up ahead was the park gate. She had run the entire width of the park. Once she was out she would be able to outrun him. To leave him behind.

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The second the words had left his mouth the rain had begun to pour down on them and Sara had been off and running like a shot. At first he had just sat there watching her retreating form, but then his brain had yelled at him to move. But by then she was already way ahead of him. He had yelled at her, but that just seemed to make her run even faster so he had simply concentrated on not losing sight of her.

As he ran he mentally berated himself for allowing his tongue to slip. Even if it was true, but even he hadn't know it to be true until he had said it.

In just over month he had fallen in love with the most sarcastic, dry humored women with the emotional stability of an active volcano and a foundation to match. And he had no idea how or when it had happened.

Up ahead he saw Sara disappear through the park gates. He pushed himself to run harder. At the gate he stopped and looked up and down the street. But Sara was no where in sight.

"Fuck!" He kicked at a large puddle, forcing water into his shoe. Not that it mattered he was completely soaked anyways. Connor stared rather blankly across the street. Suddenly he focused in on what it was he was looking at. He was staring at Saint Joseph's Catholic Church.

He made his way across the street and pulled open the heavy wooden door. He wasn't surprised to find it unlocked. Didn't matter what part of town you were in, the churches were always left unlocked at night, they were sanctuaries after all.

Inside he stopped, a puddle quickly formed around his feet, he wasn't the only one seeking sanctuary. All the way at the front of the church in a crumpled heap in front of the crucifix was Sara. And her shoulders shook with sobs.


	24. Sanctuary

Once her crying stopped, Sara roughly brushed the tears from her face. She looked up from her position on the floor at the face of Jesus on the cross. His wooden eyes stared down at her hollowly.

"What do you want from me? Everything I have has already been taken from me. I have nothing left to give to you or to anyone else."

"Ya don't really believe that do you?"

Sara didn't have to look to know who was standing behind her. In fact she really wasn't that surprised. Even if he hadn't thought to have looked in the church he would have found her eventually. It was inevitable; they were both inexplicably drawn to each other. She stared straight ahead as he knelt beside her.

"Ya say that if we let this happen it will destroy us both. But it's already destroying ya."

"My life was destroyed before I ever met you."

"But ye've rebuilt it." Connor reached for her hand, but she pulled away. He sighed. "Sara I…"

Sara could feel a fresh onslaught of tears forming. She blinked in an effort to hold them back. "Don't say it." Sara turned her head. "Don't you dare say it."

"And why the hell not?"

"Words like those aren't meant to be thrown around lightly Connor."

"Yer afraid I don't mean them. Damn it Sara. Ya of all people should know I would never lie about something like that." He took her by the shoulders and forced her to look at him like so many times before and brushed a tear off of her cheek. "Ya once told me that we keep going because the ones we lost wouldn't want us to give up. Ya really think yer ma would want ya to let something like this go?"

"What if it doesn't work?"

"What if? If ya don't take this chance ye'll never know and spend the rest of yer life wondering what if. Don't let yer father and that asshole who raped ya keep ruining yer life. This isn't about ya turning me down anymore. This is about ya putting the past behind ya for good and moving on. Maybe when ya realize that ye'll finally be able to start living again. Because right now ya might as well only be half alive." He made to stand but Sara grabbed his arm forcing him to stay. He gave her a questioning look.

"Swear to me that you meant it." Her brown eyes were dark and demanding. "Here, now in this church, with God as your witness, swear it."

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"Sara, before God and all that is holy I swear it. I love ya." And Connor could tell that she believed him. The fear was still present in her eyes but she believed him. Cautiously he leaned forward, tilting his head. He stopped just centimeters from her mouth. When she made no motion to pull back he kissed her ever so softly on the lips.

When he pulled away Sara's eyes were closed. He kissed her on both eyelids and then on her forehead, and then pulled her into his embrace. Her fingers clutched the damp fabric of his black shirt. They stayed like that, on their knees just holding one another and absorbing each others warmth through their wet clothes.

Connor pulled back slightly and ran his hand down her face to the base of her neck. He kissed her again, deeper this time and felt her hands release his shirt and go around his neck. He gently bit her lower lip and then sucked on it, running his tongue across the soft flesh. When his tongue entered her mouth she moaned low in the back of her throat. Connor slid his hand down across of her back to where her shirt met her jeans. He needed to feel her. Slipping his fingers beneath her shirt he began to trace the line of her spine, pushing her shirt up as he did. His other hand left her neck to rest on the firm planes of her stomach.

Sara began to kiss the line of his jaw while constantly running her fingers through his hair. When she nibbled hid earlobe Connor just about lost it right there. He pressed her hips closer to his own and he captured her mouth once more.

The sound of a door opening and closing, followed by footsteps made them stop, and remember where they were. Connor groaned at the loss of contact and watched as Sara adjusted her shirt.

Down by the door of the Church a member of the clergy appeared. When he saw them he stopped and then proceeded down the aisle towards them. Connor quickly stood and pulled Sara to her feet.

"Can I help you two young people at this late hour?"

"Forgive us Father. We were seeking temporary shelter from the rain."

"I see." The Fathers eyes raked over both of their soaked figures. "The church is a sanctuary, but I shall inform you that the rain has ceased for the moment. I would think it best that the two of you be on your way."

"Yes sir. Thank you." Connor pushed Sara in front of him. She walked the past the Father with her eyes downcast. As Connor made to follow the Father stepped in front of him.

"Need I remind you that this is a house of God?"

"Forgive me Father. But I have yet to sin this night. Nor do I have anything to confess."

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Sara stepped out onto the street and rubbed her arms trying to get rid of the goosebumps that covered them. The rain had indeed stopped.

"This will be the third time that I'm going to have to get ya out of wet clothes." A pair of warm arms wrapped around her. "I say we go back to the apartment," Connor pushed her hair out of the way and began to plant kisses on her neck, "and finish up," he turned her around, "what we started." He went for her mouth only to find himself pushed back. "What, ya aren't changing yer mind on me are ya?"

"No." Sara looked at her hands which were resting on Connor's chest as he curled his fingers around her wrists and rubbed them with his thumbs. "I just think we should take this slow."

"How slow are we talkin' 'bout here? Cause I rather like the speed we were going inside…"

"Connor! We were in a church!"

Connor couldn't help but grin. "That didn't seem to be an issue at them time. Though I must say that priest would have been in for a surprise had he showed up seconds later."

Sara blushed. "And who's to say it would have gotten that far?" She removed her hands and began to walk down the street.

"Sara we both know where that was going."

"Yes, but I for one am glad the priest showed up when he did."

"Now why would ya say a thing like that?" Connor pulled her into another hug. "Ya once asked me to show ya how love was supposed to feel. I couldn't show ya then, but I can show ya know. But yer right. The church not the best location for that to take place"

"Believe me Connor; I want you to show me. I'm just not ready for that yet."

"Ya certainly felt ready."

"Connor…"

"Alright." He kissed her on the nose. "We'll take it slow. But ya sure as hell better let me know when ya are ready. Ya put me through much more of this and I'll fucking explode."

"Yes, well," Sara began to walk backwards down the street pulling Connor along with her, "we certainly wouldn't want you to explode prematurely now would we."

Connor gave her funny look. "And just what the fuck is that supposed to mean?"

Sara laughed. "Whatever you want it to mean."

"Woman!"

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Connor walked into the bedroom and turned off the light. After a few seconds of contemplation he declined his bottom bunk and instead slipped under the sheets next to Sara in the single. She stirred but didn't wake. Connor rested his head on his left arm and with his right pulled Sara into the curve of his body. She may not have been ready for him to show her the full extent of his feelings and desire for her, but this, this he knew was okay.

Even in her sleep Sara knew he was there. A small smile formed on her face and she snuggled even closer to his warmth, letting out a sigh as she did so.

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**Author's Note: **_Connor lied to a priest! What am I saying? They were just about ready to go at in the church! That would have been sacrilegious. Thank God for bad timing. But I must say the wait is starting to drive even me crazy. Well, you guys know the drill. Read and review! _


	25. Cat's Out of the Bag

Sara yawned and stretched out her arms and legs. She rolled over onto her side and looked at Connor's still sleeping form. She stifled a laugh. He looked rather silly. He was dressed in only his boxers, lying on his stomach, with his face smashed into the pillow and his mouth half opened. But at the same time it was cute.

She looked at the clock on her nightstand. It was flashing 10:30 AM at him. Thankfully she didn't have to work this Saturday. Old Mr. Jenkins, her boss at the bookstore had gone away for the weekend, and he didn't let anyone run the store without him. She decided to try and get some more sleep. It had been a while since she had slept in. Not to mention by the time she and Connor had gotten in the night before it had been awfully late.

Sara carefully repositioned her body into a more comfortable position, making sure not to wake Connor in the process. But instead of falling back asleep she found herself watching Connor as he slept.

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Connor opened his eyes to find Sara already awake and looking at him. "mornin'," he mumbled sleepily.

"Morning."

"How long ya been awake?" Connor rubbed the sleep from his eyes

"Not long."

Connor leaned forward to give her a kiss but stopped when she gave him a funny look. "What?"

"Morning breathe."

Connor raised his eyebrows. "Me or ya?"

"Both."

"If ya think I care about something as stupid as morning breath, then ya are daft women." He pulled her against him and paid loving attention to her lips. When he let her go she gave him a dazed and very content smile.

"That was nice."

"Aye."

"But it would have been better without the morning breath." Sara squealed as Connor began to mercilessly tickle her.

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Murphy paused near the top of the stairs and frowned. Mary behind him touched his shoulder. "Something wrong?"

"Do ya hear that?"

"Hear what?"

"Screaming. And it's coming from my apartment…" Murphy ran up the last of the stairs with Mary close behind. He didn't even bother to unlock the door he just kicked it open and ran straight through to the bedroom. "What the fuck is going on?"

Connor and Sara both looked up from the mass of tangled sheets on the beds. They were in a rather compromising position. Connor was straddling Sara's thighs and her tank top had been pushed all the way up to just below her breasts. Her face was red and tears were streaming down her face.

Murphy took this all in and came to one conclusion. "Ya fucking bastard!"

"Murphy wha.." Connor never got to finish what he was going to say as Murphy roughly grabbed him and threw him on the floor. "Fuck!" Connor kicked Murphy in the back of the knee knocking him off his feet. What followed next was an all out brawl between brothers.

Mary ran over to Sara and helped her sit up. "Are you okay? He didn't do anything to you?"

Sara shrugged her off and got of the bed. "Murphy, stop it!" She grabbed his arm in an attempted to pull him off of Connor but was tossed back. Mary caught her before she fell.

"Damn it all. Murphy! You're acting like a complete jackass." There wasn't anything she or Mary could do but watch both brothers beat each other up.

For a majority of it Murphy had the upper hand. But finally Connor managed to shove Murphy off long enough to get to his feet. He charge his brother and tackled his around the middle sending them crashing into the dresser. Murphy slumped down the floor and Connor staggered backwards. Sara grabbed Connor around the waist and led him back to the bed. She made him sit down and taking his face in her hands assessed the damage. His bottom lip was cut and bleeding, and he flinched when she touched the area around his left eye; he was going to have a black eye before the day was over. "Are you alright?"

"Aye. But I'm gonna be sore thanks to that stupid fuck. Murphy what the fuck were ya thinking?"

Murphy glared at Connor as he pushed off the floor and got to his feet. "I was stopping ya from taking fucking advantage of her. I never would have fucking guessed ya, my own brother, capable of such a thing."

"Murphy you are an idiot." Sara stood in front of him with her hands on her hips. "He wasn't taking advantage of me."

"But Sara it looked like… I heard screaming… he was sitting on ya… yer face…"

"He was tickling me! And my face was that way because I couldn't breathe and I was crying because I was laughing so hard. Jesus Murphy!"

"Tickling?"

"Yes Murphy. Tickling, a perfectly harmless game under normal circumstances. But thanks to you my boyfriend has a split lip and what will soon be a black eye!"

Mary stepped up to defend Murphy. "Would you lay off of him already. He didn't know."

"Yes because once again he just reacted instead of taking the time to find out what was going on. And you obviously thought the same thing."

"Sara it's okay." Connor had stood up and placed his hands on her shoulders. "He meant well."

Sara turned around to face him. "Are you kidding me? He just beat the crap out of you. And you're just going to forgive him."

"He's me brother. We have fought worse over less. And he thought he was protecting ya. It did look rather bad."

Sara threw her arms up. "Fine. The both of you have no sense whatsoever."

"Wait a second." Mary looked from Sara to Connor and then back to Sara. "Did I hear you right? You called Connor your boyfriend?"

Connor and Sara looked at each other. They hadn't talked yet about what they were going to tell Murphy and Mary or if they were even going to tell them at all. Connor for one wanted nothing more than to tell everybody he met, but as far as he knew Sara might want to keep it quiet for a while. Not that is mattered now that Sara had inadvertently let it out of the bag. But he figured he let Sara decide. Let it out, or cover it up?

Sara bit her lip and asked Connor with her eyes. He held up his hands letting her know that it was her call.

"Well? I'm waiting for an explanation. And does it have anything to do with that kiss the two of you shared last night in the bar while Sara was supposed to be working?"

"The kiss in the bar was to trick some guy into thinking we were dating so he would leave me alone." Sara let out a sigh. "And yes, I called Connor my boyfriend. Because after the kiss in the bar and other events we decided we couldn't just be friends anymore."

Mary squealed and slung her arms around Sara in a hug. "I knew it. And it's about time!" She pulled back. "So tell me everything."

"No."

"What? Oh come on."

"What happened last night is private. All you have to know it that we are together and happy."

Mary looked at Connor. "So you're not going to tell us?"

"Sorry Mary. But I have to agree with Sara. Side I'm letting her call the shots, for now at least." He wrapped his arms around Sara's body and rested his chin on her shoulder.

"Why thank you Connor." Sara rolled her eyes and grinned. She looked over at Murphy who looked rather confused.

"So Connor wasn't taking advantage of ya and now yer dating."

"Yes Murphy that is how it is."

"Right. So doe that mean the two of ya fucked?"

"Murphy!" Three voices said at once.

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**Author's Note: **_I just figured it was time for Murphy and Connor to beat each other up a bit. This just made it a little more interesting, not to mention showed just how close and understanding of the other they actaully are. They forgive each other easily. Read and review._


	26. Secret Plans

Mary jumped in front of Connor and held a piece of plastic directly in front of his face. "Ta-da!"

Connor squinted and pulled back. "What is that?"

"Sara's identification."

Connor plucked it from her fingers. "Ya stole her ID. Whatever for?"

"Read what it says."

Connor rolled his eyes. "Sara Fiona Gabriel. Messena, New York." He kept reading. "Sex, female; obviously." He looked at Mary. "Just what am I reading this for? I already know all this."

"Keep going."

"Hair, blond; eyes, brown; height, five foot eight; weight, 135 pounds. Born June fifth 1977… okay that I didn't know. And that's…"

"Two days from now." Mary took the card back. "On Wednesday it's her birthday. She'll be twenty four. Makes me wonder what she is doing dating a geezer like you."

"I'm only four years older than her Mary. Yer just jealous cause yer the youngin' of the group." Connor tussled her hair. "Yer only twenty twenty two. That makes Murph six years older than ya. And ya call me old."

"Whatever. You're twins."

"Aye, but as far as age gaps go yer the one dating the old man."

Mary punched him lightly on the arm. "So what are you going to do?"

"What do ya mean?"

"For her birthday. You have to do something."

"Yer meddling, ya know how Sara feels about that."

"As far as Sara is concerned I do nothing but meddle even when I'm not. I just want her to have fun on her birthday."

Connor wrapped an around Mary's shoulder. "I get that, really I do. But I didn't even know when her birthday was. She never told me. And I think it is because her birthday holds unpleasant memories. Her ma died on her ninth birthday."

"So help her build new ones." Mary slapped the Id card against his chest. "You are her boyfriend. Make her birthday something good to remember as well."

Connor had to admit Mary was right. Sara had made so much progress; this was just another way to keep it going. "I can tell by the look on yer face ya've already got an idea of what to do."

"Do I ever." Mary's face broke into a large grin. "So this is what I'm thinking…"

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"Murphy where are we going?" Sara was getting pulled along behind him. He had showed up at the bookstore on her lunch break and had convinced her boss to somehow let her have the rest of the day off. When Sara had asked what was going on he had told her that Mary was having him run some errands. And one of the things he had to pick up was her. He had then taken her to lunch before heading to his next "errand." And Sara was confused.

"I told ya, to get a haircut."

"But you don't need a haircut, and even if you did why am I here?"

Murphy stopped and Sara almost ran into him. He turned around and faced her. "I'm not the one getting a haircut. Ya are."

"Me, but…"

"And don't say ya don't want one. We all know ya do." He started walking again.

"Okay fine. But why are you taking me?"

"Mary asked me to take ya. So I'm taking ya."

Sara frowned. It wasn't like Murphy to do much of anything when asked. You usually had to force or coherence him into doing it. And as for something like this, she could imagine Mary taking her. But Murphy? And where was Mary, and Connor for that matter. She hadn't seen or heard from either of them all morning. And yesterday she had barley seen them at all. Something was up. But she had no idea what.

"Here we go." Murphy stopped and pulled open the door.

Sara just stood on the sidewalk and gaped. This wasn't just a place to get your haircut. It was an all out salon. "Um Murphy, I think this is a little much for just a haircut."

"This is where Mary said to take ya."

"Are you sure? Because I'm pretty sure this is way out of my price range."

Murphy sighed and took her by the arm. "Just come on. If I don't do this right Mary will 'ave my hide."

"What?"

Inside Murphy walked up the receptionist. "I have an appointment for one o'clock."

The attractive brunette arched a delicate eyebrow and raked her eyes over Murphy. "You do?"

Murphy realized what she thought. "It's not fer me," he turned and pointed at Sara. "It's for her. My girlfriend made the appointment yesterday. It's about the…" He stopped, glanced at Sara, who frowned at him, and then leaned forward to whisper something into the woman's ear.

"Oh, that's right." The woman's face lit up in understanding while Sara's looked more confused by the second. The women stepped from behind the counter and approached Sara. "Well lets get started shall we?"

Sara gave her a wary eye. "With what?"

"Sara it will be fine."

Sara glared at Murphy as she was led away toward the back. "Murphy! What is going on?"

And then she disappeared behind the partition. Murphy groaned and rubbed his hand across his face. Why was he the one in charge of this again?

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Murphy shifted in the pink armchair he was sitting in and stared at the clock on the wall. It had been nearly an hour and half since he had seen Sara. Mary hadn't said anything about it taking so long. Fuck, if he had known it was going to take this long he would have said no to this. But that was probably why she didn't tell him.

Not to mention he felt extremely out of place. Murphy was a guy's guy. Sure he liked his women looking attractive, but he himself wanted little to do with the process. He closed his eyes with a sigh and let his shoulders slump. He was so bored. All the magazines were about hair makeup and fashion, so not his thing, and he was getting some odd looks from the women around.

"Eh-hem."

Murphy opened his eyes. Sara was standing in front of him with a not to happy look on her face, hands on her hips and her foot tapping. Still Murphy felt his jaw drop. "Fuck." She looked amazing. Her hair had been cut to just below her shoulders and layered, and it had also been styled so that it framed her face in soft waves. And she was wearing makeup. Her face had a bright clear look to it. Murphy realized that she was wearing makeup.

"Murphy."

"Aye?"

"I have just endured an hour and a half of pampering. My hair isn't just cut, it's been styled. I got a facial and am now wearing makeup. I received a manicure, and a pedicure." Sara shook her hand in front of his face. "And no one would tell me why! I feel like a Barbie doll! Is there anything else that Mary has planned for me? Because if so, I'm not doing it."

"No, this was it. I can take ya home now." Murphy was still rather awestruck. Even though she was still in her jeans and blouse, her natural beauty was simply enhanced.

"Good, and wipe that stupid look off your face. Mary sees you looking at me like that and we'll both be dead." Sara turned on her heel and left the salon, letting the door slam behind her.

Murphy let out a low whistle as he stood to follow her. Damn she was feisty. Connor was going to have his hands full tonight. He couldn't help the grin that crossed his face.

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"You said we were going home."

"We are, but first I need to stop by and see Mary about something."

"Fine Murphy, you go see Mary. I'm going back to the apartment to fix what those women at the salon did to me." Sara began got walk.

"The fuck ya will." Murphy stepped in front of her. "yer not going anywhere until I see Mary."

"Murphy," Sara whined. "I feel very not like me at the moment. Not that I didn't mind being pampered today, but there is a difference between being pampered and feeling like I'm in someone else's skin."

"I don't see what the big deal is."

"Well Murphy you weren't the one just forced to undergo a makeover."

"Sara, if ya would just come up to Mary's apartment the sooner this will all make sense a whole lot sooner."

Sara looked up at the window for Mary's apartment and then down the street in the direction of hers. "You've got ten minuets. Then I'm leaving."

Murphy opened his mouth to protest, but thought better of it. Besides, Mary was better adapted to deal with this whole thing. It was mostly her idea after all.

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Mary squealed when she saw Sara. "Oh my god you look fantastic!" She pulled her into a hug. "He's is going to die when he see you."

Murphy wandered into the kitchen to grab a beer. He had had enough of all the girl stuff.

Sara brushed Mary off. "Who's gonna die?"

"Connor. Duh."

"Wait, Connor was in on this whole forced makeover as well? What is wrong with you people? What the hell is going on?" Sara was rather distressed.

Mary didn't look so excited anymore. "Are you really that freaked out?"

"No, I'm just really confused. I'm not used to all this." Sara put her hands up. "I feel like a girl."

"Ya are a girl."

"Shut up Murphy, you know what I mean." Sara didn't even look at Murphy standing in the kitchen doorframe. "I probably wouldn't mind this so much if I at least knew the reason why?" She begged Mary with her eyes. "Please."

"Okay. But you have to promise not to get mad at me, because I meant well."

"What?"

"What's today?"

"Wednesday."

Mary shook her head. "I was thinking more specifically along the lines of the date."

"The date…? It's June fifth, but what does that have to do with all this?"

"Your birthday." Mary steeled herself for an onslaught of something. But nothing happened. She looked at Sara and relaxed ever so slightly.

"That's it? You made me go through all this because it's my birthday. Mary I appreciate the gesture but you could have just bought me a present."

"So your not mad?"

"No." Sara looked surprised. "Why would I be mad?"

"Because you never told us when your birthday was and the only way I found out was by 'borrowing' your wallet so I could get you ID. That and it isn't just your birthday, its, you know…"

Sara smiled. "Right, my mom. I can see why you'd think I'd be mad. I never told simply because i didn't want to make a big deal about it. But you could have just asked me."

"Told ya."

"Shut up Murphy."

Murphy mumbled something under his breath and went back into the kitchen.

"So," Sara put her hands on her hips. "Was this whole makeover my present?"

"It's part of it. At least the part from me and Murph."

"There's more?"

"Yeah." Mary grabbed Sara's hands. "Come on, I've got something to show you in the bedroom."

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**Author's Note: **_My longest chapter yet. Still it is more of a filler to lead into the next chapter. Oh the things I have planned... Keep reading and reviewing. And if you have any ideas for the story i would love to hear them. Writing is just as much about knowing what your readers want as it is about writing what you want. Thanks again._


	27. Check Please

Connor looked at his watch impatiently. It was 6:45 pm, and the reservation at Laurels was for seven. Where was Sara? Mary had promised him that she would have her ready and there on time. Not that he was worried about losing the reservation or anything, he was just really anxious to see Sara.

"For fucks sake it's just dinner," he muttered and tugged at the color of his shirt. As well as having spent most of the day before trying to find a gift for Sara he had also bought some slightly dressier clothes at Mary's recommendation. He wore a pair of khaki slacks with a brown belt and shoes and a long sleeve blue button down shirt. He hadn't been this dressed up in ages.

But who was he kidding, it wasn't just dinner. It was her birthday, not to mention what could be considered their first official date even though they had already been together for a month.

Putting his hands inside his pockets, Connor's fingers brushed the case of the small jewelry box that was there. He wondered if Murphy ever got like this around Mary.

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Sara sat, hands clutched tightly in her lap, in the back seat of the cab. When Mary had finally explained that Connor was taking her out to dinner the first thing that had crossed her mind was that she didn't have anything to wear. She had told this to Mary who had laughed and simply said, "Not to worry. That's the other part of your present from Murphy and me. And it isn't white."

She smoothed her hands over the fabric of the dress and smiled. Mary had picked well.

"Here you go miss."

Looking up, Sara saw that she had reached her destination. She paid the driver and pulled open the door, putting one foot out onto the sidewalk.

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When Connor saw the taxi pull up he felt his heart skip a beat. When the first arm and leg appeared he swallowed, and when the passenger had fully emerged he stared.

Sara looked incredible. Not only was her hair and makeup done, but the dress she was wearing… he felt a familiar sensation down south but forced it back.

It was brown and hugged her figure perfectly. With smock capped sleeves, a deep v-neck line that ended in a gather just below her breasts, which then flowed into an A-line skirt that ended at the knee. And on her feet she wore a pair of bronze sandal wedges.

Not that any of this really registered with Connor. He was more focused on Sara.

She felt his intense stare and looked up, her eyes locking onto his. A smile broke out on her face along with a faint blush.

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Sara took a step forward towards Connor only to trip. Luckily Connor was quick enough to catch her and help her stay on her feet. "Ya alright?"

"Yes." Sara lifted her foot and adjusted the sandal. "It's just these stupid heels. I'm not used to them." She set her foot back down and straightened. With her heels she stood exactly eye to eye with Connor. She was rather surprised at the intensity which he was looking at her, it didn't help any that the blue shirt he was wearing brought out the color of his eyes, making them seem bluer than ever. "What?" She gave a nervous laugh.

"Nothin'." He ran his finger across her cheek and kissed her lightly on the lips. "Yer just beautiful is all."

"Thank you. You clean up pretty good yourself."

Connor grinned, offering his hand and she took it. "Ya hungry?"

"Starving. I haven't eaten anything since I had lunch with Murphy."

Inside Laurels they were quickly seated in the main dining room and given menus. Sara examined their surroundings, the restaurant was elegantly modest. High ceilings, warm lighting and soft colors filled the entire room with a comfortable atmosphere.

A waiter came over. "Good evening. Can I get you anything to drink before you order?"

"Yes, we'll have two glasses of yer best white wine."

"Very good sir." The waiter disappeared in the direction of the bar.

"Connor?"

"Aye?"

"The best? Isn't that a little much?"

Connor took Sara's hand in his and ran his thumb over her fingers. "Stop worryin'. This is supposed to be a fun relaxing evenin'. I can afford this. Tonight ya and I are just like any other couple. We're on a date and celebrating yer birthday."

"It's just that the makeover and the outfit seem like so much already."

"Well, that's from Murphy and Mary. This is from me." Connor leaned over and brushed his lips across Sara's, relishing the feeling. Sara wrapped her hand around the back of his neck and deepened the kiss.

"Excuse me… sir?" The waiter was back with their drinks and looking rather uncomfortable.

Connor sat back a smile playing at the corner of his mouth, and Sara looked down at her hands, her cheeks pink.

"Are you ready to order sir or would you like a couple more minuets to look over the menu?"

"I think we're ready.

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Sara placed the last bite of braised lamb shanks in her mouth and chewed, eyes closed and savoring every ounce of flavor. "Mm, so good." She set her fork down and dabbed her mouth with her napkin. Looking up she saw Connor looking at her with that same intense stare. "Would you please stop that?"

"Stop what?" Connor rested his arms on the table, it was clear that he knew exactly what she was talking about.

"Looking at me that way. It makes me uncomfortable."

He smirked. "I only look at ya this way because I love ya."

"I know. But stop."

"Stop lovin' ya, or stop looking at ya?"

"You know what I mean." Sara pushed back her chair and stood. Connor quickly did the same. "Sit down. I'm just going to the ladies room."

"But it's customary for a gentleman ta stand when a women leaves the table."

Sara laughed. "Be careful Connor, if you keep treating me this way I might get used to it." She set her napkin on the table and walked towards the bathroom.

She never heard him whisper, "Ya should get used to it. It's what ya deserve."

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On her return from the bathroom Sara saw that the dishes from their meal had been cleared and replaced by two cups of tea and a slice of triple chocolate cake. "What no candle?" she asked as she sat down.

Connor pulled a single small candle out of his pocket. "What do ya take me for? A cheapskate?"

"After all this, never."

Connor pushed the candle into the cake and whipped out his lighter. He pushed the cake in front of Sara. "Make a wish."

Sara closed her eyes, though for a moment and blew out the candle, receiving a smattering of applause from a couple neighboring tables when she did.

"What did ya wish for?"

"If I tell you that it might not come true." She removed the candle and sucked the bits of cake off that clung to the end. She noticed just the tiniest change in Connor's expression as she did. She had a rather cruel thought pass through her mind. Fine if he wanted to stare at her intently, she would give him something worth staring at. Keeping her brown eyes locked firmly on his blue she set the candle down on the plate and picked up the desert fork sitting next to it.

She pushed the fork into the cake and brought a delicious looking bite up, pausing just before putting it in her mouth. Connor raised his eyebrows at her. She gave him a coy smile in return and then as sensuously as possible place the bite in her mouth and rolled it around. As soon as she swallowed she lowered the fork to get a second bite. But Connor grabbed her wrist.

"Don't."

"Something wrong?" She asked him innocently.

Connor smirked. "Ya know very well what yer doing. I suggest ya stop before ya take things to far."

"Maybe I want to take things to far."

"Sara…"

"Connor." She gave him a pointed look.

Turning around Connor got their waiters attention. "Check please."

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**Author's Note: **_I actually did research for this chapter. I'm so proud of myself, not that it was real extensive or anything. The restaurant is a real one in South End Boston. And you can even check it out it's website . And at these pages you can see the dress and shoes that Sara wore: _

_http/store. _

_http/store. _

_And the foreplay over dinner, I just love it. You know what to do, review! (Hey that rhymed) Because the more reviews I get the more incentive I have to write and upload another chapter as soon as possible. _


	28. Gift of Giving

**Author's Note: **_Okay for whatever reason those web links don't show up. Sorry guys, you just have to settle for your imagination on the previous chapter. Now where were we? Oh yeah…P.S. warning, extremely sexual situation ahead._

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Sara sat tucked under Connor's arm in the cab on the way home. His left arm was on her shoulders, the fingers of his hand entwined with hers. She leaned her head back against his chest and listened to his heart beat, letting out a content sigh. Connor brushed some of her hair out of her face and kissed her forehead.

The cab pulled to a stop in front of their apartment building. Sara got out and waited while Connor paid the driver. She removed her sandals and stood barefoot on the sidewalk. Turning around Connor looked at her bare feet, her shoes, and then her face.

"You try wearing heels."

He just smiled. "Come here." He wrapped his arms around her waist and she wrapped her around his neck, her shoes dangling from her fingers. He leaned his forehead against hers. "I love ya."

"I know."

"And I wish ya would say that ya loved me…"

Sara continued to smile, but her eyes became sad. "I know and I'm sorry. But Connor, please don't ruin it. This night has been perfect so far."

"Alright." Connor nodded. "Alright. But only because it's yer birthday."

"Thank you." She hugged him tightly, her body pressed completely against his. Sara realized that something was pressing into her thigh. She pulled back. "Um Connor either you've got something in your pocket or I really did take it too far with that whole cake thing."

"Wha'?" Connor looked down. "Oh right. I almost forgot." Reaching into his pocket he pulled out a small blue box. "This is yer official gift, from me."

Sara took the box tentatively, almost afraid of what she might find. It looked like the type of jewelry box one put a ring into. But come, on after only a month? She hadn't even said that she loved him yet. Yes, he made her feel like she had never felt before, but to be honest she still had some doubts.

It wasn't a ring. She let out a huge mental sigh. It was a necklace, nothing elaborate or fancy. It was just a small white gold cross on a white gold chain. She pulled it out and let it dangle from her fingers. "Connor, it's beautiful."

"Here, let me." Connor took it and stepped behind her. Sara brushed her hair aside so he could drape it around her neck and clasp it. It nestled quite comfortably in the valley just above her breast. He kissed the back of her neck and rested his chin on her shoulder, his arms wrapped snuggle around her waist once more. "I'm glad ya like it. I wondered if maybe it was too simple."

Sara touched her fingers to the cross. "No," shaking her head causing her newly shorn hair to brush and tickle his face. "It's perfect. This whole evening has been perfect. You've been perfect. Thank you." She untangled herself from Connor's arms and went up the few steps to the door. "You coming?"

Connor followed her into the building and up the stairs. They made rather slow progress because Connor kept grabbing Sara and kissing her. By the time they got the apartment Sara was in a permanent state of giggles.

"Connor," she twisted her head trying to avoid his lips while at the same time trying to unlock the door. "This lock is bad enough on its own. But with you doing tha-ah-t!" His fingers had brushed over her pulse point. "It's even harder to unlock the door."

Connor reached around, took the key from her hand, placed it in the lock, and giving a deft turn and push opened the door. "There."

Sara stepped into the apartment, dropping her shoes on the floor, pulled Connor in after her, closed the door and shoved him up against it. He looked at her surprised, but it was soon covered as she crushed her mouth to his in a heated kiss. When she pulled away he still looked surprised.

"What, you can dish it out, but you can't take it?" Sara let her hands slide down over his chest before turning and starting to walk away. "Pity."

She suddenly felt herself pulled backwards so that her back was pressed up against Connor's chest. With one hand he pulled her hair away from her neck and began to place hungry kisses all along it. The other he slid down over her hip and thigh. His fingers brushed against the skin of her knee and Sara shivered. She turned her head and he captured her mouth, running his tongue across her lip, and the edge of her teeth. Sara reached her arm up and over to the back of his neck and pressed her bottom against his groin.

Connor groaned and spun Sara around in his arms, his hand on either side of her face as he continued to kiss her. She placed her hands on his waist and traveled then around to the back. She grabbed his shirt and pulled it from his pants sliding her hands underneath and then back around to his front where she fumbled with the buckle on his belt. Sara then slid her hands back up his chest to the top button of his shirt, she had just undone it when Connor pulled away and held her out at arms length.

"Whoa," his breathe was short and his eyes had gone a deep shade of blue with need and desire. He scrutinized Sara, whose eyes had gone just as dark, appearing to be two endless abysses that he could easily get lost and drown in. Her hands were still curled around the collar of his shirt. "Are ya ready for this? I want ya to be sure 'fore we go any farther. Cause once it starts it is very hard to stop."

Sara swallowed hard the lump that was in her throat and let out a shaky breath. Slowly she nodded her head. "I'm sure. But maybe we could…"

"Could what?"

"Take it slow."

Connor gave small laugh. She wanted to take it slow when she was the one who had got it going in the first place. "Aye. We'll take it slow."

He kissed her more gently this time as she continued to unbutton his shirt, pushing it off his shoulders and letting it fall to the floor. She kissed along his collar bone while running her fingers across his warm skin. Connor began to move them both in the direction of the bedroom, and he somehow managed to kick his shoes off in the process. They were so focused on each other that they bumped into the couch and the coffee table on the way.

Connor ran his fingers through Sara's hair and over her face and neck as he guided her rather blindly, while her fingers continued their exploration of his torso. He felt his leg hit the bed and turned his body forcing Sara to sit down so that he was between her legs and leaning over her. His kisses traveled from her mouth down the line of her jaw to her neck. He placed his hand on her thigh and slowly began to push the skirt of her dress up. Sara tilted her head and ran her fingers through his hair, mussing it, letting out a low moan when he found her pulse point with his mouth and sucked on it.

All the while he continued to run his fingers over every inch of newly exposed flesh on her legs and thighs. He pushed one sleeve partially off her shoulder and gently nibbled the skin there. Sara slid her hands across his shoulders and down his back to trace waistline of his pants to his front where she popped the button and unzipped them. Connor pulled away and quickly pulled them off, now in only his boxers and sox. Sara couldn't help the giggle that escaped at the sight. Connor removed the sox quickly and then quirked an eyebrow at Sara.

Sara swallowed, and grabbing the bottom of her dress, which was already bunched up around her waist, pulled it up and over her head. She shivered, though she wasn't sure if it was from the cool air hitting her heated skin or from Connor's gaze on her nearly nude body. She was like him, left in only her string bikini underwear, no bra, like always.

Connor ran his hands over her shoulders and down her arms and then back up her sides. But when his hands neared her breasts he felt her stiffen ever so slightly. So instead he wrapped his arms around her, pressing her against his chest and simply ran his fingers up and down her back, tracing them over the lines of her tattoo.

Sara sucked in a breath of air at the sensation of having her bare breasts pressed so tightly against Connor's chest. And she found herself clutching his shoulders tightly as he ran his fingers over back. But under his gentle ministrations she soon relaxed, allowing Connor to slowly ease her back down onto the bed.

He kissed her forehead, her eyelids, her cheeks, her nose, and her mouth, and continued down her neck, leaving kisses all the way. He gently blew on her nipple causing her to shiver, "Connor," she murmured, and then he covered it with his mouth. Sara gasped and arched her back towards his mouth. Connor ran his tongue over her breast, while massaging her other with his hand. Flicking both nipples at the same time, with his tongue and finger, he brought forth from Sara a low moan. When he was done making love to one breast with his mouth he switched to the other, beginning all over again.

Sara put her hands in his hair and pulled back up so she could plunge her tongue into his mouth. Her hands slid sensually down his back and beneath the waist band of his boxers, where she ran her nails across his ass before giving it a squeeze. Connor groaned and kissed her harder, trailing his fingers down between her breasts, tracing her belly button, and then hooking onto her underwear. He slid them painfully slow down over her hips and thighs. Glancing at Sara he saw that her head was back, her eyes closed, and her chest rising up and down in short shallow breathes, and she was clutching the bed sheets with her fists.

Keeping his eyes focused on her face he caressed the insides of her thighs. At his touch, Sara's eyes opened and locked onto his, and she unconsciously ran her tongue over her swollen lips. For the first time that Connor could recall her brown eyes betrayed every emotion. He could see the fear, but mostly he could just see the trust, and somewhere within the depths he could see something else though he wasn't sure what it was.

Connor slipped one finger inside of her and rubbed her clit with his thumb.

"Oh God!" Sara groaned low in the back of her throat and her hips bucked. But Connor held them in place with his free hand as he continued to move his finger in and out of her. He inserted a second finger and Sara began to shake uncontrollable as waves of intense sensation rolled through her body, each one different but equally pleasurable. She couldn't take much more of this. "Connor, please…" she begged.

Removing his hand, he stripped of his boxers and leaning back over Sara Connor kissed her, pushing her legs apart with his knee. She grabbed his hands, entwining her fingers with his. Connor put his mouth next to her ear, "I love ya," and with a steady thrust entered her warm folds.

Sara bit her lip to keep from crying out. But she was unable to stop the tears that formed in her eyes. She took a deep breathe and forced herself to relax. Connor leaned his head against hers and tried very hard not to move. He had already entered her faster than he had planned on, and wanted to give her time to get used to him.

Kissing away her tears he very slowly pulled out of her and pushed back in. Sara let out a moan right in his ear and dug her fingers into his shoulder blades, her legs instinctively wrapping around his waist bringing him closer and deeper.

Moans and indiscernible whispers fell off of lips. Heat spreading throughout both their body as they moved against each, beads of salty sweet perspiration appearing on their skin. Hands constantly wandering across slick skin, as their tongues battled for dominance in their hungry kisses.

Connor's rhythm was smooth and steady, and he could feel his own release building up but he had no intention of letting go until Sara had. He didn't have to wait much longer. As he slid in and out of her once more he felt her muscles contract around him and she dug her nails even deeper into his skins as she moaned his name. His own release coming just seconds later.

His body collapsed onto her and he took swallowed deep breathes. Sara kissed the side of his face and buried her face in the crook of his neck. Connor eased himself back out of her and rolled onto his side, not releasing her from his arms. Pulling the sheet up to cover them both he held her possessively against his body, kissing her once more before closing his eyes.

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**Author's Note: **_Sorry this one took so much longer than all the others. This was a hard chapter to write. So much sexual tension has built up, but it is also Sara's "first" as it were, so trying to set just the right pace was tricky. But all in all I feel I did a good job. And I had fun doing it; I'm not ashamed to admit it. Let me know what you think. So please do REVIEW REVIEW REVIEW!_


	29. Fucking Love Ya!

Sara's eyes fluttered open and she squinted against the morning light streaming through the window. Her body was pressed up against Connor, who was fast asleep. Her head rested on his shoulder, her arm was across his chest and her leg over his. She noticed multiple small red marks marring Connors shoulders and arms. It took her a second to realize that she had made those marks with her fingers and nail. She grinned, what marks Connor had left on her body? She felt a blush cross her cheeks as she remembered the night before. Her body was a bit sore in some areas, but it was a good sore. She ran her fingers over the indentions she had put into his skin, he stirred but didn't wake up. Sara rested the palm of her hand against his cheek.

"I do love you," She whispered. "I just wish I could tell you…" Sara gave a yawn and felt sleep calling to her once more. Resting her head back on Connor's shoulder she closed her eyes and let sleep take her once more.

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"I do love you, I just wish I could tell you…" Sara's words trailed off and her breathing evened out as she fell back asleep. But her words echoed in Connor's head. He had woken up before her but had simply lain in bed enjoying the comfort and closeness of her body. Then she had woken up and began running her fingers over his skin. He had forced himself not to react, simply savoring her loving touch. And when she had said that she loved him he thought his heart was going to burst.

Carefully Connor removed her arm and leg, and slid his own arm out from under her shoulders. He gently tucked the sheet around her body and got up from the bed. Not bothering to get dressed he wandered out into the living area, picking up the discarded articles of clothing as he went and depositing them into the laundry basket.

Going into the bathroom he turned on the water in the shower, letting it run until hot.

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Sara stretched out in the bed and reached her arm out beside her, only to find Connor gone. She stood and wrapped the bed sheet around her body, rubbing the sleep from her eyes as she walked over to the window. It was gorgeous day. She turned back and went into the living room. No Connor, he wasn't in the bathroom or the kitchen either. But stuck to the fridge was a sticky note.

She pulled it off and recognized the hand writing. _'You looked so peaceful I didn't want to wake you. Gone to get Murphy and then go see Smecker. Hope to be back by lunch, Connor. P.S. I love you too.' _Sara blinked, "I love you too? But in order for him to love me too he would have to know that I loved him…" her eyes got big. "Why that little faker! He was awake!"

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Connor walked out of the police station whistling.

"What's gone an' put ya in such a good mood?" Murphy gave his brother a sideways glance. Their meeting with Smecker hadn't gone to well.

"Nothing, me and Sara just had a real good time yesterday evenin'. Remind me to thank Mary would ya. The whole thing was her idea after all."

"Really. Ya both had a real good time. That's all. Fuck, and here I'd thought ya had finally gotten some."

"Shut the fuck up Murph. Ya need to learn to respect woman, and to mind yer own business."

Murphy shrugged. "Fine. I'm just curious. It's just that ya've been so fucking uptight these last couple days and now yer all relaxed. Which I really don't get considering the mood Smecker was in when we left."

Connor stopped walking. "Fine, ya want to know why I'm such a good mood, I'll tell ya." Murphy just looked at him and waited. Connor took a breath, "This morning she finally said that she loved me."

"That's all?"

Connor punched Murphy in the arm. "Fuck ya Murphy. Just because ya and Mary haven't ever said it."

"Hey," Murphy rubbed his arm and glared at his twin, "how the fuck did ya know that?"

"Mary talks to Sara, and Sara let it slip a while back." Connor started walking again.

"Not like my love life is any of yer fucking business Connor."

"I'm not saying that it is. But ya might want to think about that. Cause if ya don't love her ya should end it. It aint fair to Mary."

Murphy frowned. "And since when did ya becoming a fucking expert."

"We've always had something worth fighting. Now I've got someone worth living for. Maybe it's time ya found the same thing."

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Mary was behind the bar cleaning glasses and Sara sitting on the stool with a bottle of beer in her hands.

"So," Mary set put away a glass and picked up another one. "How was your evening?'

"It was really good. We both had a wonderful time. The whole evening was perfect." Sara ran her finger along the lip of her beer and gave a silly grin.

"Just how perfect are we talking about?"

Sara just raised her eyebrows and brought her beer up to her lips.

"You didn't?" Mary tossed her towel over her shoulder.

Sara didn't say anything.

"You did! Oh my god! How was it?"

Sara sputtered and laughed. "What do you mean how was it? It was sex."

"Sara! It wasn't just sex."

"How would you know? You weren't there."

"Connor loves you. When the person loves you it's so much more."

"Yeah, well, I don't know how to describe it."

Mary leaned her elbows on the bar and brushed her hair out of her face. "Well did you enjoy it?"

A blush crept over Sara face. "Yes."

"Ha!" Mary put her hands in the air. "I knew it."

"Mary, you have no idea, he made me feel things I didn't know I could feel. He made me feel alive. More alive than I have ever felt before." Sara could feel her pulse start to quicken at just the thought of what she and Connor had shared. "Is that how Murphy makes you feel?"

"Most of the time yes."

"Only most…"

The door to the pub opened causing both women to look up startled. A rather irate Murphy entered with Connor not far behind with a rather amused look on his face. Murphy went behind the bar and turned Mary so that she was facing him.

"Do ya know how I feel about ya?"

"Murphy what are you talking about?"

Murphy groaned. "Do I have to verbally tell ya how I feel in order for ya to know? Or do ya know me well enough to know that I love ya."

Mary's eyes got big. "You love me?"

"Ah for fuck sake. Yes Mary I fucking love ya."

Mary bit her lip. "Well that's good to know."

"Good to know? What the fuck is that supposed to mean? Good to know. I come in here and pour my fucking heart and you say 'good to know'!"

Mary set the towel down on the counter. "Sara it was nice talking to you. I'm glad you and Connor had a good night. Connor, nice to see you…"

"Aye."

"Now you are coming upstairs with me." Mary jabbed her finger into Murphy's chest.

"What the fuck for? I just told ya I love ya…"

"Murphy, shut up! The sooner we get upstairs the sooner I can show you how much I love you back!"

"Oh. Right then." Murphy grabbed Mary by the hand and pulled her to the door.

The second it closed behind them Sara burst out laughing. "That is the funniest thing I have ever seen."

"Yeah, Murph never was too good with his words. Getting the girl was always easy for him. Hangin' on to them was another matter." Connor took the stool next to Sara. "But at least the idiot finally said it."

Sara turned so she was facing Connor. "Hopefully next time he says it he won't be so annoyed. Just what exactly prompted him to say it anyways?"

"Nothing, I just mentioned that I had found someone worth living for."

Sara smiled and wrapped her fingers around the back of Connor's neck, pulling him to her for a kiss. "I guess that makes two of us then," she said against his lips.

Connor tilted his head slightly. "Is that yer way of saying ya love me?"

"No," Sara shook her head. "This is." She wrapped her arms around him in a hug and said in a low voice in his ear, "I love you."

Connor hugged her back tightly. "I love ya too. Glad to see ya can say when ya don't think I'm sleeping."

"Oh right, I'd forgotten about that." Sara pulled away and slugged him as hard as she could on the arm, and then turned to walk away.

"Oh no you don't." Connor grabbed her arm and pulled her back, covering her mouth with his. Sara grinned against his lips and opened eagerly for his tongue.

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**Author's Note: **_Haha, Murphy, cheeky lil' hothead, finally told Mary how he really feels. And Sara told Connor! Now that that is out of the way, where to take the story next? It still isn't done. Come on people, review and tell me what you all think. Cause you're what keeps me going when I feel like I can't. So if you want me to finish then keep reviewing. Sidse when I'm finally done with this one I can start on a new story that I've got gnawing away at my brain._


	30. Out of the Game

"Fuck!" Connor fell back against the wall with his arm cradled against his chest.

Both Sara and Murphy heard him and looked up from their positions in the room. Worry crossed both their faces. Sara, out of bullets, hit the guy in front of her across the face with the butt of her gun, knocking him to the ground cold.

Murphy pulled out his knife. "I'll finish him. Go check on Connor."

Sara didn't have to be told twice. Shoving her gun back into its holster she ran over to Connor who had slid into a sitting position against the wall. "Are you hit?"

"No I just felt like yelling fuck real loud. Of course I'm fucking hit." Connor clutched his forearm and hissed through his teeth.

"Don't yell at me. I'm trying to help you." Sara glared at Connor but the hurt and fear was evident in her eyes.

"Sorry." Connor removed his hand, showing the sleeve of his coat which was already covered in blood.

"Christ." Sara very carefully helped Connor to remove his coat and then push up his sleeve. At the sight of the gunshot wound she had to fight back the urge to throw up. "Murphy I need your knife and your lighter. Now."

Murphy was by her side instantly handing her both. Sara grimaced at the sight of it covered in blood. Looking around she saw a bottle of wine fallen over onto its side.

"Grab me that bottle as well." She took off her coat and gloves and rolled up her sleeves. "And find me some cloth or something. We can't let Connor's blood get on anything."

Murphy disappeared into an adjoining room. Sara could hear the sound of fabric being torn. She rested the palm of her hand against Connor's cheek. "You're going to be fine."

He swallowed and gave her a rather forced smile. "With ya taking care of me how I could be anything but?"

Murphy came back into the room and handed to Sara a bunch of strips of what appeared to have been a table cloth. Sara quickly used one to wipe the blood of the knife, next she took the wine and poured it over the blade, drying it off again with a second strip. Next taking Murphy's lighter she heated the blade.

"Murphy, get behind him. You're going to have to hold him still."

Connor scooted forward and Murphy got behind him, locking his arms in place. Sara sat on Connor's legs and held his arm firmly with her left hand. She locked eyes with Connor.

"You ready?"

"Aye."

Looking back down, Sara dug the tip of the knife into the wound, and dug out the bullet. Connor convulsed and bit back a yell. She felt tears stinging her eyes, but soon had the bullet out. She grabbed what was left of the wine and used it to clean the injury. Then she heated the knife again with the lighter and pressed the length of the blade against Connor's skin. Grabbing the last two trips of cloth, she folded one over and pressed it down on his arm and then tied it tight with the last piece.

"That should hold it for now. But we'll have to deal with it more fully when we get back home."

Standing and pulling Connor to his feet, Murphy him a reassuring pat on the back. "I'll finish cleaning up."

Sara took Murphy's place next to Connor putting both her arms around his waist and burying her face in his chest

"For fuck's sake Sara, ya act like yer in as much pain as I am."

Sara opened her eyes and frowned, looking up at Connor as she did. "Don't try and make light of the situation Connor. This could have been a whole lot worse."

"Yeah, well it aint. I'm gonna be fine."

"Well excuse me for being scared." Sara let him go and bent down picking up both their coats and her gloves. She shoved his own coat into the hand of his uninjured arm and put hers back on, jamming her gloves into the pocket. Joining Murphy she began spraying the blood that was everywhere with ammonia, and picking up all the empty bullet casings that were lying around.

A mess that had taken only five minuets to create took twenty to clean up so that they wouldn't leave behind any tell-tale signs.

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Mary finished stitching up Connor's arm and wrapped it. "There, you'll live. And I give Sara my praises for quick thinking."

"All she did was pour wine over it and press hot metal to my skin." Connor flexed his fingers and slowly rotated his arm. Still sore, and more than a little tender, but he would survive. It was just a flesh wound.

"Which is more than either you or Murphy ever did before." Mary began to put away the med kit. "She saved me quite a bit of trouble. I'd tell you to rest and not use that arm, but I know you won't listen. But at least use what little sense you have buried under that thick Irish skull of yours and don't overdo it if you want that to heal properly."

"Thanks Mary, ya'd give the best surgeon a run for his money."

Mary rolled her eyes. "Someone has to make sure you boys stay in one piece."

Sara appeared in the doorway. "You done with him?"

"Yup, stitched and cleaned up." Mary stood.

Sara hugged her. "Do you need a ride home?"

"I'll get Murphy to take me. It's about time he did something useful, and I need to talk to him anyways. I see you later."

Mary left them alone. Sara continued to stand in the doorway, fidgeting restlessly.

Connor leaned back on the bed and looked at her. "Ya still mad at me?"

"Why would I be mad at you?"

"I got shot."

"I'm not mad at you for getting shot. I am mad that you got shot."

Connor patted the bed next to him and Sara made her way over, sitting down on the edge of the bed. Connor pulled her into his arms so that her head rested over his heart, and ran his fingers through her hair. "It's what we do, it comes with the territory. And sometimes we get hurt."

"I know." Sara sighed. "I'm not sure I can keep doing this though."

"Doing what?"

"This. Leading a double life." She pursed her lips and furrowed her brow. "It takes a lot out of a person." She looked up at Connor. "I've been thinking that I need to get rid of one of them."

Connor tensed. "Which one?"

"I think I should retire from the business of saints and angels." Sara felt Connor relax again and smiled. "You thought I was going to say we should break up didn't you?"

"It crossed my mind."

Sara snuggled closer. "I admit that I thought about it too. It's getting harder for me to keep us and that separate. How much longer till our concern for the other person's safety gets in the way of our own? This way, I get to keep you, and I still know that you've got Murphy looking out for you."

"Okay."

Sara blinked. "That's it? I'm out."

"If it is what ya want then sure. I'm not gonna force ya to keep doing something ya don't want to do. And yer right. This way I'll know yer safe at home. I got you involved in the whole thing out of necessity. But we did it without ya before, we can do it again."

"Alright then. I'm out, but if there is every an emergency or anything…"

"Then I'll let ya know."

Sara kissed him lightly on the lips. "I love you."

"I love ya too." Connor pulled her tighter against him and rolled her onto her back, slipping his hand under her shirt and kissing her harder.

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**Author's Note: **_ you know the drill, review please._


	31. Change

Murphy raised his glass high in the air. "Here's to Sara, the best angel, and honorary saint there ever was. May yer retirement be everything ya hoped and more." He downed the shot and set the glass upside down with a light bang.

Sara and Connor gave a "cheers" and did the same. Mary left her shot untouched.

"Especially since yer leaving me with that fucker as me only backup." Connor added with a grin.

"Hey," Murphy waved his finger in Connor's face. "I have never let ya down, and I'm not about to fucking start now. So be nice."

Connor swatted Murphy's hand away and reached for his beer. "Now it's my turn for a toast." He pushed back his chair and stood up.

Sara laughed and rolled her eyes. Both Connor and Murphy were well on their way to being drunk. And she wasn't far off either. Thankfully they had decided to celebrate her 'retirement' in the confines of the apartment rather than out on the town.

"Here's to the woman we love, safe at home at night and out of harms way!"

"Aye, I'll drink to that."

"Murphy right now you'll drink to just about anything." Sara sipped her beer all the while grinning like a complete moron.

"I'll drink to that as well," Murphy said with a laugh and leaning so far back in his chair that he almost fell over, but Mary reached out and caught the back of the chair.

"Murph, you might want to slow down a bit."

"Aw come on Mary, we're just getting started." Murphy grabbed a slice of pizza from the box in the center of the table. "But ya haven't touched yer drink all night."

Mary sat back in her seat. "I'm just not in the mood tonight."

"But we're celebrating. Ya don't drink ya end up brining down the whole party." Murphy pushed her glass into her hand.

"I said," Mary yanked her arm away and the glass toppled off the table onto the floor making a mess of broken glass and spilt beer, "I'm not in the mood."

"Fuck Mary, is it that time of the month or something?"

"Fuck you Murphy." Mary stood and walked into the living room. The front door was heard opening and closing.

Murphy got up to follow her, but Sara grabbed his arm. "After that I don't think she's going to want to talk to you right now."

"But I don't even know what's fucking wrong…"

"I'll talk to her." Sara indicated the mess on the floor, "you and Connor can clean that up. I think this celebration has come to an end."

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Mary sat on the steps and leaned her head against the bars of the railing.

"Mind if I sit?"

"Go right ahead." Mary scooted over allowing Sara to sit down next to her.

"So what was all that about?"

"Nothing."

"Mary I know we're all a bit drunk, not including you of course, but that was no reason to snap at him…"

"Sara it is something that I can only talk to Murphy about, okay. So just leave well enough alone."

"But I'm guessing you don't want to talk to him right now."

Mary nodded.

"Okay." Sara gave her a pat on the shoulder and stood back up. "Just talk to him soon though. When things go unsaid for too long you push the other person farther away and lose precious time."

Mary scoffed. "And when did you become the expert?"

"When I let my fears keep from Connor, and when I thought I might lose him when he got shot, even if it was just his arm. But life is too short and precious, especially when the men we love are facing death on a regular basis, to let stupid little things like a drunken 'are you on your period comment' get to you."

Sara turned to go back into the apartment but stopped when she heard Mary mumble something. "Sorry, I didn't catch that."

Mary looked up at Sara, her face scared. "I said, not when your period is a week late."

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"So what do ya think their talkin' 'bout out there?"

"No idea." Connor was in the process of sweeping up the broken glass. "Are ya sure ya haven't done anything recently that would have her mad at ya?"

"Positive. I mean ya she's been acting a little moodier than usual, but I figured that was because she was on her period."

Connor rolled his eyes as he dumped the broken glass into the bin. He grabbed at rag off the counter and tossed it at Murphy. "Maybe that's the problem. Yer not sensitive enough to her female needs. Ya can't go around blaming everything that a woman does out of the ordinary on her period."

"Well a whole lot fucking easier than admitting I've done something wrong. Especially when I haven't." Murphy began to wipe up the spilt beer. "Besides, that is the most obvious reason I can think of, I mean she hasn't let me touch in three days.'

"Murphy MacManus, have you finally worn a woman out and made her sick of ya?" Connor laughed, only to be hit in the face with a beer sopped rag. "Hey."

"Shut yer fucking mouth ya dumb fuck. Just cause ya and Sara are still in the lovey dovey part of yer relationship. Don't go around pretending to know anything 'bout mine."

"Christ Murph, I was fucking kidding."

"Yeah, well stop. I'm not in the fucking mood. Something is up with me girl, and I want to know what."

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**Author's Note: **_Well if that isn't obvious I don't know what is. Still, I should have fun with this new plot twist. So let me know what you think. Come on people, I want, no I need, reviews! I'm feeling neglected and ignored. I know my updates are farther between but that's cause of school, and I'm sick at the moment. But don't worry, they will keep coming._


	32. Two Months

Sara shifted back and forth on her feet as she stood in the drug store aisle. Her eyes darted back and forth to make sure that there was no one nearby. Biting her lip she turned her attention to the multitude of products on the shelf in front of her. Pregnancy tests. "Why do there have to be so many of these stupid things? Bad enough that a girl has to wonder about being pregnant, but then she has to try and determine which test is best."

"Excuse me miss, can I help you with what you're looking for?"

Sara nearly jumped and turned around to find an elderly man in a pharmacists coat looking at her with a kind smile. She blushed. "Um, no. You see I was just… um, browsing…"

The man nodded. "I understand. You're here for a friend."

Sara blinked. "Yes, how did you know?"

"Most woman your age who stand in this aisle and act like you have been acting for the past five minuets are here for a 'friend'."

"But I really am here for a friend," Sara said, rather irked that this man was presuming she was the one the test would be for. Still part of her new it was to be expected. If it really was her she would be saying it was for a friend.

"I believe you." The man reached over and pulled a box from the shelf and pressed it into Sara's hand. "This one is best choice. It has an accuracy rate of 90. And I hope everything turns out the way you want it." With that he turned and left her alone.

Sara looked at the box in her hand; she figured she might as well grab some other stuff while she was here. It would look less like she was here just for a pregnancy test. Besides, the med kit needed restocking.

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Back at the apartment Sara dropped her bag of purchases on the table, went over to the cupboard and pulled out the med kit, setting it next to the bag. Next she grabbed the phone off the hook and wandered into the bedroom as she dialed.

"Hey, Mary, it's Sara. I got it… do you want to come over here or should I come to you?" Sara paced back and forth. "Alright, I'll be over there in about twenty minuets."

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Murphy and Connor came into the apartment and went into the kitchen looking for something to eat.

"Looks like Sara did some shopping." Murphy opened the bag on the table while Connor went to the fridge and began pulling out the fixings to make a couple of sandwiches. Seeing that is was all stuff for the med kit Murphy began to transfer the gauze, disinfectant and other such items.

"What are you doing?"

Murphy looked up at Sara who was standing in the doorway with the phone in her hand. "Just putting this stuff away for ya."

"Right." Sara stuck the phone back on the hook and walked over taking the bag with its few remaining items from his hand. "Thanks, but I'll finish up. Just want to make sure it's all organized properly."

"Suit yerself." Murphy shrugged and went over to the fridge, pulling out a couple of beers.

Connor finished the first sandwich and handed it to his brother. Murphy took it and sat back down at the table. As he lifted his beer to his mouth, out of the corner of his eye he saw Sara quickly remove something from the bag and into her purse, at the same time the receipt fell out and onto the floor. Sara didn't notice, she just tossed the empty bag into the garbage and put away the med kit. Grabbing her purse she walked over to Connor and hugged him, giving him a kiss on the lips.

"I'm heading back out. I'll see you later tonight."

Connor put down the knife he was using and pulled Sara tighter against him. "Yer not going anywhere till you give me a proper hello, followed by a proper goodbye."

Sara wrinkled her nose. "Not with Murphy in the room."

"Fine," Connor kissed her lightly on the nose. "But ya better plan on making up for this indiscretion this evening."

Pulling out of his arms, Sara stepped back. "I'm not so sure about tonight." She looked at Murphy and then back at Connor. "But let's talk about this later, when it's just the two of us. Okay?"

Connor stared after her as she left, and then turned to Murphy. "Did I just get blown off?"

"Aye that ya did. Not so nice is it."

Connor pulled out a chair from the table and sat down. "Something is up, first Mary…"

"Who is still actin' fuckin' weird."

"…and now Sara. And I'm pretty sure I didn't say or do anything."

"Woman, who knows." Murphy leaned over and picked up the receipt that had fallen unto the floor.

"What's that?"

"Drug store receipt. Sara dropped it."

"See if she paid with cash. Might want to hang on to so she can record it if not."

Murphy looked at the bottom of the receipt. "She paid cash." He then scanned the list of items bought. His eyes got wide. "Fuck."

"What?"

Murphy handed the receipt to Connor. "I think I might have figured out why ya just got a bit of cold shoulder. I saw her put something into her bag rather in secretive sort of way. Look at the fifth thing listed that she bought."

Connor's eyes went where indicated. "Home pregnancy test…fuck. Sara might be pregnant? This can't be happening. We've always been so careful."

"Are ya hundred percent sure?"

"Fuck yes…" Connor let the receipt slip from of fingers. "Except, oh shit. The first time, on her birthday… oh fuck."

"That was two months ago."

"It would make sense though. Jesus Murphy, I aint ready to be a dad."

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**Author's Note: **_Oh the web of confusion that I weave, not only does Mary still not know for certain, and Murphy not know at all, but now Connor thinks it's Sara! Review!_


	33. What's Going On

"Mary, stop pacing. You're making me nervous."

Sara was sitting on the toilet and Mary was walking back and forth outside the open bathroom door, her eyes darting to the test which was sitting on the bathroom counter next to the sink. She was an absolute mess. Her hair was mass of unheeding curls, her grey eyes were tired with bag underneath them and she was still in her pajamas, even though it was almost two in the afternoon. She stopped pacing and put both hands on either side of the door.

"How much longer?"

"Mary you just took the thing…"

"How much longer?"

Sara looked at the timer. "We've still got a minuet and a half to go. Now would you please sit down? Stressing out this much isn't healthy, and it can't be good for the baby." Mary gave Sara a pointed look and Sara held up her hands in defense. "If there is a baby."

"What am I going to do if it comes up positive? I'm not ready to have a baby, I'm not ready to be a mom. And I sure don't want to be a single mom."

Sara stood up and rested her hands on Mary's shoulder. "Calm down. We still don't know if you are pregnant. And even if that thing does come up positive, well, even these test can be wrong. Remember, it's only 90 accurate."

"Only."

"Hey, that is a still a ten percent chance. So if it comes up positive we call and make an appointment to test again to be sure."

"And then what Sara?"

"Well if it's negative, then good, your period is just late."

"And if it is positive my life is fucking screwed."

"Mary…"

Mary shook Sara off. "Leave it. I just want to see what the test says, and I'll go on from there."

Sara gave Mary a concerned look and bit her lip. "Have you figured out what you're going to tell Murphy?"

"Right now I'm hoping I won't have to tell him anything."

The time went off with a ding. Both girls froze and their gazes moved toward the test on the counter. Mary pushed Sara aside and reached for the test, her hand shaking. Taking a deep breath she lifted it and opened her eyes.

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Connor woke up from his nap on the sofa somewhat confused about what had woken him up. Then he heard Sara and relaxed visibly. She was back. He rolled over on his side and looked at her. She was facing away from him and talking on phone in a low voice. Connor strained to hear what was being said.

"The box said something about a false positive? Right… tomorrow morning…do you have anything available at a later time? No. Well then 9:30 is fine. Yes, thank you very much."

Suddenly it call came back to Connor, why he was taking a nap in the first place. Sara giving him an aloof good bye, the pregnancy test, the realization that their first time had been unprotected. His brain had felt ready to explode so he had lain down in an effort to organize his thoughts and calm down. Glancing at the clock on the wall he could tell that he had in fact slept for a couple hours.

But now this. Sara had taken the test and it had come up positive, and now she had made an appointment to confirm it. Connor quickly pretended to still be asleep when Sara hung up the phone and turned around. What was he supposed to do? Confront her or wait for her to tell him? Or hope and pray that the test was in fact wrong and just let life go on as if nothing had happened.

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Sara sighed and put the phone back on the hook. No sooner had she gotten home then Mary had called crying that she couldn't do it, so Sara had called the clinic to fix the appointment. She looked at Connor who was asleep on the sofa. He hadn't stirred when she had come in or when the phone had rung and for that she was grateful.

She made her way down the hall to the bedroom she and Connor shared. They had just a couple weeks ago moved into a larger apartment with two bedrooms and two bathrooms. She and Connor had the larger room with the master bath while Murphy had the other. The rent was more, but Smecker had helped them out by pulling some strings.

Not even bothering to take of her shoes or change Sara fell onto the bed and grabbing the edge of the covers pulled them around her so that only her feet stuck out. It had been a long day.

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Connor waited a good thirty minuet before allowing himself to get up and follow Sara to the bedroom. She lay on the bed facing the wall as he stripped down to his boxers. He gently took her shoes from her feet and then lay down next to her. But when he tried to pull her into his arms she stiffened and moved so that she was right on the edge of the bed.

"Not tonight Connor. I don't feel well."

"Do ya want to tell me…" he ventured but was cut off.

"There's nothing to tell Connor." Sara felt bad for lying. But it was only a partial lie. She didn't have anything to tell, and what she did have wasn't hers to tell.

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Murphy stood outside Mary's building looking up her window. He had gone upstairs to see her but had received a slammed door in his face with no explanation. He wasn't even sure what had him more concerned, the fact that Mary didn't want to see him or the fact that she looked terrible as if she hadn't slept or showered, not to mention her tear streaked face.

He leaned against the light pole and just watched. Occasionally he would see the outline of her figure pass by the window. At one point she even stopped and seemed to be looking back at him. Then she had closed the blinds. At last he saw the lights go out one by one through the apartment. The bedroom window was the last to go dark.

With a sigh Murphy stuck his hands inside the pockets of his pants. He'd try again tomorrow.

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**Author's Note:**_ Oh those poor boys. I almost feel bad putting them through all of this. (Almost.) Their woman are acting very odd and they don't know why. Review!_


	34. Positive Outcomes?

Sara sat in the waiting room of the clinic flipping through a number of pregnancy and parenting pamphlets. She brushed her hair out of her face, back behind her ear and glanced at her watch, she hoped Mary would be back out soon. And with good news, otherwise they were going have some problems.

This morning when she had woken up and gotten ready, so she could go meet Mary to take her to her appointment, she had been doubled teamed by the twins. They had demanded that she and Mary meet them for brunch at the Lakeview diner. She had tried her best to get out of it, but Connor had told her that she didn't have a choice in the matter.

Sara had conceded, mostly just so she could get away from the two of them. And she would go. But she wasn't so sure about Mary, especially depending on what she learned from the doctor.

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"Thank you Doctor Shields." Mary closed the door and made her way down the narrow stark white hallway to the waiting room. She rested one hand on her abdomen. Pregnant, it was very much a reality now. All things considered she felt relatively calm about the whole thing. Her freak out had occurred yesterday. But then again maybe numb was a better word to describe how she was feeling.

She paused in the doorway and looked over at Sara who was sitting and staring blankly at the wall, lost in thought. Best friends, dating brothers. One of who was going to be a father in seven months.

"Murphy, what are we going to do? What are you going to do when you find out?" Mary made her way over to Sara who stood up when she saw her approaching.

"Well?"

"I'm pregnant." Mary expected Sara to say something but only got silence. "You're not saying anything."

"That's because I don't know whether to tell you congratulations or I'm sorry."

Mary allowed herself a small smile. "Thanks either way." As they made their way out of the clinic and over to the car Mary could tell that Sara was itching to ask her something. "Sara if you want to ask me something, just ask."

"Are you thinking of getting rid of it?"

Mary stopped. "What?"

"The baby," Sara looked down at her feet not wanting to make eye contact. "Have you thought of just not having it?"

"Are you saying that I should get rid of it?"

"No!" Sara looked up, appalled that Mary would suggest such a thing. "I was just wondering is all. Because if you were I was going to talk you out of it."

Mary pulled open the passenger side door and looked at Sara across the roof of the car. "So I take it your against abortion?"

Sara slid into the driver's seat and put the key in the ignition. "Well, yeah. I could have just as easily have been aborted myself. My life may have been pretty miserable, but it got me where I am now."

"But what if Murphy doesn't want the baby?"

"Murphy may be an ass at times, but I don't see him capable of something like that."

"What if he doesn't want me?"

Sara frowned. "Then I will kick his sorry Irish ass until he comes to his sense. Which reminds me, when do you plan on telling him?"

Mary leaned her head back and closed her eyes. "The next time I see him. If I wait to long I'll loose what little nerve I have."

"Good, because I promised him and Connor that we would meet them for brunch."

"What!"

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Connor and Murphy sat in a booth in the far corner of the dinner, sitting with their backs to the wall so that they could see through the restaurant and out the windows to the street. They both wore their sunglasses and were smoking cigarettes, Connor already on his second. He took a deep drag, nervously tapping the end into the ashtray in the center of the table and ran his hand over his face and back through his hair.

Murphy gave his twin a look of sympathy. He felt for his brother, he really did. If Sara was pregnant then life had just gotten a whole lot more complicated for all of them. He knew that Connor would not abandon Sara with his child, and he suspected that Connor was considering the possibility of marriage. He and his brother were saints, though by means perfect. Their own sins were numerous, but both were honorable, Connor almost to a fault at times. Murphy figured this would be one of those times.

Murphy saw the car pull up and park across the street from the diner. He nudged Connor in the ribs with his elbow. They both watched as the car doors opened and Sara and Mary got out. They stood by the car and appeared to be arguing. Mary threw her hands into the air and pointed to the diner, while Sara shook her head and placed her hands on her hips. Mary got back in the car and shut the door, while Sara slammed hers shut so hard the car rocked before making her way to the diner alone.

Connor shared a look with Murphy began to nervously tap his fingers on the table.

"Calm down."

"Murphy how can I be fucking calm? Yer girlfriend isn't fucking pregnant."

"At least Sara isn't avoiding ya like ya got the fucking plague. I still can't get Mary to talk to me. She isn't even coming in the diner."

The bell over the door rang as the Sara entered. She made her way over to the table and held out her hand, keys dangling from her finger right in front of Murphy.

"I can't get her to come in. Here the keys. You want to talk to her, you better hijack the car fast before she can get out."

Murphy looked at her confused. "What?"

Sara groaned. "Go kidnap your girlfriend."

"Oh. Right." Murphy grabbed the keys from her and slid out of the booth. He gave Connor a quick pat on the back and an apologetic look for leaving and not being able to offer support. But there was no way in hell he was letting Mary off so easy. "See ya."

Sara, rather than taking the spot Murphy had left empty next to Connor, instead sat across from him. "Glad that's going to be taken care of." She picked up the menu. "Mary was starting to stress _me_ out. So have you already ordered or no? Cause I'm really not that hungry, so I was thinking maybe we could just share a plate." She lowered the menu and looked at Connor. "What do you think?"

Connor took a deep breath. "I think," He said slowly, "that Mary and Murph aren't the only ones who need to talk."

"Um, okay…" Sara leaned back and crossed her arms. "What do you want to talk about?"

"I know about the baby."

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**Author's Note: **_What can I say here? In all honesty I have no idea, so I won't say anything except for REVIEW!_


	35. Oh Baby

"Baby," Sara just managed to get out. "What baby?" Her mind began to whirl as she tried to figure out how he knew.

"Don't lie to me Sara. Murphy saw ya putting the pregnancy test in yer purse the other day and we both saw it listed on the receipt from the drug store."

"Murphy knows?" She turned her head and looked out the window, but the car was already gone. That was one situation she could do nothing about. Still, he hadn't seemed upset when he'd left, in fact he had almost seemed excited to go and talk to Mary. Perhaps this wasn't such a bad thing after all. She turned back to Connor. "How much do you know?"

"I know ya went to a clinic this morning with Mary. I overheard ya on the phone when ya made the appointment," Connor explained before Sara could ask him how he knew that as well. "So there really is a baby."

"Yeah, there is really a baby."

"Why didn't ya say anything before?"

Sara frowned. "Firstly wanted to be sure, and second because it didn't concern you, that's why."

"What?" Connor leaned forward. "Of course it concerns me. Sara this changes everything."

"Connor," Sara grabbed his hand. "You think I don't know that? This is going to affect all of us. I'm a worried about how we're going to make this whole thing work, not to mention more than a little freaked out by this whole thing."

"Is that why ya haven't let me near ya these last couple of days?"

Sara felt her cheeks flush. "Yeah it is, and I think we should keep it that way for a while too."

"Sara we can't let this baby stop us from loving each other."

"I'm not; I'm just saying we should keep our hands to ourselves."

"Not like we'd be risking anything."

"Hello Connor, sex. I think we'd be risking a hell of a lot right now. I don't know about you, but I'm not ready to be a parent."

"I'm not either Sara, but I don't think we have much choice in the matter anymore."

"Sure we do. Hence no sex."

"I get the fact that yer concerned about the baby, but I don't think sex will hurt it. And I've missed being with ya and showing how much I love ya."

Sara leaned across the table and kissed him on the lips. "I've missed you too."

The touch of her lips was something that Connor had been craving for days. He quickly began to deepen the kiss, but felt Sara pull back.

"Wait a second." Sara scrunched up her face. "Us having sex wouldn't hurt the baby. I'm just trying to avoid having a baby."

"Did ya never get the talk?"

"Connor need I remind you that my sex education was, um, of the practical sort. You had to reeducate me as it were."

"Well allow me to reeducate ya in this. Ya can't get pregnant when yer already pregnant Sara."

"Now I'm really confused. What are we talking about?"

Connor gave her a look. "Ya not wanting to have sex cause yer pregnant."

"Cause I'm… you think I'm pregnant!" Sara was incredulous. "Now what gave you that idea?"

Now it was Connor's turn to look confused. "Ya said there was a baby."

"I never said it was mine!" Sara buried her face in her hands. "And Murphy think I'm pregnant too. Great, just great."

"Sara if yer not pregnant than who was the test for?"

Sara looked up. "Think about it Connor. It's not like Murphy is celibate."

Connor felt a combination of relief and horror at this new information. "So yer not pregnant?"

"No."

"But Mary is?"

"Yes."

"Fuck."

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Mary put her seat back and closed her eyes. No way was she going into that diner. Sara could make her apologies and then take her home. She wasn't ready to face Murphy just yet. A few minuets past and the drivers' door opened and shut, followed by the sound of the car engine being started.

"So what did you tell them?"

"I didn't tell them anything."

That wasn't Sara, but she knew that voice. Mary sat up and looked at Murphy. "Where's Sara?"

"Having a talk with Connor." Murphy pulled into traffic, not once looking over at Mary who he knew was fuming.

"She put you up to this. I'm going to kill her."

"No yer not. Ya and I need to have a talk of our own."

Mary glared and crossed her arms. "I'm not talking to you right now."

"Then ya better get comfortable cause I'm not taking ya home until ya do. I want to know what is wrong with ya."

"Suppose we run out of gas, then what?"

"Then we sit and wait." Murphy gave a sigh. This wasn't going to be as easy as he had thought. He was Irish, she was of Irish decent, and they both had the stubborn tempers to prove it too.

"This is only a battle of wills Murph."

"If this is what it takes to get ya talking to me again and letting me know what is wrong then fine. I will outlast ya."

Mary blew out a breath of air and slumped back in her seat. "Fine, you win. It's not something I could keep hidden much longer anyways. Chances are Sara would tell you if I didn't. And even if she didn't tell you it would be pretty obvious in another couple of weeks. Just do me one favor."

"What?"

"Pull over. And don't ask why, just please do it."

Not wanting to argue Murphy did just that. He pulled over to the curb and put the car into park. He turned sideways and reached over placing his hand on Mary's seat. "So what is it?"

"Remember when we were celebrating Sara leaving the saints and you made the drunken comment about me being on my period?"

"Yer still pissed at me for that? Ya have got to be kidding."

"Murphy just let me finish." Murphy closed his mouth and nodded, allowing Mary to continue. "The reason I was so pissed off about that comment was because my period was a week late."

"So what exactly? Yer no longer pissed at me and ya have started yer period?"

"No, it's better than that. At least I hope its better; it really depends on your reaction."

"My reaction to what?"

Mary closed her eyes and took a deep breath. "Murphy I'm pregnant."

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**Author's Notes: **_Ta-da! Well, now they know. I can't wait to see Murphy's reaction, but that is for the next chapter. Come on and review, I know you want to._


	36. Proposals

Murphy found himself gripping the back of Mary's seat so tightly that his knuckles turned white. His blue eyes had gone icy and his mouth set in a straight line. "Yer pregnant," he repeated in a low voice. Closing his eyes he turned his head slightly and asked, "what about Sara?"

"Sara," Mary scrunched up her face. "She's not pregnant."

"Oh god." Murphy let go of the chair and turned to face forward in his seat grasping the steering wheel. "The test in her bag, that wasn't for her. It was for you." The possibility of Mary being pregnant had never even crossed his mind. How could he have missed it?

"You knew about the test?"

"Aye. But none of that is really important right now." Murphy forced himself to relax. He was no good to Mary, let alone himself, wound up so tightly. He stiffened slightly when he felt Mary place her hand on his forearm. He looked at her tired face and felt an overwhelming wave of love wash over him. He pulled her into his embrace, resting her head on his shoulder and running his fingers through her red curls. "I'm so sorry ya had to go through the finding out alone. But I'm here now."

Mary clutched at his shirt with desperate fingers. "You're not mad?"

"Surprised, scared, unprepared, and more than a little confused. But no, I'm not mad. I'm just relieved that yer okay." He pressed his lips against her forehead. "I love ya and I don't ever want ya to keep something this big from me ever again."

"I'm so sorry." Mary felt herself breaking down, filled with relief. A stray tear escaped and ran down across her check. Murphy thumbed it away.

"Don't be sorry, this isn't anyone's fault. It's just something that happened and we are gonna make the best of it. We're gonna make it work."

Mary wrapped her arms around Murphy's neck and placed her mouth against his, kissing him with quivering lips.

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Sara sat on the sofa and stared blankly at the television. Connor came in from the kitchen and sat next to her, pushing a steaming hot cup of coffee into her hands.

"Ya alright?"

"Just worried. I was hoping that they would be back by now, or at least called."

"I'm sure their fine."

Sara sipped her coffee, hissing as it burnt the roof of her mouth. She set it on the end table and leaned back against Connor's side, his arm comfortably draped across her shoulders. "It's just I saw the way you reacted when you thought I was pregnant, and we both saw the way Murphy reacted when we saw us in bed the morning after we got together."

"He isn't gonna beat her up."

"Connor, when it comes to losing tempers, you and Murphy are different. You tend to steam up like a teapot and then let off a loud whistle when ya can't take anymore. While Murphy on the other hand just kind of explodes."

"Murphy is the biggest ass I know. And aye, he's got a nasty temper to boot. But he doesn't hurt the people he cares about. Trust me I know. He's not just my brother he's my twin. Live with someone for 28 years and ya get to know them pretty well. Whatever happens, whatever he ends up doing, it will be the right thing and the best for the both of them."

Sara reached across Connor's lap, grabbing his other hand and entwining her fingers with his. "And what was the right, and best thing you had planned when you thought it was me pregnant with your baby?"

Connor looked down. "I was gonna ask ya to marry me."

"So certain I'd say yes. Asking someone to marry you just because their pregnant it a bad reason."

"It isn't the best reason, but it isn't always bad."

"It was with my parent's."

"But we're not them. And I wish ya would remember that." Connor unwrapped Sara from his body and stood up.

Sara sighed and followed him into the bedroom. "I'm just saying. I mean it's not like your asking me to marry you now that you know I'm not pregnant."

Connor stopped and turned around so suddenly that Sara almost ran into his chest and forced to step back. He looked her right in the eye. "Let me ask ya this. Do ya want to get married right now, and this has nothing to do with being pregnant or not or even to do with me, just do ya want to get married right now?"

Sara shook her head.

"Do ya want to get married someday?"

"Yeah, I guess."

"Could ya possibly see yerself marrying me?"

"Sure. Connor just where is this conversation going?"

"When someday rolls around I'll ask ya and let ya know."

"So you are saying you want to marry me?"

"Aye, just not right now."

"But you were going to ask me because you thought I was pregnant."

"Sara I love ya." Connor pulled her into a hug. "And I'd like to think that marriage might someday be in our future. That I'm not always gonna be a saint, that I'll have a normal life. And if you being pregnant had meant me giving it up sooner rather than later then so be it. I just want to be with you." He dipped his head and kissed her gently, one hand resting lightly on her hip, the other cupping the back of her head.

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**Author's Notes: **_Can I get one big 'ah' from my readers. AH… there we go. I must admit this title seems just a little bit on the cheesy side. But I love it anyways. You know the drill, so I'm not even going to say the ominous R word. Just do it, cause I want to know what you think._


	37. Making It Work

Mary woke up to the smell of coffee and food. It smelled wonderful. So why did she feel so gross. She threw back the covers and stumbled into the bathroom where she emptied the scant contents of her stomach into the toilet.

She felt a warm hand on her back rubbing gently and another pulling her hair back. When she was done Murphy grabbed the hand towel that was hanging next to the sink and handed it to her to wipe her mouth. He then sat back against the tub and pulled her into his lap, cradling her against his chest.

"Ya alright?" he murmured into her ear.

"Yeah, just some morning sickness I think. The smell of breakfast brought it on."

"Ya saying I can't cook?"

Mary looked up and saw that Murphy's eyes were twinkling, and indication that he was kidding. "No. I'm pretty sure I smelled bacon, I've heard the smell of meat can make pregnant woman sick to their stomach."

"Aye, bacon and eggs. But I can whip up some toast for ya instead."

"With raspberry jam?"

Murphy's chest vibrated in a pleasant way against Mary's ear as he laughed. "Aye, with raspberry jam. And I'll make up a pot of tea as well."

Mary snuggled closer. "Who would have thought I'd ever get you domesticated."

Murphy just smiled and rested his hand on Mary's belly. At only eight weeks she wasn't' showing but he could feel that she was harder underneath. "Ya said that baby's due around early February."

"Yes, the doctor said I conceived in early June."

Murphy sat up straighter. "Ya don't think it was the day I came and I told ya I loved ya? The day after Sara's birthday."

"I don't know, it could have been. In which case I have no complaints. That was a wonderful afternoon. Murphy," Mary rested her hand on his cheek. "Do want a boy or a girl?"

"I hadn't really thought about it. I just found out yesterday. Have ya thought about it?"

"I think I would like a boy."

"Not a girl?" Murphy was surprised. "How come?"

"I hate pink," Mary stated simply with a grin.

Murphy laughed and stood up, scooping Mary into his arms, who squealed. He carried her into the kitchen and gently deposited her into a chair at the table. "Alright, toast with raspberry jam and tea coming up."

As Murphy began to clean up and dispose of the previous breakfast in order to then prepare the new one Mary realized what he was wearing. His jeans, no shirt, with a yellow frilly apron that she had forgotten she had, and he was barefoot. She grinned. He looked perfectly ridiculous. But the sight of him in her kitchen that way was something she wanted to hold onto.

"Murphy."

"Aye?" He turned around holding a slice of bread in one hand and a butter covered knife in the other.

"Move in with me?"

Murphy set the bread and knife down on a plate, and moved to Mary, kneeling in front of her. "Remember what happened last time we tried that?"

"Yes," Mary grabbed his hands. "But I want to give it another go, for us and the baby. And you are the one who said that we would make this work."

"Alright." Murphy nodded and rubbed the palms of his hand over her thighs. "We'll give it another go."

The phone rang and they both looked up. Mary stood and grabbed it while Murphy went back to making toast.

"Hello." Mary wrapped the phone cord around her finger. "Oh, hey Sara… I'm fine… it worked out, better than I had hoped for actually…" Mary blew a kiss at Murphy who grinned. "Listen, could you do me a favor… I need you start packing up Murphy's stuff to bring over here... yes we are… yes I am well aware that they both thought you were the one who was pregnant… no I didn't know that… Murphy never said anything… look I'll talk to and see you later… bye." Hanging up the phone Mary turned to Murphy. "Connor was going to propose when he thought Sara was pregnant."

"Did he?"

"No, but he was going to."

Murphy just shrugged and stuck the bread in the toaster. "I suspected that he might, but he never said anything to me." He looked back up. "Why?"

"Would you ever propose to me?" Murphy sputtered and coughed while Mary looked at him with an amused expression. "Well?"

Finally regaining his composure Murphy managed to say. "I think we should see if we can even do the living together first before we start thinking about that."

Mary crossed her arms and leaned against the counter. "Murphy I do believe I have just made you uncomfortable. And don't worry, I'm not asking you to ask me. I am nowhere near ready for marriage, baby or no. I was just curious."

"Fuck Mary, don't scare me like that."

"I didn't realize that the thought of marrying me was that bad."

"It's not. I'm just not ready either."

Wrapping her arms around his waist Mary kissed his neck. "Well I'm glad we agree on that then. And it is an awkward conversation out of the way allowing us to focus on other things." She began to nibble on her earlobe causing him to groan.

"And what of breakfast?"

"I'm hungry for something else right now."

Murphy reached his arm back and pulled Mary around so that she was between him and the counter. "And the baby?"

"Even unborn babies need love."

"Mary…"

"You won't hurt either of us. I promise." Taking his face in her hands Mary kissed him, slipping her tongue past his lips.

Giving in Murphy untied his apron, letting it fall to the floor. He lifted Mary up in his arms and she wrapped her legs comfortably around his waist as he carried her back to the bedroom.

He lay her down on the bed and gently covered her body with his and whispered "I love you" before capturing her mouth and making them both forget all else.

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**Author's Note: **_At least we see the softer side of Murphy. And right now it feels like I'm getting toward the end at last. It's a combination of happiness and sadness. Well review please._


	38. February Fin

_FEBRUARY…_

Mary screamed and fell back against the bed, exhausted and covered in sweat. Her grip on Murphy's hand loosened as she tried to catch her breath.

"Easy there Mary. Yer doing just fine." Murphy brushed her hair away from her sweaty forehead.

"Just so you know," Mary looked at him with her tired grey eyes. "I hate you right now."

Murphy blinked, "what did I do?"

"You got me pregnant."

"It takes two."

"Murphy." Even in the state she was in Mary was still quite capable of giving him the look.

"Shutting up."

Down by the feet the doctor spoke. "Alright, Mary. One more push should do it. Let's get this bundle of joy into the world. Are you ready?"

Murphy helped her sit up and lean forward once more, one arm around her shoulders helping support her, the other in her hand. He prepared himself for the pressure his aching fingers were about to undergo again.

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Out in the waiting room Connor paced back and forth while Sara sat in one of the uncomfortable hospital chairs. It was just past three in the morning and Mary had been in labor for nearly five hours.

Sara grabbed Connor by the arm as he went past again. "Would you stop pacing and please sit down. You're making my dizzy." Connor sunk down in the seat next to her dazed and she rubbed the back of his neck. "You okay? You've been awfully quiet."

"Murphy's gonna quit."

"What make you say that?"

"He's gonna be a father."

Sara rested her chin on his shoulder. "Has he said he's going to quit?"

"Not in so many words…"

"Well, wait until he says it before you start jumping to conclusions. The last couple times you both jumped to conclusions you ended up with a split lip and a black eye, and then you thought I was the one having a baby."

The double doors at the end of the waiting room swung open and Murphy appeared in his scrubs. Connor and Sara both stood up as he approached. Murphy grabbed Sara and pulled her into a bone crushing hug. "It's a boy! A healthy boy!"

The minuet Murphy let her go Sara sucked in air and coughed. "And Mary?"

"She's fine, tired but fine. She did absolutely amazing." Murphy was beaming. "I can't wait for ya to see him. He's just perfect."

Connor slapped his brother on the back. "Congrats 'Da'."

Murphy's eyes got wide. "Fuck. I'm a father."

Sara laughed. "You just now realized that?"

"No, it's just, I don't know. Fuck…"

Sara wrapped her arms around Connor's waist and looked at him. "And you're an uncle. Uncle Connor. I like the sound of that."

"Aye." Connor ran a hand through his hair. "It's hard to believe we've got ourselves a wee little MacManus now. So when can we see him?"

Murphy glanced back to the doors. "Right now their cleaning them both up and then transferring them to a room." He went to go back. "I'll come get ya once she's settled."

"Hey Murphy."

"What?"

"What did you name him?"

Another grin crossed Murphy's face. "Cayden Murphy MacManus." And then he was gone, the doors swinging shut behind him.

Connor pulled Sara back over to the chairs and sat her down, kneeling in front of her. "Well, Murphy is a Da, Mary is a Ma, and I'm an uncle. Seems like the only person who got left out is ya."

"I'm not complaining. I got to be a part of it just the same." Sara got a knowing look in her eye. "Want to know a secret?"

"Sure."

"Murphy's going to ask Mary to marry him."

"Yer kidding?"

"Nope, dead serious. I even helped him pick out the ring. I'm still not to sure why he decided to wait until after the baby, I mean Cayden, was born."

"Well maybe he had the same idea I had."

Sara smiled and scrunched up her brow. "What?"

"To have all the good things happen on one day." Connor reached for his coat which was slung over the back of Sara's chair and put his hand in the pocket, pulling out a small blue box. "Sara Gabrielle, how would ya feel about becoming an aunt," Connor opened the lid revealing a single inset diamond in an white gold band, "as well as my wife?"

Sara paused a moment, her gaze focused on the ring and unreadable, before answering. "If you were to give me the choice of going back and not stepping through that door to the pub, and consequently erasing the last year, as well as everything that is to come, I would have to tell you no. I would walk through that door all over again."

Connor looked confused. "Is that a yes or a no?"

Sara removed the ring from the box and slid it onto her finger, "That is a definite yes," and flung her arms around Connors neck almost knocking him back off his heels.

Connor hugged her back and kissed her. "Guess this mean's we're all quitting."

"But you will always be my saint no matter what."

Brushing a strand of hair away from Sara's eyes Connor said, "And you'll always be my angel of life."

Leaning back Sara snorted, "Now that is just plain cheesy."

Connor smirked. "I love ya."

"I love you too."

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**Author's Note: **I finished! I feel like jumping for joy and crying all at the same time.


End file.
